Let me first apoligize if I am coming off as whiny, b*tchy, ungrateful etc. I don't mean to. I realize I am so blessed and so fortunate to have the weight loss I've had. I know what I am doing in the long run is for better health and just a better life. I am just currently feeling a mix of confused, irritated, and just plain tired in regards to my weight loss journey with MRC. Its not the center, its just pretty much me and my waning motivation for the food I am eating and not wanting to exercise anymore (I started out doing 5x a week now I am at about 2x, maybe 3x on a good week.)

Problem 1--Just sick of my eating plan.

So I am about 17 lbs away from reaching my goal weight as long as I don't have any increases or mess ups etc. I have roughly 5 weeks to make this goal. I am trying desperately to stick to this plan but frankly I am just sick of it. I smelled egg whites this week and almost became physically sick because I eat it so often (and yes I have the cookbook but nothing appeals to me in it.) How I long to mix my foods (like have an omellete with meat ad veggies in it etc or a bison cheese burger with 2 slices of bread. I hope that isn't a pipe dream and I can have that without a weight fluctation.)

Problem 2-I think I should have a lower weight goal than given, but I am having a hard enough time trying to make the goal the center already set for me.
My goal is to be 170 lbs. The sad thing is I feel like I need to be 15-20 lbs lower than that 170 lbs goal. People look at me and keep telling me don't go any lower (I hear I look good just as I am and too much more weightloss and I will look sickly etc.) However, even if I make the 170 my BMI will be 25.1 and my healthy BMI should be under 25. Heck even my doctor said be careful about going to low. Someone else (in church no less) remarked, "How much did you lose, a 100lbs????!!" (I thought that was offensive in addition of her perusal of me and a comment about losing my backside which I never had anyway! {I knew her, she is a family friend} It was offensive too because I have lost around about 45 lbs. no where near 100 lbs. But then it isn't too offensive because I had a period of time where I have been over 260 so if I make 160 it would be the truth. Sorry I am losing focus and getting off on a tangent, but I have so many issues and conflicting thoughts that its hard to reign them all in right now.

I have had so many people warn me and tell me don't lose anymore weight. I guess in the face I look slender or average despite my double chin but I will suck that on up. When clothed, I can kinda see the weight loss and see that I look different. I caught myself looking at my reflection in the frozen foods aisle at the grocey store today. It's weird because in a way I see me, it kinda "looks like me," but then it doesn't seem like its me or that its real that I lost some weight-- if that makes sense. When I look in the mirror sans clothes, I see the same shape (egg shape I call it all of it in the belly and thighs) I had before my weight loss even though the clothes sizes are smaller.

Problem 3-I'm concerned about the flappity skin on my thighs and my big beer looking gut (I don't even drink!!!!!!!!!!!)
I look like I am pregnant minus the actual baby with the proper shaper on to smooth loose skin and fat rolls. I don't believe the loose skin is going stop flappin on my legs and else where. I don't feel like I am gonna be able to tighten up etc. I am not liking what I am seeing on that front or what I perceive what I "think" I am going to see when I have hit my goal.

Problem 4- Lack of motivation and food isn't enjoyable to me. I almost dread eating now.
However, I just feel like I can't do it anymore. I am bored with my workouts now so that is why I slowly am not doing that. I am trying to do the new workout I wanted to do but had intitially held off on it because the center thought I may end up slowing my weight loss by burning more calories than taking in. (After discusing the issue this week the center gave me the green light for my new workout.) I am trying not to mess up how well I have done but I am sick of the restrictions. Like a kid acting rebelling against a parent I lost it. Bad news--I messed myself up last weekend and went on a chinese food binge. Good news--I tried to stay as MRC minded as possible when I did it. I know I did it because I wanted to taste something good for a change and I am tired of cooking. I always joke I am losing weight because I am forced to eat my own terrible cooking--kinda of a joke but a whole lot of truth behind that.

Problem 5 (Whew) - Its my bday on the 27th of this month. I had promised myself I was going to be a new, thinner me. This was like a bday gift to myself. Now it feels like its in jeopardy due to my apathy. I feel like a quitter because I want to and just don't want to do this anymore.

End of rant.

For those who hung in there reading this, bless you and thanks for letting me get this off my chest. I sorely appreciate this.

Harlow .... you've done such a good job! I totally understand how you feel --- that's a part of what happened to me. The loose skin, the boring food, all of it! But, I want to encourage you to stay the course. I didn't and gained back a lot of what I worked so hard to lose. (boo) Maybe take a break if you think it will help .... but if you do, monitor your weigh really carefully, and have a set-point, above which you will not go, or it just comes back so fast! You've worked too hard for this. Hang in there. Sorry I don't have better advice, but I would just hate to see you do what I did.

I don't really know anything about MRC so I hope it's ok that I post here. But maybe you need to change the type of diet you're eating. In the long run, its a lifestyle change (not a temporary diet) so it's important to find something you can sustain for a lifetime. It sounds like you're unhappy with the food you're eating so maybe it would help to try something else?

Harlow Grey, I had / have a lot of the same issues / concerns you have.

