Is it horrible that i want to lose weight to make sure i can have an amazing guy??? I know it shouldnt matter because its whats on the inside but in my generation it has a lot to do with looks.

Thats not the only reason but part

It's one of my main reasons. And no, I don't think it's horrible. Everyone wants to find someone.

A truly amazing guy would love you at any weight.

But, I don't think there's anything wrong with vanity as a motivator, whatever works.

I don't think it's wrong as a motivator... but if you have to lose weight to find a good guy... the guys you're looking at aren't worth your time.

As said above, an amazing guy will love you at any weight. Vanity is a great motivator though, just make sure you are also losing weight for yourself. Losing it for someone else is not a good idea.

Look at the stupid things guys do to get laid, never mind the other benefits (you know, bug killing). I think it's messed up that we aren't supposed to care. There are much worse motivations to do something.

I don't know, it's kind of tricky losing weight for a guy. If you already know a guy and have perused him as a heavy chick and he's not interested, then losing weight to try and catch him is a pity in my eyes. First and foremost, so many people fail at maintaince, and regain their weight, how many guys bail at the first signs of weight relapse? (Many) Not worth the torture in my eyes. No man is worth that. One of my favorite expressions comes from Marilyn Monroe. She says, "If you can’t handle me at my worst, then you sure as **** don’t deserve me at my best."

BUT...taking off a few pounds to catch a new man who has never seen you at your worst...well that's a little different. Just remember though, at some point you need to be honest with them and tell them your history, because again, the percentage of people who maintain a weight loss is VERY low, and I know MANY women who have gained massive amounts of weight BACK after catching the "man of their dreams" only to find out that they don't like fat women.

Taking some pride in your yourself isn't vain. Everyone wants to look their best and most people want to be neat, clean, attractive. Vanity is when you get conceited about it and take it to extremes. So no, I don't think it is horrible to want to look your best and have it motivate you.

As for finding amazing guy --- I'm not sure what "amazing" is to you but I'm sure someone is out there to fit your specs. Get out there and search!

A.

Thanks ladies. I havent met anyone yet. But i totally agree that he should like me as i am. I just feel like fat people tend to settle for all they can get. im not attracted to very heavy guys so i dont expect them to be either. thank you for everyones comments.