The first of the month in my head is always an indication of how the month will be. I know its crazy! So the first was ok, not a great on plan day but ok. The last 13 days have been the same, not on plan just ok. Last night I ate well and then had a couple of M&M',s. I know its not a bad thing since I have reached my goal weight but I hate when I go off plan. IT makes me so mad that October was awesome and now so close to the holidays I'm so bad.
I don't even think about it I just reach into the candy jar and grab candy, why?
My mother is visiting from overseas and I tend to eat more when she is here cause she makes the best food.
I hope to start over on the 15th of the month, its a Monday so perhaps I can start over. I am so mad at myself right now. I hate myself for not having any control. It seems like once I reach my goal weight I find every reason to sabotage myself. I feel like such a looser!

I absolutely know how you feel. I do the same thing to myself. The minute I reach a new low weight, something seems to snap & suddenly I want to eat everything that I've made "off limits" during my weight loss efforts.

So, I think the challenge for us isn't actually one of self-contol. I think it is one of deprivation. We clearly feel that we sacrifice & deprive ourselves to get to whever we are going. So to combat this, I am working on factoring in some of those "off limits" foods with regularity. Probably not every night, but a few times a week? That way M&M's aren't actually something I cannot have, but instead, something that is on plan - maybe not today, but maybe tomorrow. Know what I mean?

Don't beat yourself up. It is hard when you have company in town. I never want to be viewed as "different" or make anyone uncomfortable. You feel how you feel - I can't say anything to make you feel differently. But feelings are not always to be trusted. When I make self-defeating statements to my therapist, she always says something like "That is one thought. Have another one." It seems so simple, and at first made me a little angry. But over time, it has really stuck.

Maybe it will help you, too.

Perhaps always thinking in terms of "on plan" and "off plan" is not the best approach. What if you thought about your diet or food plan as fluid as life is? I mean life goes on, no matter what we do or don't do. Every day is it's own unique eating experience and not a do or die thing.

I find that keeping an eye on my averages over time help me keep eating choices in perspective. It's a balancing act and life situations, like your mother visiting means you need to make choices that you might not face otherwise.

Just throwing an idea out there for you. Hope you find that November can still be a great month!