As I get closer to goal I notice that a lot of things are really starting to get tricky. My biggest complaint isn't lowering my calories it's actually the fact that I can't put on muscle anymore atleast that's what it seems like. I use to get use to my workout routines fairly easily and I eat plenty of protein but now it's like it takes longer and longer for my body to adjust to changes and I haven't even been able to up my reps or weights in almost a month. It's frustrating because I need to lose the fat so I can't up my calories to build the muscle so I feel like I'm stuck.

I've also noticed that when I am bloated it makes a huge difference now. Before if I was bloated I didn't look that much different I just felt different now it's visible and you can see it in my face and how my pants fit. Makes me sad when I'm seeing progress and then I'll eat to much salt or my hormones act up and bam my progress appears to have disappeared.

Finally, I have no idea why but I'm starting to feel extremely socially awkward. I don't like the way people notice you more when your smaller and I feel like I'm being put under a microscope more and I don't know what to talk about since most of my time spent is on my weight loss, exercise, documentarys, meditation, and taking care of with my niece. In a weird way I find the new attention a little insulting and I don't know why. I think I prefered it when I didn't get many looks.

I cant answer a lot of those things, but I know why it takes much longer to lose it. Well, i don't know WHY, but don't worry, it's normal. My dad is having the same problem, he is having a hard time losing the last 10 pounds.

We are all behind you Hun'!

I am socially awkward as well. More people, mostly the men, are greeting me in the hallway now at work or striking up random conversations. My eyes immediately shift downward or I don’t really engage. I have been invisible for so long but now, with less of me, I am being seen. (Ironic, huh?) It’s causing some anxiety because I feel like I am on display. And what irritates me about it is that I want to ask them, “How come you didn’t ask me how my day was WHEN I WAS FATTER? Did you just assume all my days sucked? Is it less embarrassing to talk to me now? No longer afraid of what your guy pals will think? JERK!”

Well good for you for working out and your success so far! your gorgeous and unfortunately our society judges us on our looks.
I have to add about the getting looks cause your smaller. When I was younger I was disgusted at how guys look at girls. I was at goal back then and hated walking past a group of guys in the mall. I was teased when I was a kid and I guess it just stuck. Now males of any age look at women, I hate it too, I still get looks now even though I am a curvy over 40 woman. it disgusts me and I want to punch the guys in the face for it.

Hey girl keep your chin up and smile you just have a little ways to go....your doin great!!

On the weights... do you count how many reps you are doing? Do you do 2 or 3 sets? Perhaps you could do a higher weight the first set and lower weight the next set if you aren't ready for all three sets to be the higher weight.

Salt bloat is always temporary!

I was more socially awkward at my biggest weight... but, I know I feel n awkwardness. Sometimes I feel like people at the gym most think I am a big loser that I spend so much time there! Oh well, working out makes me happy so I go twice a day sometimes.

exactly!

I do 2 sets of 20 reps full body every 2-3 days with 10-15lb hand weights. I wanna get up to three sets but every time I try I end up being sore for a few days which I took to be a good sign but it wasn't any easier the next time around so I've just been keeping it to two sets.

Here is the thing about gaining muscle.

For a while you can do it in a caloric deficit. These are called "newbie gains". What is happening is your body is partitioning calories towards muscle gain as an adaptation to the new stimulous. After a period of time (which varies depending on genetics and how much fat you have) you will no longer be able to make muscle gains in a caloric deficit.

So congratulations - your newbie gains have expired. Now weight lifting will burn calories and help retain the muscle you've gained. If you want to gain muscle you will now need to be in a caloric excess.

The simple fact is unless you want to use steroids you cannot lose fat and gain muscle at the same time once your newbie gains are over.

If you enjoy lifting you can continue doing it 3x a week but to retain muscle you really only need to hit a bodypart hard once per week. Just something to think about.

Goodluck!

Perhaps try 3 sets of 15 reps?

I don't believe in this "newbie" gain. I think you can build stronger and more muscles now. You and I have had similar weight loss and I continue to build muscle- but I work with a trainer 3X a week.

yeah i figured that was the problem. don't know if reaching that point is a good thing or a bad thing though. do you think it would be best to just maintain it now and then try to get a little under goal and then focus on building the muscle up? or should i try to mix it up like do one month strength training eating a little over maintance and then one month weight loss focusing on cardio back and forth until i reach goal?

WOW. thats fairly similar to where I am

for the last 6 months my diet has been fairly strict, to lose fat, but now I am wanting more strength but fear adding food to build that muscle. I also find some days I get fairly light headed when doing strenuous excercise as well.

Bloating as well is an issue for me, when bigger PMS bloating never worried me, the scales would say I was bloated (I can gain 3-5kg in bloating) but I never noticed it. NOW its really noticeable and really upsets me (even though I know its hormonal).

Socially I hate being noticed or asked.. wow you've lost weight , when I was big I was invisible socially, now it seems I wear neon lights above my head, it is very hard to deal with, and with that I am trying to take baby steps, if a situation is too hard emotionally, i will find an excuse and leave.

I do believe in the newbie gains, as I have hit a point I cannot increase my strength while on a strict diet I do believe I need more fuel now, but fear that , as once I start adding more fuel in my brain goes nuts and starts the binge cycle I lived in for years.
I suppose I have to start trusting myself. Once I get to 172 pounds (my upper weight limit i have set for the rest of my life... I plan to start tweaking my diet and looking at what works for me. I am a martial artist and I do need to improve my strength. And if i notice gains (non muscle) I will be tweaking some more. I think everyone takes a while to find what works for them once they hit a maintance weight.

@icedragon6669 glad i'm not the only one. i felt like it was a really weird combination of things to be worried about at the same time. lol.

It's not a weird combination at all to be worried about! It takes time and patience to adjust both mentally and physically to your new shape and all the changes it brings.