Okay i am at my wits end.. I know i know..Im supposed to be patient and wait for my order from Nashua...so i did my research and looked at medi-fast and opti-fast stuff...i was trying to find another possible shake out there that would be similar to IP and Medi-fast.. The closest thing i could find was Boost Diabetic..which i found at the store..Its high in carbohydrates...as in 16 grams and it wont put you into ketosis..but i thought..if just drink six of these shakes a day..it will give me exactly 1200 calories for the day and i could get my body accustomed for the first 3 days..of not "eating" much..so i get over the hunger issues before my shipment from nashua comes in..Well.bad news..it tastes awful..way over sweet with sucralose..terrible after taste..and on top of it..I still feel like an oompah loompah..
I hate my body..im desperate to try anything right now..But i feel like im bashing my head against a wall while i wait for my shipment to come in..(stupid postal strike)..
I look pregnant..thats how bad i look..and im talking like 7 months...and im not pregnant..which is the worst part..but i walk around acting pregnant so that people wont question wheather im just "fat" vs being "pregnant"..Cause if they cant tell..then i dont have to worry with them insulting me..Ever get that??? Someone comes up to you "how many months are you??" ...my response now "about six"....so i dont have to explain to them that i have gained so much weight.. i know its a defense mechinism in order to deal with peoples thoughts and comments on my body..But the truth is.. i just want to die..
Im mad that i have wasted about 50$ on shakes for 3 day that wont even work...i HATE my whey shake though..it tastes like..bleh..is the only word i have for it...
Im sorry..for having a pity and sounding so down in the dumps.. i just need encouragement..especially since im not getting any from my hunny or friends or family.


