Just a little forewarning this might be long, and kind of ranty.

Background:
So, my weight loss journey has been long, it will be 3 years in September. I have encountered one very MINOR regain of about 15 lbs when I was in University, and then swiftly lost it back. So far, in the 2.5ish years, it was been 2 “bouts” of weight loss. From 269 to around 205-206, then from 220 to a current fluctuation of 170-176. These are 50 lb “cycles” of weight loss.

Round 1: 269-205ish.
Weight watchers, changing habits, cutting out sugar, limiting fast food, etc, eating very low calorie, high VOLUME foods. Basically, if it was fat free, it was fair game.

Round 2. 220- 170-176ish.
Weightwathers, bikram yoga, then a switch to calorie counting. Further elimination of things like lattes, still eating predominantly low calorie high volume foods.

Irony: I am “re-integrating” what I deem to be “real” foods. This means: eating out, and generally eating a smaller amount of higher calorie food, for the same “calorie budget”.

Why?
I feel as though as I approach maintenance (and I am, happy-ish with my current size, although I would like to lose more). Anyways, as I approach this preverbial, long lasting maintenance, I am trying to teach myself this healthy relationship with food. I have become more lienient. I will eat well, for the majority of the time, and then go on these….grazing……”binges” if you may.

So, 80% diet, 20% exercise right? Water levels? Phenomenal. Exercise? Phenomenal. Food? Not so good. I feel as though through trying to develop this, “healthy” relationship with food, this kind, caring and gentle attitude towards my body and how it behaves, and to make it happy, I feel as though I am only making it worse. I have huge issues with portion control, there are many foods that I am unable to keep in the house.

Has anybody ever experienced this? Do you have any suggestions on how to deal? I am not depriving myself, infact, I almost feel as though the issue IS that I am not depriving myself, it is like I have become too forgiving and it may be a slippery slope?

Could it just be that my body has found a happy place for the time being? Should I lay off a little and see what happens?

I feel as though it is time to go onto the next “Stage” of my weight loss, but I need to figure out what it will be.

that's another thing they don't tell you: when you lose a significant amount of weight, your body DOES change. it really does.

at every stage, it's almost like you're starting a whole new relationship with someone who *looks* like the last boyfriend but has a totally different lifestyle.

definitely - take a break. keep doing the things you love but follow a maintenance calorie schedule.

i used arbitrary values on this calculator ( http://www.freedieting.com/tools/calorie_calculator.htm ) - 25yrs of age, working out 3x/wk - and your maintenance calories are around 2160/day.

what i'd do is keep to that for 3-4wks and just give your body a break and give it time to realign itself. that will also give you the elbow room you need to relearn healthy eating habits.

as for portioning? my best friend is a digital food scale.

I know exactly what you mean. I'm doing the same thing and what I've learned is that there are some foods I simply cannot be trusted with. For example, Cheez-Its. I can't have them. Period. I can't stop at one serving so I don't buy them now. But I can, however, have Teddy Grahams. I can stop at one serving with no problem.

So, I feel like I'm eating as healthy as I possibly can in the sense that I'm eating "normally" but acknowledging that I have certain weaknesses I have to avoid. I think this is normal for a lot of people.

I am all for learning to portion out, but I have foods that cannot be in my apartment ever.

~Potato chips, any kind -- the few times that they have made it in for a party, I have hoovered the bag almost by myself. I can't do it

~Frosted Flakes

~Wheat Thins

~Guacamole

Sometimes it's worth it to give into what you need, seriously!

I don't know what you are asking so I'll answer "yes" to all the above.

Yes, I've taken weight loss in chunks.

Yes, each chunk had to address different issues in my life. (single, ttc and pregnant, family person now, etc)

Yes, I have trigger foods. I cannot have them around here. I have to watch my blood sugar and I can't have the spiking me. Because they DO spike me, I lose all control and want to gobble them up like mad. There no such thing to "eating in moderation" with these things and I just accept it and don't bother with them. If I want it, I'll pay more to get the ONE single serving size rather than risk the big size floating around here tempting me. ONE single croissant from a bakery rather than a box from the supermarket for instance.

Yes, I have measuring cups and kitchen scale to portion control the rest.


A.

