Today I'm faced with my first potential roadblock since getting serious about weightloss.

I'm living in Japan where drinking parties are a critical part of office culture. Basically, important events are followed by a drinking party with the other teachers at my school. Participating in the parties is a major part of integrating into an office or job; for many Japanese the drinking parties are the only time that they show their true feelings to the co-workers. They're really indispensable, professionally and personally.

My concern is this: tonight is my first drinking party this year. I fully plan to drink plenty of water and, if I can, eat a fiber-rich snack before this party to curb my hunger. But does anyone else have other tips for dealing with a situation like this where I will be sat down and expected to eat and drink for the duration of the party? Even just mental tricks to help me stay on track would be appreciated. I'm going to have a lot more of these parties this year and I want to be prepared.

This is what my mom told me in high school about parties where there would be drinking: nurse your drink, and if you want to take it in the bathroom with you and dump some down the sink or toilet and refill with water. I used to do that with my beers at parties. (I'm sorry, but even in High School I knew that Bud Light tasted gross!)

Talk so much that you don't have time to drink or eat?

I notice that when I'm having dinner with a friend that I haven't seen for a while, I can completely forget to eat because I'm catching up with her on everything that I've been doing. And it's only later that we both exclaim "Gosh, we haven't eaten a thing!" and then try to eat something before the waiters get impatient with us!

I don't know if it will work in your situation, though.

Thanks for the quick responses, ladies!

I'll definitely do my best to nurse my food and drink and strike up lots of conversation. Sounds like a good way to get closer with my colleagues and save some calories. I think the hardest part will be not drinking to get tipsy/drunk. I enjoy drinking and I think that not going too far will be even more difficult than eating a normal portion of dinner.

Drink oolongcha instead of beer, or if you go for alcohol and they have chu-hai made from oolongcha or whiskey/water drink that.

I've just been...not going to my enkais this year. Worst employee ever.

I'm teaching in Korea and having a similar problem. The difficult thing is that I do value these get togethers. When it comes to calories from alcohol I don't even know where to begin. Sometimes I just let them go, especially when I've been rigid with myself all week long. They say it's good to mix up the calorie intake sometimes, right? Plus you always weigh less after a night of drinking! (Dehydration, totally fake.)

Please, don't listen to me. Just know that I've been there/am there.

You do not "have" to drink because you are "expected" to drink. Many people do not or cannot drink alcohol, regardless of the occasion. Don't allow social pressure to dictate what you do.

Jay

i have encountered the same problem teaching in korea. Some of the female korean teachers at my school taught me a trick that works every time: The drink of choice at these work get togethers is soju. A clear alcohol that looks like vodka but tastes ten times worse. When it's time to toast, take your shot and then "chase" it with water but actually spit the alcohol into your water glass.

For the dinner we usually go to a korean barbeque place and there are always lots of veggies and soups as side dishes so I usually stick to those.

Good Luck!

I lived and worked in China for 4 years, where I believe the work/drinking culture is similar to Japan, although I've heard drinking in Japan is even MORE intense than China. Yikes!

Oh, I wish Jay's comment were true all over the world! But frankly, culutrally speaking, it's not. And it burden is on those who are living in a foreign culture to assimilate or at least adapt. That's one of the side effects of living in a foreign culture. I could not drink while in China for various reasons, including medical. Most people understood, eventually, but work and friend relationships were hurt once or twice because of it. It was sad to me, and on those occasions I wish more than anything I could have just taken the stupid drink.

I think your event is over now. But I just want to share what worked for me as far as parties: Always have food in your chopsticks. Always look like you're chewing. Bring your cup up to lips often, but don't sip. Always look like your reaching for more food.

I realize those all sound ridiculous, but they worked for me! There was a lot of acting going on at my work parties, and I still came home fuller than I wanted, but it was better than doing nothing!

I'm not saying that making the choice is not without repercussions. But I am saying that it is wrong to do something you do not wish to do because of cultural "norms" and pressures. Suppose you were in a culture where all women were expected to sleep with their boss? Or eat pets as food? Where would you individually draw the line with that?

I do not drink alcohol, and I will not drink alcohol. My reasons are irrelevant, but it is a matter of spiritual beliefs plus medical issues. It is up to others to have their reaction, whatever it is. If a friendship is damaged because I don't drink, then it is probably not a friendship I want anyway. If I lose my job because I don't drink, then I probably don't want that kind of job. And if I'm in a culture where I am required to drink to fit in, guess what? I will not fit in! But my values are more important to me.

Maybe this comes with age--I'm just not willing to do things counter to my own ethics to fit in.

Jay

If I was living there, in their country, I'd sleep with my boss and eat Guinea pig. I, personally, draw the line at pushing my beliefs on people while I'm in their country or their home. I don't expect to go to a Vegan's house and get lamb stew or even go to my father's house and have him respect that I don't eat pork most of the time. My beliefs are simple respect for others when you are in their country or home. The thing is, HOWEVER, why would I go to a culture that totally violates my senses if I went knowing I would completely be offended or offend those hosting me?

When in Rome...... What happens in Vegas.....

It is what it is. When we travel to other countries, we should respect their cultures and not put our demands on those hosting us. That is why so many other countries feel as though we as Americans are arrogant because we refuse to learn foreign languages or adapt to others' cultures when we go to their countries.

I think this, plus the expectation of other cultures to assimilate to North American practices is so INCREDIBLY true. We don't want to practice cultural differences in other countries when we go, but we expect other people to conform when they come here.

I've been to China myself but not Japan and hung around Chinese families. NOT drinking isn't imposing your belief on someone. I mean you can drink _something_ but it doesn't need to be alcohol.

Really, Jesse Taylor? I mean, REALLY? Well good for you!

I agree with nelie, and I think the implication that somehow my not drinking alcohol is imposing my values (which, by the way, are hardly North American!) on others is just wrong. I don't insist that other people do not drink--that's completely up to them. I don't insist that they take on my values. Nor should they insist that I take on theirs.

I do not have to put anything in my body that I don't want to. That includes alcohol, drugs, and food. Now, if they are going to hold me down and force me, that's a different matter and a violation of human rights.

Jay

Agree 100%,