So you fantasize about being thin and about the clothes you are going to wear. Then you buy the right foods, the exercise equipment, the exercise clothes and the cute water bottle. Your Ipod now has walking, running and cool down music for your body training sessions. There is a goal outfit on a hanger hanging from your bedroom door and a picture of your fat self posted on the refirgerator door.

You made room in the family room for your dvd workout sessions and your new sneakers are ready for war.

Now my questions is... WHY CAN'T I GET IT DONE?? I have everything but a constant resolve to finally change my life and be the person I really am inside.

Your resolve doesn't have to be constant. It just needs to last long enough for you to do a half hour workout. You may not want to do this, but if you feel you need to do it, you will. I don't want to do laundry, but I have to.

And now that I've given you the "tough love", here's hug. I sure don't want this to sound harsh, but motivation is over rated, persistance is what you really need.

Persistence and a plan. Don't try to wing it--map out what you want the next few weeks to look like, both in terms of diet and exercise. Don't just plan to "make good choices"--think out exactly what you are going to eat, how and when you are going to buy, prepare, and store it, and when you are going to eat it. Do the same for exercise--don't just plan to "work out"--have some really specific plans for what, where, and when. Then, as you go, tweak all of these. But plan, plan, plan.

it sounds to me, and I am saying this from my experiences really, that you might be psyching yourself out before you start.

for instance: WHY CAN'T I GET IT DONE?? I have everything but a constant resolve to finally change my life and be the person I really am inside.

you've already done a bunch of work to change your habits, give yourself credit for that. you've set up your environment and have started planning.

once you get a couple of workouts under your belt, and a meal, two meals, a day, two days of eating better (even of just not eating or drinking something that was a deal breaker for you before), you'll feel better.

It's not why CAN'T you get it done - because you CAN, it's why WON'T you get it done.

For me, I needed a burning desire COUPLED with WILLINGNESS. I was finally WILLING to do what was necessary and what was required. Period. You have to be WILLING to change your life. You have to be willing to pass up on the high calorie/high quantity foods. You have to be willing to eat the healthy foods. You have to be willing to exercise. You have to be willing to make this a priority. You have to be willing to tell yourself no again and again and again. You have to be willing to work through the initial, temporary discomfort of establishing new healthy habits..You have to be willing to make this work, some how, some way. Because you have a burning desire to do so. And this is now a top priority in your life.

Losing weight and lots of it is a doable thing, for every one and any one, yourself included. People ask me all the time how I lost soooo much weight when they can't even lose 10 lbs and I tell them very simply - "that I decided to'".

DECIDE to do this. COMMIT to doing this. Be WILLING to do WHATEVER'S NECESSARY TO MAKE IT HAPPEN - and it WILL be done. You don't have to be fat if you don't want to be. You DO have the power to change this. You absolutely can be a slim, trim healthy weight. Push yourself. Challenge yourself. Reach. Stretch. Strive. Push yourself and push yourself. Grow. Prosper. Transform your life.

And oops one more thing - set yourself up for success. Plan. Plan. And then plan some more. Stick to that sucker like glue. LIKE GLUE. Don't make it an option TO veer from that plan. Stock up on healthy, healthy, delicious foods. GET RID OF THE JUNK. And than - plan some more. Failing to plan is planning to fail.

You CAN do this. And you should, you really, really should. Once you get into it (& give it some time), you will see it's not all that difficult and you will wonder why in the world you didn't do it sooner.

Make a schedule? and stick to it?

No, really!

You may unconsciously still be thinking of this new way of living as something you'll do "when you have the time." That time will never come unless you give it priority! You have to schedule in your exercise time just like you would a doctor's appointment, a car service appointment, a trip to the dentist. Same with your meal and snack times.

Get a calendar and stick it on the fridge, or use your iPod or date book or whatever other scheduling tool you use. Fill it out a week at a time, and treat those tasks like they are immovable, unchangeable commitments.

Good luck! You've got everything else it takes!

Jay

You can do this. Ignore your head (it is not about thinking but doing) and put one foot in front of the other. If you trip, get back up, and put one foot in front of the other. Lather, rinse, repeat.

