Hello all,

I have never had a body image based in reality. I'd either not look in the mirror or what I did see did not coincide with reality. I'd see photos of me and think...is that what I look like? I dreaded getting photos at all.

As I have lost all this weight, I'd look in the full length mirror at home and think, 'oh this is a cheap mirror, it must be warped, I'm not that thin.' Then I was saw myself in another large mirror that I assume was not warped and I was actually stunned. I knew my clothing size was getting smaller, but I still had no idea of what a 'good' body would be for me.

I knew I was getting close to my goal, but the scale was not a good measure because I had all this left over skin with some fat clinging to it. After 145 pds lost, I was plateauing and losing hope, so I went to a plastic surgeon to get an idea of how many pounds to allow for that extra skin. He told me 20 pds, and that I should stop the diet now, that my 'corrected' weight would be fine for someone my size/age. That's what finally convinced me to start Phase 2.

I can not afford plastic surgery, and have heard that some of this skin will be absorbed by the body over time, with exercise. I'm hoping that works. I am 59, so my skin is not as elastic as it used to be.

I bet there many of us who have never had a 'realistic' body image and that affects our whole outlook on life, on the future, during the diet.

Thoughts?

First impression as I read your message, WOW, what an amazing woman! One hundred forty five pounds, literally I have tears in my eyes because I know how hard an accomplishment that is.

Second thought, give yourself a break. You look at the fact that you lost 145 pounds and must know that if you did that, you are capable of doing anything. Your body will absorb some of the skin and with excersize you will firm it up. I am 49 so I understand looking at loose skin knowing we don't quite have the bounce back of a twenty year old. But enjoy your life now because you have earned it! So what if you are little baggy, I bet you look awesome in your jeans. I bet you feel 110% better and are able to do things physically that were impossible for you before you lost the weight.

I don't know if I can make you feel better but you make me feel hope and inspiration. A year ago I though maybe women of our age couldn't do this. That was my excuse. So happy you and many other women on this chat have shown me this isn't true!

Love what you have, look in the mirror everyday and tell yourself how beautiful you are and then go out and have a great day! You are amazing.

I know exactly how you feel. I think I may have a form of body dysmorphic disorder - I don't see myself as "thin" (a relative term since I'm not technically thin) yet. The only time it hits me is when I'm folding my laundry. Even my husband makes comments about how small my pants are now. But I look at them and think it's impossible that I fit into them, when I look in the mirror and don't see someone that size. It will change over time. I've been big so long I guess I just can't get used to it yet.

And yeah, age plays a big factor. I start going to the gym on Monday - I didn't do much besides walking while on the diet. I have so much excess skin from weight loss it's disgusting. I am hopeful I can snap some of that back into shape by the summer. I ate a raspberry jello every day because the collagen was supposed to help - I didn't notice a difference at all. What I really needed was a stairmaster ;-)

I now understand why people have the surgery. I used to think that was a total sign of vanity. But being left with all the skin following the weight loss has been tough. And the cost is obscene - $3K for arms. Sounds like someone's feeding off our insecurities...

I also have had body image issues....in that I wasn't seeing myself as being as heavy as I really was! I posted this earlier today in the general support forum:

I am betting that you look fabulous, and that your skin WILL shrink as time goes on. So be patient and hang in there!

I have heard that compression garments can help retrain the skin, so maybe that is an option to look into as well?

First of all, a big congratulations to you. What a HUGE accomplishment! Second of all, I understand about viewing your body in an unrealistic way. I have been various weights as an adult from 115lbs to 180lbs and at any of those weights I have never been easily able to see the positive in the mirror. It doesn't have much to do with size at all, it's something going on with the mind. Sometimes I think its helpful that each tiime you look in the mirror instead of picking on yourself about something, point out one or two positive things like "man I have nice eyes" or "my thighs are big, but they are also so strong". The more positive reinforcement you give yourself, the more "normal" those thoughts become. Fake it til you make it! As far as plastic surgery, I'm supportive of the idea if it will make someone feel better. I'm not a fan of facial surgery so much, because I think you face is what identifies you, your body isn't. I'd say give it some serious time for the skin to absorb and see what exercise does. In the mean time you could start a fund for yourself, like say it is your tummy that bothers you the most you could have a tummy tuck fund and learn to love the other parts of you that bother you less. I'm sure to everyone else who sees you, you are a beautiful inspiration and you just need to work on allowing yourself to see what everyone else does <3

P.S- definitely not saying you need plastic surgery, I am just saying I know that it can be a great thing for some people especially after a huge weight loss. I don't judge either way!

You all are so kind. I really appreciate it. I do look pretty darn good in my jeans. It's just the hanging skin that is gross. I'm so amazed I got this far, that I will just enjoy cute clothes and will live with the skin for now. I can't afford surgery anyway. It was more a question of getting some idea of how many pounds to allow for the skin, as just plain total weight was not a good measure of when to stop losing pounds. I never thought I'd hear a doctor tell me I needed to stop losing weight. )

I do know it's recommended that you not do anything for two years after you lose weight to allow your body to absorb any loose skin and then see what you have left. I know my coach recommended eating the jello every other day, but Linden suggested that I use a higher quality gelatin. After doing some research I found a gelatin called Great Lakes gelatin. I found the product on Amazon and I put 2 tbl per day in my food. Not sure if it will help, but I have to say my nails are now rock hard and my hair stopped falling out.

I still have about 70 pounds to go, but hopefully with the exercise (and hopefully some gelatin) it won't be totally scary. My arms aren't horrible yet, but I am worried about the stomach and thigh area.