I'm reading with great interest the threads by Jay and Robin, about what works for some people and what doesn't work for others in terms of maintenance. Throughout this journey, I've been really fascinated by the eating habits of people I perceive as "naturally thin." I feel like for me to make this happen long-term, I need to accept an essence of intuitive eating, while still incorporating planning, calorie counting, and so on.

One of the behaviors of naturally thin people that fascinates me is that they simply don't eat whenever they're not hungry. It reminds me a lot of the original guy in Robin's post - he claims he eats terribly, but in reality, he only splurges maybe once a week, exercises normally, and eats well the other 95% of the time. For me, I have felt my major problem with food and a large reason why I gained weight is not so much *what* I eat, but *how much/how often* that I eat. I'm that person that feels like I need to order an appetizer, dinner salad, main meal and dessert, even though after the appetizer, I've abated my hunger and it's enough to make me content. I used to be that person that stuffed myself to the point of misery, waited half an hour, and then ate some more. Something I have noticed lately, too, is that I feel like I need to eat at certain socially acceptable times, even though I am not truly hungry. For example, on Saturday I ate a decent breakfast of scrambled eggs and a piece of toast. I was absolutely not hungry, but around noon, I felt like I should eat because it's lunch time, and that's what you do around 11-12 every day. I eat in social situations, not because I'm hungry, but because it's the social norm. I always want something sweet after dinner because that's what we did in my house growing up - not because I'm truly hungry.

I have a thin neighbor who - at a cookie exchange on Sunday - mentioned that the food at the party was the first she'd eaten all day, because she just got busy and didn't stop doing whatever she was doing since she never got hungry. This was at 4:30 in the afternoon. She could have snacked on things here and there throughout the day (my guess is that's what was happening) but never formally sat down to eat or grabbed herself a plate until then. She just never really got hungry until about that time. I have days like this where I just don't feel like eating and it seems to challenge existing ideas that we should eat to keep our metabolism up, or else we'll go into starvation mode. That anything less than the standard (getting X number of calories, or eating 4-6 meals a day, etc) isn't healthy.

Thoughts? I'm still trying to sort maintenance out, but this one has me perplexed. I feel like I'm doing something wrong if I pay attention to my level of hunger vs. following the dieting holy grail.

I am not a maintaner... I am tyring to loose but this is a very good topic. I too have wondered the same things. I also tend to eat when I think I am supposed to (lunch, supper time) rather than when I need to. And I can tell myself I am not hungry and then all of a sudden I feel hungry, like my mind is sending false hunger pains or something. Sometimes I also eat... 'to avoid going into starvation mode', but if I eat only when I am hungry my body isn't starving right!!???

I am confused on this issue.. I would also like to know what other people think. Very good discussion topic Fat Pants.

I think some people have found that if they don't make sure they eat, they crash and/or binge. But if that's not the case, I don't see any reason to eat just because it's "time." If you're going to cause problems with your metabolism, it's not going to happen because of missing a meal once in a while.

That's kind of my thinking, and I know I can get into situations where if I'm TOO hungry, I will consume everything in my peripheral vision. However I'm just thinking on a day to day basis, only eat when you're hungry. The comments I've heard is that it's "unhealthy" to only eat when you're hungry, even if that means you're truly not hungry until 4 pm. Which by the way, I could never do... just using that as an example.

Here's what happens to me. It's "time" for my snack, but I'm not hungry. So, I don't eat it. Then, 20-30 minutes later, I'm RAVENOUS!!!

Fortunately, my daily life is such that I just eat the snack then--or the meal, whatever it is. But it would be a drag if I didn't eat breakfast, for example, because I wasn't feeling hungry, and then it hit me on the commute or in the office...

Plus, many people with a long-standing weight problem (not all, I hasten to add) have gotten into the habit of not eating during the day, and then eating the house at night. So for folks like that, a regular schedule of meals/snacks is sometimes helpful at the beginning, just to help them even things out.

And LOTS of overweight people don't feel hungry for breakfast. Nevertheless, breakfast really is an important meal. I think it's helpful to eat SOMEthing for breakfast, even if it's just a piece of toast and some peanut butter with a glass of lowfat or nonfat milk.

Jay

There are a ton of weight loss "rules", and for everyone one I did follow, there were probably 10 I didn't....and I don't mean ten that were based on fads and myths, but 10 viable strategies that work well for other people, but weren't right for me.

I do try to eat fairly regularly, because I fall into the "don't eat-get ravenous-eat everything in house" cycle pretty easily. So for me, even if I'm not hungry, I do try to eat something. Other people need much less planning and can be less regimented.

Different things work for different people, and if you do better only eating when you're hungry, then go for it...but keep an eye out for the starve-overeat cycle, and if you discover you're prone to it, try to eat on a more regular basis.

This is an interesting topic. I think it is yet another one of those things which, like most topics in maintenance, varies from person to person. There are a few types of people I have noticed. That's not to say that all maintainers/losers fall into one of these categories, just that these are some common ones.