If we could have a buck for everyone that has asked us that question; we'd be very rich! Better question: is there anyone here who has not experienced this? Probably not ...

I think you should stay the course; meaning stick to your maintenance plan. Be very careful about putting back in "trigger" foods: not a good idea, IMHO. Use your goal weight calorie allotment as your maintenance cap for a few weeks and see how it goes.

Like others have already said, I have come to the realization that there are just some foods that I cannot have in my home -- trigger foods that send me on a binge like salted anything, esp nuts, chips, nachos. For sweets: my favorite cookies (won't bother telling you what they are -- it's too near dinner time).

I have the same "grazing" problem you do; my meals are fine. So, I have really had to minimize my allowable snack list down to fruit, yogurt, cheeze, a few UNsalted nuts, wg soda crackers, NSA puddings, fiber cereal, lean meat, veggies/salads, eggs, etc.

I agree with Astrophe: measure everything and make it a life-long habit. Why take the chance to start regaining? Make your goal to stabilize instead -- hold the line, so2speak ...

I know what you mean about portion problems. There are some foods that I tend to overeat / binge on, so it's difficult for me to keep them in the house. However, ever so often, I try again to integrate them into my diet in moderation. So far, I haven't been successful with doing that. Usually, I'm okay for two days, but then I end up overeating on the third day. For example, Trader Joe's sells a delicious almond butter & chocolate spread. When I first bought it, it took me one day to realize that I could not control myself around it. Fast forward a couple of months, I thought, "I'm going to try again to eat it in moderation." So, I bought it and was okay for a day or two, but on day three, there I was, fridge door open, scooping out finger-fulls of that stuff and cramming it in my mouth.

I used to get really angry at myself for not being a "normal" eater like others are, but now I'm past that. I am what I am; I'll try to improve, but for now, I'll make the adjustments necessary to maintain my weight, and part of that is keeping trigger foods out of my house.

threenorns thank you! i'm also a huge fan of the digital food scale. worst disaster of the day? when the batteries die. almost as bad? when it starts saying "low battery" and i've got a whole batch of something cooked up with containers lined up for portioning! lol. I also know what you mean with seeing a brand new person, these stages are in fact a whole different ball game each time. thank you for the advice on taking some time off, i think that is a phenomenal strategy, and maybe a little maintenance experimentation.

nadya I WISH I COULD STOP!! I typically don't buy junk food, or even graham crackers, but 100 cal bagel thins, ryvita crackers, jars of peanut butter, sometimes it's even cooking more then one portion of something. wierd right? clearly you're up a stage in the game:P

shanhat81 i'm absolutely okay with giving in, sometimes. you know those deep n' delicious mc cain cakes? i'm absolutely okay with sitting down and having one for dinner, exclusively. the issue that i'm seeing is, i can't NOT have the whole thing. no matter how much i portion, no matter if it's in the fridge. it will be gone by the end of the night. and the frightening this in, i am okay with it, i gloat, i will be (pardon my french) happier then a pig in **** after it, and jump right back on the bandwagon. but this behaviour has been happening far too frequently. whereas before i would do it once every 3-4 weeks, and be fine (slight blimp in the radar) now it is minimum a once a week thing. many sad faces.

astrophe i absolutely agree on the single servings/paying more. you actually just gave me a fantastic idea, along with the other posters in this thread. why not ONLY keep clean food in the house - i'm talking, no sweets, no non-fruit/veg cabs/ no crackers/ breads/ desserts etc, and then make those ALLOWABLE things to get when seeing friends? Recently, i find that I have been avoiding going out, because i have typically been known to not count at resteraunts and eat very moderately. resteraunts/social situations will be my "treats", which I try to keep to once every week or two. mind you i'm not speaking about a 2000 cal meal, i am talking about one, single serving TREAT that i would otherwise not keep in the house. PERFECT thank you.

