Ok, Something has been on my mind and I would like to hear your views on it. It's kind of a weird question really. I have always been an overweight person. I have 222 listed as my heaviest weight on my profile. This is not, in fact, my heaviest weight though. I was around 250 - 260 for a few years after having my son. I say "around" because I didn't own a scale at the time but I remember being weighed around this weight at the doctors. I honestly don't ever remember feeling this big but when I look back at pictures, I am shocked! I even found a pair of size 25-26 stretch dress pants that I wore. The whole thing feels very surreal.

Anyway, my dilemma is that I actually feel somewhat "guilty" over losing some of the weight. I began smoking and was diagnosed with type two diabetes that I did not have any intentions of controlling. I lived in denial for a few years because I was only considered "borderline diabetic". For three years, I smoked and ate high sugar foods. My body shed the pounds from 255 ish down to 220 in a little over a year because of the stress I was putting on it. I maintained the 220 for a few years until this past November when I said ENOUGH. I quit smoking, started eating right, exercising, and finally got my sugar and life under control.
I am not proud of how I lost that weight, I am ashamed actually and I was not sure I should even post my story but I think I need to for accountability. I know the main thing is that I am taking care of myself NOW and that the last 32 pounds I have lost has been done the right way.
I don't feel worthy of taking credit for the 35 pounds I lost the wrong way yet it was actually part of me and I did weigh that much so I need to own up to it. I am debating whether I should update my heaviest weight on my profile or let it be. Is it wrong to take credit for losing that weight? I know I didn't deserve to lose it. It's kind of a hard and touchy situation for me

You do deserve to take credit for losing that weight, even if it wasn't the best way, You know the right way now and are doing it. Congratulations on taking charge of your health.

Our tickers and profile numbers are just there for US. Sure, other people refer to them, but what you do with those numbers, and how you present and update them, is really up to you.

So if you're not comfortable, don't post it. But personally, I see no reason not to "own" that weight loss as well as the healthy loss. They're both part of your own personal journey.

I lost 28lb of weight through a mouth infection (due to neglecting my teeth)(I was planning on losing weight in that time but not by weeks of a liquid diet!)...I still put my highest weight on my profile Up to you if you include it or not but it was your starting weight and you can see how far you've come if you include it.

About 6.5 years ago I lost 60 pounds from being too poor to afford food. I rarely ate, so I shed a lot of pounds. Was it good? No, not at all. But really, the past is the past. Let's not dwell on it. Instead, let's be happy for what we're accomplishing now.

My highest weight was 267, and like you, I lost it through neglect rather than intent. My then-husband and I were going through a divorce, and I turned to alcohol and cigarettes more than food to deal with all my emotions. I guess I just really don't want to think about it, and am ashamed of it. I never considered that I was in denial over it, just never listed it because my most recent weight was carried over a number of years. Thanks for the food for thought.

Here's a thought and I hope it will make you laugh and give you some perspective.

A year and 1/2 ago, I quit smoking and put on something like 85 pounds. Since I did the right thing to quit, does that mean I can start my ticker when I get it at the lower weight? *giggle*...Nope, I own the fat just like you own the weight loss.

My opinion, of course...but win or lose, we get the credit!


Barb

Thanks gals. This really meant a lot to me and gave me something to think about for sure! I tend to beat myself up a lot because of low self esteem but I am learning to be more kind to me I read so many inspiring stories of healthy weight loss and I guess I got sidetracked from the fact that no one is perfect and we all stumble sometimes. I am going to put my heavier weight on my profile but leave my ticker alone since it represents my recent, and healthier, weight loss.

Thanks again, I am glad to have found this forum

I don't think it's wrong to count it but I personally probably would not. The reason is that when I look at my ticker, it for personal motivation and encouragement to see what I've accomplished. I've worked very hard for these pounds that are gone, and looking at my ticker reminds me that I CAN do this. So I think for me, if I was looking at the numbers and being reminded that some of them came from bad habits rather than an affirmative choice to live a healthy life, I don't think it would be as motivating.

I don't know if my starting weight was my all time high, I just know it was the number on the scale the day I decided to start this weight loss journey, and made a commitment to myself that it was going to be the last time I had to do that.

Your highest weight is a fact, you don't have to give yourself "credit" for having lost the weight to post your actual highest weight on your ticker.

You may not have lose weight initially for a healthy reason, but as long as you don't continue unhealthy habits, those pounds lost still contribute to your better health, so they do still count for something.

The "worthiness" issue concerns me though. Personally, I've had more success taking "worthiness" off the table when it comes to weight loss. I was a "worthy" person at my highest weight, and my worth as a human being, as a friend, as a daughter, a wife, a sister, does not depend on my weight.


My first 20 lbs were "accidental" (in fact without them, I doubt I would have had the courage to attempt dieting again, as in my experience dieting was more responsible for weight gain than weight loss in my life). My doctors told me that I might lose weight "without trying" when I was prescribed a cpap machine for sleep apnea. I had never lost weight "accidentally" in my life, so I thought they were full of crap. Turns out they were right.


While my weight doesn't impact upon my worthiness, it does impact my health - and I'm healthier with those first 20 lbs gone, so I "count" them, even if I didn't "do anything to deserve them."

I think that "not counting" pounds lost by less than ideal circumstances, can open up a whole can of worms.

Does that mean that if I have the flu and lose 5 lbs, I can't count those 5 lbs, because they weren't lost in a healthy manner?

What if I choose to try a new food plan, realize it's not a very healthy one, and decide it was a mistake, do I "not count" those pounds too?

If I decide that my current weight loss is due to 80% healthy habits, 15% factors outside my control, and 5% bad habits - do I get to count 80%, 95% or 100% of the weight I lose?

I think it's a lot easier just to use a ticker as a documentation of the fact of my weight loss, not the "worthiness" of it or the amount of "credit" I deserve for it.

My opinion for what it's worth (not necessarily much).

Please please please share your quit smoking secrets. It is the one aspect in my life that is completely out of control.

Even if you didn't lose the weight in the best way, you are maintaining that loss with proper diet and exercise. So I think you deserve it. You have done an awesome job!

This is so true! Your weight loss story and success and failures all belong to YOU! This site and everyone on it are just tools and guides to help you. It doesn't matter if you post it or not...it's just about you and your choices in YOUR weight loss journey! Hope it all works out for you!

I agree that you should own your loss no matter how you did it then because you are doing it right now.

But, I have seen people with their tickers that say HW/SW/CW/GW. So you could do it that way. 250 is your highest weight, you can never take that back. But, you didn't really start trying to lose until 220 so that could be your start weight? Like for me I could put HW at 215, but I choose not to because I was huge pregnant at the time! Lol but congrats to you for taking care of yourself, that's def the most important thing.