That's it. Today is the day I start to live again.

I've had enough of the hamster wheel, running in circles, being good, being bad, and staying the exact same size. I'm tired of living a mediocre life in a mediocre body, tired of withdrawing myself from social situations because I feel insecure in my "fat" clothes. I want to wear my "fit" clothes again and feel good, feel carefree and always ready for spontaneous adventures. And special occasions.

I signed up with my old personal trainer. If anything, I'm hoping he'll hold me accountable with weekly weigh-ins and support. I've worked with him before, and lost the same 20 pounds twice. This is the third time I've regained all the weight I've lost, and I'm ready for it to be the last time.

I'm going to start drinking at least 2 liters of water a day, more on workout days. I'm going to start off by eating 3 meals a day, and a protein shake on workout days. Then I'll gradually start incorporating snacks. I lift weights a couple times a week, and I run long-distance a few times a week. Sometimes I do sprints or stairs, and sometimes I do Jillian Michael's "Banish Fat Boost Metabolism" video. I am very active and in shape, and I have no problem working out almost everyday of the week.

My problem is overeating. I am a stress-eater, a long-time binge-eater and a carb-a-holic. I am also very much a black-and-white thinker, which I hope to work on. Weekdays I'm great, usually, and Friday rolls around and I start snacking on a piece of junk there, a chocolate here, and before I know it I've set myself up for a full-blown binge at night which sometimes turns into a full weekend.

I am a preschool teacher, and the mental + physical exhaustion definitely leads to eating junk. Especially midday, when the staff room table is covered in cookies, chocolates, candies from co-workers and parents of the kids. Also, I am guilty of eating an extra school lunch sometimes on top of my own packed lunch, when a child is absent.

Anyway, I just wanted to make a statement here, and start posting more often. I have 20 pounds to lose.

Thanks and I'm excited to be here!

good luck!! Looking forward to seeing around

Another Japan poster! Welcome!

Isn't omiyage the worst? Luckily my office are quite stingy with the cookies so it's not too bad.

chickennugget! Oh, another person living in Japan -- double my jealousy now. What part of Japan are you in?

Your phrase "stress eater, long time binge-eater, carb-o-holic" completely describes me as well. Having a plan helps with the stress, and I've managed to up my protein by incorporating more eggs and cottage cheese into my diet. But the binges... ugh.

Keep posting -- you can do it!

Ditto, ditto and ditto! You will get there. Stay strong!

Hi all and thanks for the replies! sorry for the delay, I didn't see them until just now.

krampus - oh i know, every time someone goes somewhere, there's a giant box of SUGAR on the table in the staff room. It's sooo hard to resist, especially at around 4pm when I'm tired, cranky and hungry... when I go somewhere, I'm gonna bring back a ziplock bag full of cucumber sticks... LOL

same7lbs - I live in the Kansai area, near Kobe & Osaka. born and raised in Japan, but half American, lived in the US for almost 10 years before I moved back here last year. thanks for your support!

I'm gonna try and post more in the threads because I really need some support right now...

Awwww welcome!! I've always wanted to visit Japan. I heard its so beautiful!!

Welcome and good luck!!!

Wow chickennugget! I can relate to many parts of your post. Like you, I have gained and lost more times than I like to admit. The eating part is the problem for me as well, not the exercising! I am really hoping to put an end to this!!!
Good luck!