So, this is kind of off topic and barely coherent, but I just got in a fight with the boyfriend. It's the first real fight we've had in the year we've been together, and it was over something completely stupid that I'm not going to get into. Unfortunately, he is in Mobile, and I am in Chattanooga, which is about a 7 hour difference until tomorrow when we both go back to school in Tuscaloosa, so the fight happened over the phone and now I'm alone in my room in my parents' house at 4 AM. Usually, when I get upset, I get an urge to binge. Right now, though, my stomach is actually growling. Usually I eat when I'm hungry but I am afraid to because I don't even know if it's real hunger-- I don't trust my own body to tell me. Is it normal to have real hunger after a huge emotional swing like this? I'm going to fill up on water and go to bed for now as I have already had all my calories, but should I actually eat next time? Thanks, guys. You have no idea how much you really help me.

First off . It's never fun getting into fights with loved ones, especially over the phone.

As for the hungry issue, if it's been a long time since your last meal you might be physically hungry, but from what you've written it sounds like you're just emotional (I call it 'mental hunger'). It's normal for a lot of us to feel 'hungry' when we're extra emotional.

I was an emotional/overeater, and basically anytime I felt an emotion I ate (especially stress). A major part of my weight loss journey has been to learn the difference between physical hunger and mental hunger. Mental hunger is difficult to deal with because it feels so real. After changing my lifestyle I had to learn to tell the difference between mental hunger and physical hunger. Generally these days I eat on a schedule, if it's not my mealtime and I'm hungry I try to examine why I'm hungry...usually it's because I'm emotional or even bored. I just distract myself until mealtime or if I'm really hungry then I'll have a small snack or move my mealtime up. Being 'mentally' hungry is miserable because it feels so real. Try and distract yourself until your mealtime or have a small healthy snack. Stay strong!

Fight or flight response is what I am guessing. Here's an article about hunger.

http://www.enotalone.com/article/3777.html

If the last time you ate was 3 or 4 hrs ago, have a sensible snack.

But if it was recent, you probably want to gnash your teeth on crunchy things or chewy things because you are still angry with BF and have an urge to "chew him out" still.

A.

Well, the answer is kind of a yes and a no.

YES YES YES my hunger goes through the roof when I am upset, especially when I am angry or frustrated. But, is it really hunger? No. It is emotional hunger, and sometimes my body does act like it is physical hunger. I can tell the difference because it may occur close to when I ate last, etc. Also, when I get hungry due to not eating for over 4 or 5 hours, then my stomach gets these weird little pains. Like ow, oww, owww! Weird, I know.

But, rest assured that yes, our bodies will at times have hunger be a mechanism of dealing with stress or anger.

Be strong, you can overcome it or learn to manage it.

I have noticed that since I have started eating better, and cannot lean on foods for comfort, I am feeling things a lot more intensely. Kind of like being in a semi-pms mode. Not cool. But I am hoping that it will pass as my body adusts to not being able to seek comfort in food.

I use to mistake anxiety as hunger. If I am really upset, I can't eat. My stomach feels like a knot. If I am anxious, feeling things are out of control, panicky, on edge, then I would slam into food to calm myself. I have learned to ride emotions now, I am not so quick to turn to food. Especially since I know what real hunger is, and it's different than anxiety. In the past, it was AFTER an emotional crisis that I would eat...when my emotions were released. Hope that makes sense.

I have a major case of the irritables right now, and not quite sure why unless maybe it is a hormonal fluctuation thing. Coincidentally, I am super duper hungry and hoping that the lunch I brought will hold me over. I forgot to take out food to cook tonight, so I will have to buy something cheap AND healthy on the way home.

I am trying to not feel discouraged in my weight loss. I am happy that even though I ate a variety of foods this weekend, I still tried to stick with only eating certain types of foods. I think I am a bit dehydrated as my tummy has not been very nice to me lately. I am thinking that if everything was ok with my tummy, then maybe I would show a larger amount of weightloss?

It is hard to not get discouraged because there are a couple of people in my situation who just get along so well. I tried for so long to get to know a certain person and just be super friendly and polite, and she always looked irritated or uninterested. A new person arrived, and she and her are fast friends. It wouldn't be an issue if it weren't for the fact that because of this person's inability to relate to me, she doesn't see that I am able to do certain things, and she focused her energy on helping the new person to get certain priveleges. It is upsetting because the new person has already started to renig on certain responsibilities, and is very vocal about not being terribly invested in this situation. Yet, I have tried to do everything possible to show my level of investment, and I just get treated like the fat person that they want to put in the back of the scene, ya know? Sigh.

I need to just take all of that negative energy and just keep focused on me and what I need to do to make myself better and healthier and happier. I really worry about life passing me by and my becoming old and bitter. I feel that I need to be needed and wanted and helpful for me to feel like I have some meaning in this world.

Milliondollarbbw - I often feel the same way, overlooked because of my weight and having such a desire to have a life worth living.

I am not willing to let the second half of my life pass me by. Don't let the first half of yours end up in regrets. Take hold of life and live it!

thank you, three herring. I have found that I sometimes feel that way. I do want my life to be happier and one where I feel that I am more me, than just someone inside this body that people just seem to not understand. Sigh.