So... I am a calorie counter not that it makes any difference but during the week and weekends I do great when it's just my boyfriend and I. I track everything, limit my portions etc. Even if were going out to eat I make the best choice possible. However, when we have guests (which is all the time, living in dc now) I just have no control. We always end up eating out but I struggle to make the good choices I do other times. And since I'm usually not working out it's a double whammy. I feel like I'm throwing away everything I worked so hard for. And with summer coming up there's only going to be more weekends with friends and family here. Not sure if anyone else has experienced this but I gladly welcome suggestions! I've got to get a plan in place!

I know it's hard but maybe until you have a little more control built up, you should limit the amount of tmies you are going out to eat/cooking with friends and family if it sets you back. I know I used to go to happy hour etc. all the time and look forward to going out but there was no way I could stay on plan if I kept that up so now, unless there is a very special reason, I go out once a week, and once on the weekends. I also try to plan it in advance so maybe I can get a workout in before or use my rest day to see friends...doesn't always work but it helps.

There are also a lot of activies [esp with the weather getting nice] that you can do that don't involve going off your diet - hiking, checking out DC monuments, just going for coffee, National Parks, movies...

Also, maybe ck out a few restaurants near you and look at the menu in advance - that way you can find something that wont kill your dieting and next time you have company, you can recommend that place so you have a pre-approved eating establishment.

This is something that's been SO tough for me too [esp. turning down fun invitations]. I want to look good but I want a life too - so you just have to work to find that balance - DON'T give up all that you've worked for!!

I hear you. I have the same challenge. What SOMETIMES works for me is planning in detail what I will eat (when I'm the one doing the cooking). I visualize the foods I'll be eating and visualize turning down the rest. Last night we had family over, and while the technique didn't work perfectly -- I ended up sampling some dessert -- it did limit the damage.

Freelance

I have the same problem, but I'm finding myself doing better each time, because I remember the frustration I felt when I've slipped up in the past and that helps me to step out of the moment and make the better choice. But I'm confident we'll get there!

I have trouble with family and I too am working on that.
I tell myself, "How long will you keep on saying 'just this once?' because the longer you tell yourself that, the longer you will have to settle with your current physique. You always have willpower-when you say Yes-you are making a choice to continue your ways-unless you are being forcefed. If people are upset that you say No than that speaks more about them than you. And clearly fulfilling this desire for the food is not making you happy if you post about it here" Its about giving up one desire to fulfill another, unfortunately an abundance of food we crave does not correlate with the shape we want to be in.
As one 3fcer said "no one after they eat too much ever posts on here happy about it"
Is it that the guests are coming over and you make party food? Try having the fun party food (and regard it as not yours) and some veggie platter that you can munch on. Or that you all go out to eat together? Get the lightest dish-salad with just the veg - and just focus on talking to everyone. Ditch the alcohol or try not even finishing the first drink-don't worry about sticking out, it happens to most of us and its so worth it. Its not to say that we can't all eat out socially, but def less frequently than before unless we can stick with eating small amounts (since the cals are high). I know I can't! lol

It's difficult to control your portions when everyone around you is enjoying their food and eating without any restrain, but in the end it all comes down to how motivated you are and how committed you stay to your goals. I find myself having the same problem when I go out to eat at a restaurant; there's all that delicious food on the menu and seeing people around me eating carelessly sometimes makes me overeat. I then regret it of course and try to balance it all by eating less on my next meal.

In essence, you've developed a bad habit (i.e. letting yourself eat freely around guests). Choose to not overeat, and then have your back on that decision. (Sounds a bit weird, but it helps me sometimes).

Habits can be hard to break, but it's totally possible. I agree with the idea of checking out menus beforehand. If you can't do that, maybe special order something. Get your veggies steamed and fish/chicken/meat cooked with no oil and sauce on the side. It can be a bit awkward with company sometimes, but it can also be worth it (also, sometimes you avoid nasty sauces).

Or maybe do a combo of calorie counting and portion control. If you go out, eat a healthier, lighter (but filling) breakfast, a lighter lunch consisting mostly of veggies or something, and then have a reasonable portion of some menu item for dinner.

It is hard. I've slipped up time and time again the same way.

Good luck!

Thank you all so much for your responses! it is really hard and strange because it's not so much just social settings or things like that. I'm fine at happy hours and restaurants when it's friends I see often. It only happens when it's guest that come from out of town for a weekend or so. Maybe I don't want to feel deprived when I hardly see them or something strange but I'm really going to try and focus on treating it like any other restaurant or social setting and not something that will never happen again.

If it's guests coming from out of town, you probably know in advance that they're coming and that you are probably going out on a certain day. (or all weekend)

If you know in advance, it makes it much easier to plan calories for the rest of the day to accommodate for going out. It's also a good idea to look at menus online if they exist and plan what you're going to eat there before you go.

Just planning ahead works wonders.

When people come and stay, I think it's so great to cook for them. I love to make a great frittata for breakfast, some homemade turkey sausages, etc. Easy dinners like tacos or pasta bakes are crowd-pleasers and can be easily counted.

If I know I'm going out for dinner I try to get a work out in earlier in the day. I don't feel as guilty when I indulge if I've gotten a work out in earlier.

I also count calories and sometimes it's impossible to know how many calories I'm eating so I just make sure to keep my portions small and I always include a salad before I eat anything else.

I also tend to eat less during the day if I know I'm going out that night. That way I have some extra calories available if I slip up.

Good luck! You can do it!