Let's replace the words in our head "you are so fat" with.... what? I read about self talk in the book Shape Your Life. How many of us loathe our bodies and all day long tell ourselves you are fat, you are a slob, etc? We wouldn't talk to others like we talk to ourselves, we are flat out mean. I think I need a mantra, a saying to replace my own thoughts in their place. I think shrinks call it thought stopping. Even if we are working towards goals can't we tell ourselves nicer things? In Body for Life I am reading that we become our thoughts, like athletes do, we are to envision success and not failure. I got stuck for a time in "failure" mode, going in a downward spiral. I know how this works as I've yo yo'd before - that one can go on the upward spiral by changing one's thoughts, setting goals just as one can go down. So let's go UPWARD and ONWARD.

Any ideas on what to replace "you are fat" with? A sentence or two? Something I can use to stop the "you are fat" self talking?

Self- "You know you are skinny inside, you just have to show everyone else on the outside", i made a sign for my mirror lol.

I also got so used to thinking "I am a fat person" that it turned into acceptance. I wasn't happy about it, but it was accepted that my lot in life was to gain weight and be fat.

I can't say that I'm swelling with love for my body, but I have vastly improved. I LIKE looking at myself in the mirror, I like trying on clothes, I like walking around in my skibbies, lol.

I don't think I have a specific mantra, other than I've fully embraced the concept that my body is a dynamic thing and I can make it what I want. I am not stuck in a fat suit. If I want to be smaller, I will be smaller. If I want to be toned, I will be toned. I have always understood the science of weight loss, but for some reason it still seemed like an unattainable thing for me. I now know that I have control over it

If you're ever hating your thighs or arms like I do, think "at least I have two strong legs, even if they aren't perfect." Or, "As long as I keep eating healthily and exercising, this body is only temporary. I've been though worse than being fat, and soon enough, I'll have the body I want."

I call myself 'chubby', I'm not sure that's any better lol

Instead of looking in the mirror and saying "Gosh, my tummy is so fat and flabby, my arms are so jiggly, my legs are like tree trunks" I've started looking in the mirror and saying things like "Wow, my legs are so amazing, they take me wherever I want to go" or "Look at that stomach, it's the product of two beautiful daughters" or "My arms kick butt, they let me hug and hold the people I love." As for a replacement for the blanket statement "You are so fat", I use "You're freakin' amazing." It's simple, easy to remember, and gets right to the point.

"you are waistline challenged"???

oh wait I'm doing it wrong

Wow, I really like this thread.

I should look at myself in the mirror and say, "I am so smart. I matter. What I say is important." At least until I start believing it.

Weight really is a matter of health, and no value judgment should be placed on size as an indicator of beauty. Society and culture, heavily influenced by media, decides what is "beautiful." Lillian Russell is considered by many to be one of the most beautiful women of all time, and she certainly was a beauty queen in her era. And she weighed almost 200 pounds.

I'm reading a book called The Artist's Way as a part of my 2010 Transformation - today's reading was quite good and applies to weight loss/fitness as well. It says that objections from our Censor are Blurts. In this course from the book we learn to detach from the negative Censor who is constantly redicules us. Rather then blurting out to ourselves negative thoughts (like look at that fat, I hate my stomach, etc) we are to immediately replace those thoughts with kind and gentle words/affirmations. Some of our negative self talk might stem from our childhood or bad relationships. The scary thing is if we are negative about ourselves we can actually attract abusive people into our lives who vocalize what we think. So we need to put a stop to the negative self talk, affirmations are powerful means to help do so.

So let's write some weight loss affirmations here and in our journals. I'm thinking I might create some 4x6 cards of weight/fitness affirmations as well as those I'm practicing from my studies. Here's some I thought of and googled:

"I choose to make positive healthy choices for myself"
"I choose to exercise regularly"
"I'm on the road to fitness"
"I am feeling thinner today"
"I'm enjoying how I feel now"
"I love the feeling of making progress"
"I love the food that makes me thin"
"I'm going to fit into the next smaller size any time"
"I enjoy being healthy"
"My body is getting stronger, thinner, healthier every day"
"I feel thin inside, the outside just has to catch up"
"I'm losing weight now. I love the feeling of making progress. I want to stay there"
"I am willing to change"
"I have the power to change my life"
"I treat my body with love and kindness"
"I am committed to my goals"

Affirmations should be repeated a number of times a day. The more positive messages you send yourself the more you'll want to do what's needed to slim down. I'm going to write affirmations to put on my fridge, on my mirror, some for my car and etc. Every time I catch myself thinking negatively I'm going to try to turn it around with something positive. Affirmations are a tool to keep in the weight loss tool box.

This is my Favorite:

My Declaration of Self-Esteem
by Virginia Satir



I AM ME


In all the world, there is no one else exactly like me
Everything that comes out of me is authentically me
Because I alone chose it - I own everything about me
My body, my feelings, my mouth, my voice, all my actions,
Whether they be to others or to myself - I own my fanatasies,
My dreams, my hopes, my fears - I own all my triumphs and
Successes, all my failures and mistakes Because I own all of
Me, I can become intimately acquainted with me - by so doing
I can love me and be friendly with me in all my parts - I know
There are aspects about myself that puzzle me, and other
Aspects that I do not know - but as long as I am
Friendly and loving to myself, I can courageously
And hopefully look for solutions to the puzzles
And for ways to find out more about me - However I
Look and sound, whatever I say and do, and whatever
I think and feel at a given moment in time is authentically
Me - If later some parts of how I looked, sounded, thought
And felt turn out to be unfitting, I can discard that which is
Unfitting, keep the rest, and invent something new for that
Which I discarded - I can see, hear, feel, think, say, and do
I have the tools to survive, to be close to others, to be
Productive to make sense and order out of the world of
People and things outside of me - I own me, and
therefore I can engineer me - I am me and


I AM OKAY

*waves hand* Ooh! Ooh! I got another one!

I am so beautiful and valuable the way I am, that I am worth the extra effort to make me as healthy as I can be. I deserve to eat good wholesome food, instead of eating junk. I deserve the pleasure and benefits of exercise. And I am strong enough, physically and mentally, to do what is good for me.

I always liked the phrase, "You are someone else's goal weight." Meaning, whatever you weigh now, someone else would LOVE to weigh that. I always liked that.