I have been in Maintenance for 5 months now and had lots of body issues, even almost regretting that I had lost the weight (at 62 I really hated to lose my shapely butt and my beautiful youthful breasts - they look like 'granny's' now) but I do appreciate being able to cut my own toenails and wear my blouses tucked in. I know I am much healthier and I do feel better.

My center offers yoga twice a week and I go as often as I can. I think my skin is tightening up and not being so saggy. I want to exercise more but just haven't felt like it.

I have kept weighing myself but I stopped keeping a food diary in January. After the holidays, the scale has been slowly creeping up but I just can't make myself go back on the green menu. Then at the suggestion of another 3FC member (Thank you PorchMom84) I signed on to SPARKPEOPLE.COM. I can list what I eat each day and see the breakdown: how many calories, fat, carb, protein. Now I can evaluate what I am eating much better. I see that I am getting too many of my calories from the fats I eat and not enough protein (I haven't been using HNSs much on maintenance).

This might help you now even though you are still on the green menu - doing something new and different to keep track of what you eat, seeing how close you can get to the 60% protein 20% fat 20% carb ratio that MRC meals strive for. IT might give you new inspiration.

SPARKPEOPLE.COM also has a fitness tracker and suggestions for exercises. I have printed off the strength exercises and started today doing the upper body exercises. It might give you some different things you can do.

Harlow, you are giving yourself a wonderful Birthday Present. You have lost a significant amount of weight. You were wise posting your feelings - get them out so they don't consume you. The feelings you are going through right now are not unusual and not permanent either. Hormones and body chemistry can change how we feel. Be sure to keep drinking enough water. As you get closer to the end of this part of the journey, you will learn to make good choices and not think of it as cheating. (I really wanted bread with lunch and fruit with breakfast.) It's okay that you had that delicious chinese meal - life is worth living! Don't beat yourself up about it, you made good choices and now, today is a new day. Give yourself a big hug and enjoy a beautiful spring day! jeanette

Harlow
I feel and have felt the same way. I went thru this and they kept telling me that I had to loose more because if your body fat % is not low enough (lower than 26%) so please don't worry.....the fact that you think you should be lower may be correct and they will adjust the goal weight as you get to it! Don't be surprised. I am 5'9" and at 165 my body fat was not there. I had gotten to 160 and still wasn't under 26% so.....depending on your body fat % they may adjust your goal.

Next.....you should be able to exercise they actually want you to... I did spin class and C25k and weight training the first time and hiking with kids and more. I am doing the same this time too!!!! I was told you can do 3 45 minute cardio classes each week. My spin class was very intense and a full hour. They said no problem because the warm up and cool down are not calculated in the 45 minutes. They also told me the bike rides and hikes with the boys didn't count because they were not high intensity. Weight training I could/can do all I want because it is not cardio.

Now.....last time I lost beyond goal and was VERY disappointed because I looked just like I did at the 237. I was just a smaller same shaped woman. The bread dough looking belly was still there....extra skin flab on my thighs....I hated it. This time....I have friends that envy my stomach. I have done weight training 4 times a week. I don't do spin now as I had to cut the costs in our household and my gym membership got the axe. I really think the weights are needed. If you are bored with workouts change it up! Try dancing with the music up or rebound. You are supposed to change your workouts every 4-6 weeks anyway so that your muscles will always be challenged.

For the food.....have you seen my back to basics challenge? What things do you like and are you eating now??? Give me some of that and we can think of somethings for you to try that you may love. You said that you miss veggie omelets -- have you put a Tablespoon of salsa on your eggs???? It does wonders and according to my center is allowed!!!! Woo hoo! Give me some ideas of what you are eating and what you like and lets see what we can do!

Next....people have no idea about weight....none at all. Most cannot guess the weight of a person and if they saw 100#s would guess it much lighter! As a taller woman, I carry weight fairly well or so I have been told....last time I lost everyone told me that I needed to stop, that I looked too small, but this time I get compliments on my body. The difference this time is my attitude. I was feeling like you and people could feel my frustration and just wanted me to be happy; they justified that if I am that miserable I must be trying to be smaller than healthy. I also KNOW that the exercise and weight training makes me happier....and more confident.

Lastly.....make a plan to stick with it. Decide what you are going to do and be happy that the stress and worry is over and you have a plan. Then follow it!

harlow, I feel exactly like you do.. I am 7 pounds from my goal, but I keep eating crap and I feel like I just really don't care anymore.. I know what the consequences will be if I don't complete this, but i can't seem to stop myself from eating the junk. I re-enrolled and am not going to do it again.. I just don't know where to pull the strength I need to finish this from. The folks on this board are wonderful and so are the folks at MRC, but I feel like I am just done.. I want to finish and do stabilization and on from there.. So you are not alone in these feelings. I guess we just need to do what we need to do to get through it.. Overall I think we have done well.. Need to keep that in our minds.. sorry i couldn't offer any real help.. I am in the sinking boat with you and I don't see the coast guard.. LOL..
Cheers!