You can do this. Don't waste so much time in your head psyching yourself out, beating yourself up, etc. Just do. I know you can. If your plan isn't working, change it or get a new plan, but don't stop.

Planning is absolutely essential. I always say to plan, plan and plan some more. Write down your plan in your journal and follow that plan. If your food plan is already figured out, then you don't need to have those food thoughts spinning through your head all day. Make time to suceed - shop for the healthy foods, set aside time for movement/exercise, and take time to work on the things that will be helpful in the long run.

It's not just the food...it's 'living' with food. Enjoy what you eat...taste it and don't hurry quickly through the meal.

Remember - a long journey begins with only one step. You don't have to lose every pound in a week. Take it a day at a time. You CAN suceed! Remember to give yourself credit for the things you are doing well in your journey.

So glad you posted.

Like others have said, it's a matter of doing the new activity (whatever it is) often enough that it becomes habit.

I highly recommend "The Four Day Win", which deals with weight loss and lifestyle change from a change management perspective. The "four days" is the time it takes for something to become something integral to you. For instance, if I lift weights once, "I've tried it". If I lift weights two or three times, it's something "I've done". Once I've lifted weights four times, I begin to think of myself as "a weight lifter". It's a mental shift in how you look at the thing (whatever it is that you're trying to do/change).

The idea they propose is to take baby steps. You've probably already started on this without realizing it. Vow to yourself that for the next four days you'll do... something so ridiculously easy that you KNOW you'll be able to do it. LIke put on your running shoes and tie them. nothing more. Just tie them. You say "Of course I can do that!". So do it. And when you have that "win" done, build on it. For the next four days, put on your running shoes and go outside. That's it. (whatever you feel you absolutely CAN do for four days... that's the "trick"). Eventually, you'll be putting on your running shoes, going outside, and walking for ten minutes. Then fifteen. then 30. Or whatever your goal is.

I know for me, this was eye-opening, even if it sounded stupidly simplistic at first. I'd always think that if I didn't do a full 45-minutes of my exercise video, I was a failure. Or if I didn't do at least 30 minutes on the elliptical, I might as well give up. Breaking it down into smaller portions, things that were completely and utterly "do-able", even on my laziest days, made it MUCH easier to get into the habit of getting ready to exercise.

Now I don't think about it much. I just get on the elliptical and put in whatever TV series DVD I'm currently watching, and start going. I know that my aim is to do all 45 minutes, but my "absolutely able to do every day" goal is 20 minutes. That way I don't fail on days when I stop after 20 minutes, but I'm still working toward going the full 45.

Thanks guys! I seem to be on an up and down roller coaster lately. I do great for a week and then I don't want to go for my walk or turn on the dvd player. Then I sit and cry!

I have to do this!

If the exercise is the stumbling block, stay focused on the food. Exercise has amazingly positive benefits, but weight loss is nearly all food.

If you can't do everything perfectly, food is the place to put your energies. Get one thing going right, then try to add in more. It's tough to jump in with all guns blazing.

Personally, I hate exercise and have been a sporadic, lackadaisical exerciser for 6 years. I am not particularly proud of it, but hey - it is the truth. I lost weight and maintain with minimal exercise.

Foodwise - I'm very careful and on plan.

Along with what everyone else has said, try journaling. It might help if you write down what you feel when you have those moments where you don't want to stay on plan. You may figure out what is triggering you. In doing so, you may be able to figure out how to prevent those triggers or at least recognize them when they are happening and handle them more efficiently.

No, you have to do something, but what you are doing--whatever the plan is--is NOT the right plan for you, or at least it's not the right plan right now. The problem isn't you, it's the plan.

I agree with Glory: exercise can wait, or do much, much less. I started with under 5 minutes at a time, and it took six months to get to the twenty minutes I thought I "should" be doing when I started. But now I do an hour at a time, and it's EASIER than that first 5 minutes was last August.

Don't do anything that makes you cry to think about. Find healthy choices that you like. Suffering does NOT burn fat. Small changes are fine, if you stick with them.