Hi,

I am going to move on from living in my own small appartment to sharing a flat with three other students.
Now, my binging is almost under control but when things get stressfull, I do still binge.
I wonder how living together with others is going to influence this problem. I just cannot imagine stuffing myself like that in front of them. I am kind of afraid that I might end up binging in my bedroom or when no one is home. I usually just eat enormous amounts of my healthy food since I don't buy candy or fast food, but what if I'd start buying cookies just to have something to eat in my room? It's really about the eating for me, not about the food. I stuff myself till I feel uncomfortable full and this uncomfortable feeling makes me forget the stress or fear that I was feeling before.
And at the same time, there is a little voice saying "Hey, maybe that is going to solve the problem!" I mean, if I just don't keep food in my bedroom and just try and get into a habit of only eating in the living room (there's no table in the kitchen), maybe I'll stop overeating because there is no occasion to overeat.
also, I often binge because I'm tired after a long day of classes. Or I would study and then get scared that I won't pass the next test and I would binge to calm myself down. Or just to get a break. Here at my appartment there is no one to just talk to for a few minutes (I would call friends, but that's not the same as talking to someone in person). So it seemed to me (subconcously, I think) that the only way to get a break was to eat.

Does anybody have any experience with a situation like this? I mean moving in with someone after having lived by oneself before?


I do realize that there are probably other underlying issues that cause the binging and that those won't be solved by sharing a flat.

Hi hun, take a deep breath and relax. You are focusing on all the things that could go wrong and are unable to see things that go right. I have lived in different houses with different students and it has been fine! Really it has been, just be who you are.

You are the most important person you know, do not harm yourself with food... yes even when you are stressed, don't make stress there where it just isn't. Do not do things because you think other will judge you or anything like that, you are allowed to do what it good for you, to eat healthy food, to be good! Take this as a challenge that will help you grow!

Talk to your housemates when you are stressful... and the people you are going to meet... maybe you can help them maybe they can help you. My housemates were supportive when i was trying to lose weight i even had buddies to exercise with. It was awesome. We were cooking healthy food together. My current housemates - even better - such health freaks, both weight less than I do. It is fantastic! There is no binge food around as we are all healthy. I don't feel that anybody's bad habits can rub onto me, it is other way around! and i did not know them before i started living with them.

It is just another opportunity for you to grow, to move on, there might be challenges but when you go through them, you will be pleased! Like my challenges to go to mothers house and stay there without binging. It happened eventually! It happened! Next binge free challenge- my holiday to France! It can happen! There must be a way and I will do it!

It depends on who you live with and how they eat. If you live with fellow bingers or big eaters it could be really tough to get by without succumbing to the "social overeating" trap. If they are fairly healthy in their eating habits it might make things easier for you.

Hi,

thank you for your posts! I really need to try not to overobsess about this issue. I AM looking forward to moving more than anything at the moment.

I don't know how they eat yet. They said "healthy". But "healthy" can mean many things (and they're all men and I suspect that healthy for them is something else anyways) . They cook together sometimes and try to have breakfast together on sundays. I like that idea, but at the same time it sounds like a "social overeating trap".
Well, I can't do anythign about it right now anyways. So maybe I'll just wait till I move and then see how things go.

They are men... awesome, you should have started from there. I don't mean to generalise too much but most men i know are so carefree when it comes to food and so not obsessed and just stop eating when they are full even if there is food around. I love eating with them. They are less picky and less complicated. Not all of them of course but most I have met are so mentally healthy about food. Why social overeating trap? Why don't you overcome that?

I have been eating in the school canteen since Jan at least 7 times a week with no overeating. It can be done. You just learn that you eat when you are hungry and you stop when you are full. Food is not to be eaten because there are people around no matter what. No matter what. Even if it tastes nice... put yourself and what is important to you first. You will have to learn to eat in social environment. It is great when you overcome it!

I had my first even 3 course meal in a restaurant last week and did not overeat. I did not think that it could happen to me! But it is possible! The freedom is amazing and the new habits too! Just trust that you can do it! Trust in yourself! It can be done!

I never closely observed men's eating habits actually. But it's true that most of my male friends don't seem to think much about food. And they've never been on a diet, as far as I know.
Yeah, it would be great to be able to just stop eating when I'm full. I'll try my best.