Some people have tried to tell me that my eating a healthy diet should be a priority. But do you ever feel like lmost every time you're doing well, something happens that just turns your whole world upside down? I was on my third day of doing VERY well with good low-carb eating to start really tackling this weight I've added since Ben was born, when I got a call from my sister Thursday evening just before 5:30pm. My dad died.

This was completely unexpected, and it's still tough for me to type those words, let alone say them out loud. Apparently, my mom came home from work and just found him face down on the floor already cold. He was not obese, had recently had his blood presure meds DEreased because he was doing so well, and wasn't on any other meds except an acid reducer for some reflux. They ruled out "foul play," so they just consider it "natural causes" and don't do an autopsy; it's assumed heart attack or aneurysm. It's so hard for me to not know exactly what happened.

After I pulled myself together a bit, I went into zombie shock mode packing things for me and Ben and my dogs and having my husband pack his own things, and we left our home (me, my husband, Ben, and our 2 small dogs) after we gave Ben a bottle and put him in a clean diaper and pajamas to go to my mom's house 4 hours away. We got here around 12:30am Thursday night (Friday morning?), and we will be here until Wednesday.

Thank goodness Ben is such a gret baby. He basically slept in the car the entire way down, had a bottle when we got to my mom's, and then slept again until 6:30am. I brought some of his blankets, his pacifiers, and his white noise machine, and my sister borrowed a pack n' play from friends (he sleeps in a pack n' play at home), so things are as much like home for him as possible, and he's been eating and sleeping normally. And his smiles and coos are, as my aunt put it, good for the soul. He will never know how helpful it is to have him here at this time, especially for my mom (his Mimi).

So, yeah, in all of this, my diet has become one of whatever is easy to grab when I'm hungry. I certainly don't have much of an appetite, so I truly do only eat when hungry, but friends and family have been bringing pastas, potato salad, pastries, and other easy (carby!) foods.

We have more family from Connecticut (where my parents and I grew up) coming down in the next couple of days. I will be happy to see them since we don't get to make it up to CT very often, and I'm happy they will get to see Ben, but I hate these circumstances.

Jill, I'm so sorry for your loss. I think you are handling this unforeseen circumstance very well. You will get back to normal soon enough and I doubt if you have done any real harm to your diet.

Jill, I'm so sorry for the loss of your Dad. Stay strong.

Jill, I don't even have the words.

I'm so sorry. Right now, I really think your diet is probably not even on the radar of things you need to be dealing with. It'll be there when it's time. For now, taking care of you and your mom and Ben is more than enough.

I'm so very, very sorry. May you find some sort of peace in the days and weeks ahead.

I'm so sorry to hear about your father. When I think of my own parents, I think of all the great advice they give me when I'm going through stuff. The idea that that's been silenced for you is so terrible, we never really stop needing our parents. Take it easy on yourself while you're there. There's plenty of time when you get back home to get yourself back on track.

I've lost both my parents, my mom just 3 years ago similar to your dad, passed away at home with no apparent cause. We did not ask for an autopsy either and it is rough not knowing exactly why. I often think of her looking down on me and how proud I hope she is. She died when my daughter was only 1 and I hate that my children won't know her. Anyway I just wanted to let you know that I know what you are going through and that while it is really rough now it gets easier. I wouldn't fuss too much about your food, obviously do the best you can but if there was a time to use food for comfort this would be it.

Thanks, everyone This house is full of ziti and cookies and brownies and cupcakes and macaroni salad and...no comfort eating (yet, anyway!), as I don't have much of an appetite, but everything I do eat is pretty much junk! Which I wouldn't worry about too much except it's making me kind of gassy

I now it will get easier in time, but I fear in the short term it may get harder in the next few weeks and months before it starts to get better. Right now, we're all just sort of in autopilot, and Ithinkwhen we have time to really sit back nd not have paperwork and chores and whatnot, it'll hit harder, especially for my mom. She will have to figure out over the coming weeks/months what she wants to do as far as try just living in this house alone or what. We have already told her we would love for her to come stay with us - we just moved into that bigger house, and having a live-in grandmother would be great with the baby! We'll see, though. It's up to her.

oh my dear jilly. such sad news. on the one hand, the suddenness is horrific, but on the other, he was spared a long, painful deterioration. What a shock!

as with the others - what you're eating is the least of your issues right now. Someone from another country once told me [at a wake] that it's their custom to eat sweets while mourning because it helps take away the 'bad taste' and to add some sweetness to the sadness of the times. Your control will return. I promise!!!!

Ben is a huge blessing, and even though he has no clue what's going on, the extra attention from Mimi and everyone else is wonderful for all.

And yes, there is a lot of stuff to be taken care of, but most of it can wait. for years, if needed. [like cleaning out the closets].

Jilly, I'm so sorry to hear this. I lost my grandfather, who was like a father to me, last year. He went fairly suddenly so we were all in shock and still don't know what exactly happened. Don't fret about the eating right now, you can worry about that later. Just take time to grieve and do what you need to do.

Sending supportive thoughts, Jill, for you, your mom, DH and all. It's such a hard time.

Jilly, I am so sorry about the sudden loss of your father. Words seem so inadequate for a time like this, but know we are here to listen and support you.

I'm so very sorry for your loss You and your family will be in my thoughts

I am so sorry for your loss. Ben is a gorgeous little baby, by the way. Sending well wishes your way. Hang in there, and remember the comfort food in reasonable portions is ok.

Sending thoughts of love to you and your family at this time I'm sorry for your loss.

Jilly...

There are no words that can express my sorrow. May God comfort you and you family.

Annie