Ronnie

Harlow,
I could have written the same exact rant! I am so SICK of eating the food...I do not enjoy meal time...My thighs are so saggy as well as my breasts. I started this diet last May. I needed to lose 120 lbs. I lost 90 lbs and had to have surgery TWICE in a month on my leg, then went on vacation for a week. I was off program for 5 weeks and GAINED 15 lbs back. I am so angry with myself. But I enjoyed every moment of the forbidden foods. I am a FOOD ADDICT!!! I must keep saying this to myself...WE work too damn hard to lose the damn weight! I have not exercised. I am hoping if I start doing exercise that my skin will tighten up. I hate the way I look naked. I, like you, just see the same fat body only smaller. I cannot afford plastic surgery or Liposuction. I have a husband that takes pictures of other women's breasts or butts and tells me this is what he wants me to look like! Talk about having poor self image issues! I have been back on program since Monday and have dropped 4 of the 15 lbs. I gag at the breakfast choices. I don't like cheesecake...I like cheese and tortillas, but you can't eat that every day. Breakfast really sucks on this diet. I am a yogurt and fruit girl. But this program WORKS! I love that about it. I am just concerned when I get to maintenance, how will I keep form gaining again?

Well, this certainly turned out to be my rant! Sorry for bending your eyes to read this. But thank god for these message boards. I rarely write on here but read them almost everyday. Lets continue on this journey and get the job done. I DO love being 5 sizes smaller! I do LOVE walking without breathing hard! I DO love shopping in the regular stores now instead of LB or Ave. So keep up the great work you have been doing and I will get with it and start exercising. And maybe we will find some great recipes for those of us that are bored with the food and don't like to cook!!
All the best to you,
Marianne

Thank you dkmd27. You may think you didn't have better advice but you sent a good message. You are giving me a much needed warning, maybe you are being that little voice of "If I had known then, what I know now..." I think I needed to see your message because I am quick to self sabotage and you are right, I don't want to go through this again.

Thank you tiffany0809. You are always welcome here and I appreciate your efforts. The diet works and sometimes it doesn't bother me. I am just in a phase where it is bothering me now. I can eat on program 90% of the time as long as I knew there was room to have the "other stuff." I don't want it all the time but I find myself wanting yogurt or hummus. Or if I want a little bag of doritoes I would like to eat it with gaining 2 extra pounds.

The diet is just so restrictive and eating the wrong foods can mess up how your body burns the pounds off. I know I'll figure it out somehow. However, I do need to keep focusing on how its a lifestyle change.

Thanks to you too Jeanette. I signed up for Spark but never really checked it out to see what it can do. I will definately have to take a good look at it. Thanks for the words of encouragement as well.

Just the fact that you and others are going through similar situations, just does wonders for my heart. Unfortunately, I have been going through my tanita tapes and my fat is still to high, I think they are going to tell me I have to lose more anyway. I am hoping with my new change in workout that I will see a postitive change since I can now incorporate strength training.

I havent seen your challenge thread. What is it titled as?

As for food my breakfast is either 3 egg whites with toast, oatmeal, or cinnamon toast; french toast; boiled eggs; open faced cheese sandwich; cheese on a la tortilla, 1 egg and cheese on a la tortilla wrap.

With breakfast I would like a break from eggs. The center said I could eat from group 3 for breakfast but I don't have a clue as to what breakfast type meal that would be especially since you can't mix proteins. as for salsa is there a brand you use, my center (I think) had nixed salsa but that would help out with my taco salad. Any suggestions are welcomed. Thanks Jewelie

Ronnie, I am so with you on the not caring thing sometimes. I tried to explain this situation to family and friends and all I get is a blank stare. As for the coast guards I see its the posters on this board, so I'm glad they are extending me a life vest. They know I don't swim and I simply cannot drink up all this water. : ) We'll make it.

champagneblond-you lost your chest too??? I am mourning the loss of my breasts not that I had alot anyway but the situation is just sad and appears its only going to get worse as I struggle to lose more weight. i'm more upset about that then my thighs and belly issues. I can't afford surgery either. I relagated to watching Rupauls Drag Race on VH1 to see how I can give the illusion of a bigger bust. (I think after posting this I can never put up a picture now. HAHAHAHA!) Everything I am learning about being more feminine is coming from drag queens and transgender women. See now yall I've shared too much.

As for the DH and his picture taking you--my friend are a better woman than I. Outside of walking up one side of him and down the other, I would have returned the favor to him. I would have created a vision board of different body parts of handsome men that he needed to work on getting. Then I would have created a food menu and workout chart for him and a timeline. I would be nice and give him gold stars as encouragement. But I know I am wrong--I think it can go on the records that sometimes I don't play well with others.

Anywhoo, I am missing more fruit and yogurt as well. I will have to keep a look out for reciepes since I hate cooking too. Good luck to you too Marianne.

I just really wanted to say thanks to everyone. I was feeling down and your responses are making me feel so much better. God bless you all.

We are all in this together. Seems like most of us have been at this a while and it does get boring near the end. I guess we just need to hang in there and get it done. I will be so happy when I am though. I started in August and should have been done in Dec, but too much playing fast and loose with the treats made me re-sign so here I still am.. I do think the program is great though. It does what it says if you work it.. We will make it.. One way or another..

Cheers to all of us!
Ronnie