You're not the only one. I've lost and gained and failed for years but I won't give up. Just take baby steps. Dust yourself off and get back and keep going.

Been there, am there really. Losing weight is definitely a test of wills, I think constantly being fed up is part of the journey to making permanent changes. If you keep trying and pushing yourself, eventually it will stick!

It's only failure if you stop trying for good

DON'T PANIC

From your stats and your post, it looks like you've lost about 60 lbs. and kept it off for at least a year. That's not failure. That's quite an achievement, actually. Especially since you had to deal with a bunch of personal stuff. So go you!

I've been unsuccessful in keeping the weight off long-term all the previous times I've tried to lose. I don't always eat as well as I should or move as much as I should now, and it shows up on the scale and in how I feel. I tend to have long plateaus. A lot of people would probably consider those times failures. Sometimes I consider them failures, but I usually just think about them as being part of my weight loss journey that may not have moved me forward, but that I can usually learn from (mostly patience or what not to do). Most people probably go off-track or give up at one time or another - so you're not alone. I think that the key to getting past that is to keep on trying - which is what you've been doing. Have you been able to figure out why it's so hard for you to stay on-plan (emotional or food triggers, boredom, etc.)? Have you tried different strategies to help you out? If you've been actively seeking solutions (easier said than done, I know) and are patient, then you'll probably eventually hit on something that works for you. If you haven't, well - if you can, it might help get things moving again.

It sounds like your weight isn't controlling your life so much as your insecurity is controlling your life. Those are two separate issues. Insecurity isn't a weight issue. There are A LOT of "naturally" thin and "formerly fat" thin people who are insecure, and there are a number of fat people (including very fat people) who seem to feel very comfortable and confident in themselves. And, from what I've read on here and seen in real life, losing weight doesn't magically make feelings of insecurity or unworthiness go away. If you're tired of feeling insecure and self-conscious, then learning how to deal with those feelings might be a good thing to work on.

Yeeeeeeep. Been there. That was me for the last 4 years until this past July. I had literally gained and lost the same 10lbs for 4 years. I always ALWAYS on a friggen diet but not getting anywhere.
Finally, "something" clicked and now that I've lost 30lbs I feel I've come way too far to let anything screw it up now!
You can do it!!
Take it one day at a time.. if you screw up one day.. just get right back on track tomorrow and blow it off. Baby steps!!