Does anyone have any recommendations for health insurance? I'm running out of COBRA in October and I have two options: find my own plan or marry my fiancé early. The problem for option 1 is that I have a preexisting condition - bipolar type 2. The problem for option 2 is that it seems to be hurrying things a bit and will cloak us in secrecy to be married a year early (a secret marriage?!) before our big wedding. Does anyone know what I can do or have any suggestions or similar life experiences to share with me?

P.S. I live in California, I'm finishing graduate school and I'm on hunt for a full time job with health insurance!

Just a few tips from my COBRA days lol. First, preexistings are okay as long as you are currently insured. Begin applying for coverage asap, as you cannot have a gap in coverage or you will be in a pickle. Google California's preexisting condition high risk health plan, I don't know the name of it and there is a long waiting list but it may be an option.

My only opinions on the two options are as follows:

find out what your fiance's health plan requirements are as to when a dependent can be added following a qualifying event like marriage, make sure it will occur prior to expiration of your COBRA, preventing gap in coverage is super important.

Changing when you get married is very personal, and something that requires a lot of thought on your part. Some things I would consider are why exactly you set your date a year from now, was it financial, emotional, etc. Are the reasons it was set a year from now fixable or is it really better to wait.

PS I think it sucks in 2012 to have to have this health insurance discussion, but I am one of those who longs for the days when u paid the doctor in chickens and he mixed your medicine in his office lol.

Good luck in your health insurance journey

We got secret on-paper married about seven months before our actual wedding, and it was totally worth it. No one knew, it didn't feel real, we celebrate our anniversary on our wedding day. And we saved $3,000 on taxes that we put towards the wedding!

See if you can find a catastrophic plan. It's usually cheaper and has a huge deductible, but if it's only for a year then you should be fine (take care of all your regular appts before cobra runs out).

Contact an insurance broker to get the widest variety of options. If they are all too $$ then you can consider the wedding option.

Did you check with your boyfriend's insurance - do you HAVE to be married or can they add you as a domestic partner? Friends of ours did that, she is now on his health insurance but their wedding is Sept 22.

If not, I would definitely vote for secret wedding, a little clandestine subterfuge is exciting

What a helpful post! Hmm, they did deny me even though I'm still on COBRA.

We set the wedding a year out because we wanted a big wedding and also his father died in January and we wanted probate to be closed. Probate has closed early, we are all healing, but the date and everything else has been set in motion already. We also wanted to do a bit more couple's therapy but we're not delaying because we're not ready to get married.

It indeed sucks. It makes me so mad.

He works for a big, well-known fortune 500 company. He has wonderful insurance but they only give benefits to same sex partners and married couples.

I worry that people will not fly out for the wedding if they find out we're already married! Has that been a problem for your friend?

Well, that's simple. Don't tell anyone.

it is not unusual for couples to have a civil marriage followed by a formal wedding and as Glory says you don't need to tell anyone.

I have this problem because of my weight. Luckily I am still in grad school and can get insurance through school. Are you guys already living together? If so I vote for secret marriage too.

Unfortunately my school health insurance is terrible. We've lived together for over a year now and are looking to buy a house together this winter so secret marriage does look like the most practical option. I'm just terrible at keeping secrets but at least I can share with y'all!!

Haha, yeah, not complaining, just explaining the reality. Interesting rules!