Justwant2bhealthy I currently try to stick to 1550 which is weight loss for my goal. I do hot yoga 6 times a week, i am 23 and 5'8. according to maintenance levels for that, it is just over 2000 cals. This is a scary number to me, but I will adjust up, to about 1800. Minimizing allowable snacks is actually also a phenomenal idea, thank you. I am going to sit down and make a pre-portioned snack drawer. i try to be money-wise (which seldom works out) but i figure if i buy special baggies and maybe tie them all with ribbons, i won't feel like eating like 15 baggies, it will be too pretty (also time consuming). PERFECT

lin43 the day will one day come, when i can be as strong as you. I know all about the fridge door open/finger in the jar situation. sometimes i actually start with using a spoon or fork, then put it down into the sink, then eventually result to the fingers in the jar situation. irony? it's always all healthy food.

thank you so much for all of your insight chickies. this has been a wonderful list of eye opening replies to read, and a great realization that it is time to sit down, take a breath, and re-evaluate. maybe i can even be one of those mythical creatures that ups their calories and loses more? that would be awesome!

I've decided to give up trigger foods forever, maybe if I am 80 or something. Mainly because I like the sensation, but I hate how they make me feel - because they turn on that monster inside me, and I hate feeling like a slave to something.
Whenever I try to reintroduce and eat it in moderation (like most diet books say...but I guess they never really consider people who have trigger issues with certain foods) it screws me up.
I hate that the list is pretty big, and it kinda makes me Paleo (i dont hate that but its kinda funny). I am triggered by creamy and sugary foods - Beans (I find em kinda creamy LOL), wheat, rice, sugar (I only have it in sauces that have like 1-2 grams of sugar, and whatever is naturally found in vegetables)
I think its OK to have a "weird" relationship with food, even if its forever. A recovering cigarette addict or an alcoholic will never have a normal relationship with cigarettes and alcohol. As a binger, I will never have a normal relationship with food.
Is it certain foods that it hard for you to control portions?

@stimkovs

Hah, I think it's just the way I view shopping. If something is in my house, my mind jumps to, "Ooooh, that would be so good right now..." or "I could have just a little, I did well today, I could take a break, put on a movie, and snack..." I get comfy cozy, I get soft. But when I'm in the store, it's all business. I suppose it's the setting. I'm in the store, I'm not "house comfy", I'm not feeling overly emotional.

I don't know if I'll be of any help, but I'll try!
What I found that helps is to set yourself a goal..ex. if I lose x amount of pounds, I will treat myself to Burger King (or something like that). I have found that this really helps me. It makes me work harder to get to that goal, and it also gives me the chance to have something I really like. It helps the cravings a little.
Another thing that I do is I still eat the foods I love, I just create healthy versions of them. For instance, instead of greasy pizza (even though I love it), I make my own with pita bread, skim milk mozzarella cheese, and light ragu pizza sauce. I do this to a lot of foods that I love, and a lot of it tastes the same!
I used to have a problem with portion control as well. What I found that works is to have a salad or some fruit on the side and just give myself more of that so by the time I get to the main course, it fills me up.

WHEAT THINS. They are just so damn addictive. I, too, am unable to keep them in the house lest I devour the whole box in one sitting (unless I have laughing cow cheese to eat with them, then two sittings)

that's what i had to learn - i, too, was stuck in my little routines. "family movie night" just wasnt' family movie night without a trashcan pizza - that, for those who don't know, consists of an actual metal garbage can lid (clean and unused, obviously) then you put a layer of nacho chips, followed by layers of guacamole, sour cream, ground beef, monterey jack cheese, diced mixed sweet peppers, and repeat 2-3 times, then cover with foil and heat in the oven until the cheese melts. either that or it was an actual pizza with all the fixin's and extra cheese blend.

walking the dog *always* involved a stop at the coffee house for an extra-large latte macchiatto if i went one way, Tim Horton's and an extra-large with four cream if i went the other - i walk the dog twice a day minimum.

going for a stroll with my daughter, we ALWAYS bought penny candies. first it was just 25c worth, but finally i was buying the $2 baggie for me, the 50c baggie for her.

not following the routines was soooooooooo hard - not just for me, but also to explain to my daughter why we're not doing it this way any more - no more trashcan pizza, now it's trashcan popcorn (plain, popped stove-top, not the microwave stuff; and a bowl in the middle that was buttered or flavoured for her). no more tim horton's unless i'm getting a plain tea, no more lattés and REALLY no more candy - now we walk the other way toward the library and a treat is finding it actually open.

it was hard, but now the new routines are settling in and i'm seeing payoffs -the weight coming off my butt is going into my back pocket, lol.