Yes, I have put a moo in my topic. I am not a cow, though I am fast approaching that status. Last night, Marcella slipped a chick pea into my salad. I drank a whole bottle of syrup of ipecac, but to no avail. I still feel bloated!
Marcella has been discharged from rehab and is a new person! I am so proud of her. She has cut down to just four Xanax a day and is limiting herself to pharmaceutical amphetamines only. This kind of growth brings tears to my eyes. She is speaking at the next league meeting, she is such an inspiration to us all.
We are concerned about this current resurgence of "perfection" talk among you. We feel it is cruel to discuss the topic when many of you are obviously hopeless. I remember posting my eating plan on many occasions, have any of you been able to follow it even for a day? I thought not. Please give up this sad quest. Accept yourselves as you are. What would be so great about being me if I wasn't being compared to poor schmucks like you?
SugP , 01-13-2003 05:03 PM
As usual, dear, dear Letty, you have left us all speechless.
*kiss kiss* to Marcella!
Dear Miss Letty:
I'm so excited to see your post! You seem like just the sort of person I would like as a mentor. I am all in favor of using pharmaceuticals to keep a slim and trim figure, and I'll bet you can help me out with some advice on which ones are right for me.
Would you be so kind as to detail your eating plan for your admirers?
SpandexMama
Wabby , 01-13-2003 07:13 PM
Miss Letty, I thought that you would appreciate my weight loss plan of slowly having all non vital organs removed. This week my gall bladder (those stones had to have been heavy), next week I could go in for my spleen and appendix, I'm sure a couple of ribs wouldn't be missed. How many ounces is in your tonsils???
I'm back at the office today. Only for a few hours because I don't want to let anyone get off easy. My DS's gf has been answering the phone while I was gone. She has changed my computer desktop, screen saver and even my cursor is a little weiner dog instead of an arrow. My entire computer now has a dog/puppy theme. DS was using his arm to pound on a storefront component last week instead of a rubber mallet. He gave himself a hairline fracture. He will have to be splinted and off work for 2 weeks. DH wants to use the rubber mallet on his head. We're way to busy here to spare him, but I guess we'll have to.
Peachezzzzzz!!!!! I'm so excited about your house!!! Tell us more.
Sugar, that's whats so wonderful about the ya-yas. All that hilarious tragedy. I laughed. I cried. ------ I just finished The Story of Lucy Gault now that's depressing. Just one big tragedy after another.
We had a Harry Potter weekend. Even though we have no young children. Out of boredom we rented the first movie. DH loved it (he really never did grow up) and the next day we had to go to "the chamber of secrets". However, I know for a fact there is no way he'll go to see a musical, so I need to find a friend to see Chicago. DH is trying the nicotine patches to help him quit smoking. This is day one. Pray for me.
I think spleens and tonsils are just too small to result in serious weight loss (though they would be a significant percentage of Letty or Marcella's weight.) It's worth a try, though.
