I have always enjoyed reading about others and their struggles and successes and thought I would add my own story and hope for some encouragement along the way, even if I am the only one that reads this

A little background. I was a very thin child until I reached 11 or 12. I wasn't obese or anything, but definitly bigger than my classmates. One of the worst things for a kid is to feel out of place or different than other kids. I do remember a short time in 9th grade when I would exercise everyday and started eating less and lost about 20 pounds but I was still bigger than most other kids throughout the rest of my school life. I think I weighed 180 when I graduated. I am 5'5" and was pretty solid, but still uncomfortable.

I didn't go to college, but started working the summer I graduated from high school. That is basically how my life went for the next 9 or 10 years. I married at 21 and divorced at 24. I remarried at 27 and am still married to and supports everything I try and do.

When I was 19 I was told I couldn't have kids and had resolved to that fact and actually was fine with that. I wasn't one who became upset or wished I could have children. Low and behold though at 27 I had a son (you can add two and two together with the age I got married the 2nd time and figure it out, haha). I quit my job and am still a stay at home today. I love being a mom and even though he is now 7, we are still best friends

I weighed 270 when I went into the hospital to give birth. I joined weight watchers 2 months after having my son and lost about 12 pounds before quitting. I have joined a handful of times and everytime I lose 10-12 pounds before quitting again. So for the past 5-6 years I have yoyo'd between 218-230. The last time I weighed 218 was in 2007 and I have basically stayed in the 220's since then.

I really am hoping that with the advice and cheering from the rest of you that I can break the cycle. I LOVE food. I can't stress that enough. I joke that it's always there for me, but it really is true. Although after eating too much I hate it. I guess this what we will call a love/hate relationship!

So, here we go. It's the 4th of July and I want to change. I want to be healthier and not keep fooling myself that my weighing 227 is different than everyone else's and that I weigh too much, but am really healthy.

I try to eat organic/local when I can. I love to garden and love vegetables. So, I am going to start calorie counting and focus on trying to eat "mostly" whole foods.

Thanks for reading and hopefully I can do it this time!!

Hobbygardner. I wish you much success in your weight loss efforts and I look forward to reading about your success. I sure can relate to the love/hate relationship with food.

Welcome, Hobby! I love food, too...you are not alone!! It has been an emotional crutch, but one that calorie counting has taught me to let go of. Good luck on your journey!

Welcome Gardener. I'm a gardener too--it's amazing how many veggies you can eat from the garden and still have room for a nice piece of chicken. Makes eating a little more satisfying.

What I've found? I'm eating great nutritious food w/a few sweet snacks thrown in everyday. Find YOUR balance. You'd be surprised what you can eat.

You are very right, we really enjoy hearing different stories and struggles. We look forward to hearing and seeing you progress!
I am also on Calorie count with the same user name. The name suggests, that is where I count my calories!

Thanks for the warm welcome everyone!!

Emme: I read some of your journal and that is when I decided to try it as well as it hopefully will act as accountibility. Good luck as you reach your goal

ScottieMama: You are right. You can eat lots of veggies for a small ammount of calories. I love gardening and say it is a form of therapy for me!

I had friends over for the 4th last night and we had decided to keep the menu simple. Chicken on the grill with watermelon, capresse salad and a snack tray with shrimp, olives and cucumbers. The cucumbers were out of the garden. My son has picked 2 so far this season!

So, today is my official day. I watched what I ate yesterday more carefully than I have been, but didn't measure/weigh.

I will post what I eat and please feel free to suggest something I should do differently or substitutions for something that might be better than what I am having.

Something I didn't mention yesterday is that I have PCOS. I do not take meds for it and I have done low carb before, but then when the whole organic/know where your food comes from things kicked in for me, then the want for meat changed. I still eat meat, but less of it and mostly local.

Thanks again for the encouragement and welcome!