1) People who have blood sugar issues. These people usually need to eat on a regular schedule with carefully controlled carb counts and portions, because they might be hypoglycemic, insulin resistent, diabetic, etc. For these people food needs to be on schedule to keep their blood sugar consistent.
2) People who will binge if they get too hungry. I used to be one of these people but I'm working on it. These are people who eat more frequently because if they find themselves very hungry, they will overeat. For example, if someone ate an apple at 10:00, maybe a salad would be plenty for lunch. If they didn't eat that apple at 10:00, they might be so hungry that they cave to temptation and get a cheeseburger for lunch instead. Note that the calories in a cheeseburger are more than the salad and apple combined.
3) People who need structure, schedule, and control in their lives. Some people feel that if they don't eat at their regularly scheduled times, they are no longer in control of their eating plan, and they get stressed out by it. For these people the anxiety caused by not having their food exactly according to plan is enough to trigger binging or other problematic behaviors, or just to make them unhappy.
4) People whose food is tied to their exercise because they are training for some sort of event (marathon, triathlon, weight lifting competition). For these people eating particular foods at particular times may be part of their training regimen. For example, someone training for weight lifting may have a protein shake when they are done with their workout, whether or not they are hungry, because their coach/plan/whoever says that right after the workout they need protein for their muscles to build up.
5) People who are like you described, who can go for longer times without eating and do not need to stick to a food schedule. There seem to be fewer of these people, probably because eating more often usually means eating more overall which is how many of us got fat in the first place. I think we are seeing more people who fall into this category though, including people who were not like that before they started their weight loss journeys.

I'm curious to see if you guys agree with my broad categories.

Personally, I used to eat 3 main meals and 3-4 snacks per day. I had found that usually if I got too hungry before a meal, I would eat too fast, not feel as full, and end up eating extra food. So, I just made sure I was never particularly hungry, so that I would not be tempted to eat off plan or eat too much. More recently I had to cut back my calories further in order to try to get back to goal weight. I felt like my main meals were already a good size, so I decided to cut back on the snacks. Now that I've gradually worked my way down to 3 meals plus 1 snack per day, I find that I'm not actually all that hungry. It's okay for me to be hungry at mealtime now. However, I can't get *too* hungry. If I'm starving (like, painfully hungry) then I will get grumpy, yell at people, cry, and eat large quantities of off-plan food (Megan knows what I'm talking about!). If I didn't eat until 4:30pm, I'm pretty sure that would happen to me!

I always eat breakfast - I've done it so long that it's a habit, and in fact I'm usually hungry for it. But, my eating can, and does, vary between weekdays and weekends.

During the week while I'm working, I usually have a 10-10:30 am snack, lunch between 12:30 - 1:30, and sometimes a snack in the afternoon (I always have some to eat, just don't always eat it) and then dinner somewhere between 6:30 and 7:30 (depending on whether DH is home, or I went to the gym, etc) I rarely eat after dinner, though I might have a cup of tea.

On the weekends, after breakfast, I often get busy and don't eat lunch til 2 or later (DH often wanders in to where I am says plaintively "is there going to be lunch today?" ) I often don't have any snacks on weekends. Dinner is the same time or later, and I usually make something both days that will serve for lunch and/or dinner a couple days during the week.

I'm retiring this spring, and I'm curious to see if my weekdays will then become like my weekends....

Who me?

No, lol, I definitely know what you mean! Sadly for my BF, he also has learned to appreciate the importance of keeping me fed in a timely fashion. Not that he controls what I eat, but occasionally he doesn't understand why if we're going somewhere I need to eat first or pack food to take. He's a good sport about it now though - he's learned why I need that food!

I'm not diabetic, never been tested for or diagnosed w/ hypoglycemia, but am definitely very sensitive to blood sugar swings. That's why I eat 3 meals and 2-3 snacks a day, lots of lean protein, fruits & veggies, healthy fats, whole grains, minimal processed carbs. I don't subscribe to diet "rules", I've learned it's just what's best for me. That way my energy stays up and I don't get blood sugar lows, which make me either really tired or if I haven't eaten enough, painfully hungry, nauseous, dizzy, and any energy I had is instantly zapped (even for several hours after I do get to eat). The processed carbs thing is also something I've learned, while I believe the "eat what you want in moderation" theory I just respond really badly to processed simple carbs and want to go to sleep. Immediately. It doesn't matter if I'm at work...driving... so that's why I try to avoid them.

I will skip a snack if I'm not hungry, but I'll save it and will usually want it in a little while. I'll eat a meal later if I'm not hungry at the "standard" meal time, but that doesn't happen very often to me.

I fit into #1-4 of the "types" Jessica listed. I've learned what works for me, and to some people my way of eating just seems crazy.To me eating just one meal a day or skipping breakfast (aren't you starving like me when you wake up?!) is unthinkable, but to each his/her own, even if I don't understand it. I really believe that listening to our bodies is important. Your body will tell you what it wants, if you learn to eat intuitively.

FP, I don't think there is a dieting holy grail (or a magic pill, or a magic ab genie you can buy from an informercial, or...)! I know many successful maintainers who've lost and kept off their weight best by doing their own thing, making up their own plan. Do what works best for you is my advice to anyone trying to lose weight or keep it off.

Me too. The carb coma - definitely to be avoided.

Yup - carb sedation, followed in 2 hours by a ravenous, almost uncontrollable craving for more simple carbs.

You're right, MBN. I'd obviously blanked that bit out for my own personal safety!

Actually Megan and Jessica, I feel like I fit into all of those categories as well - except for perhaps the first one. It's like a little of each of those things applies to my maintenance (and dieting) outlook. One of the reasons I'm putting off marathon training until 2011 is because I still feel I have weight to lose and many people don't lose weight during endurance training - you just need extra fuel to be able to get through the workouts!

I think the big question that I struggle with is, am I eating because I'm actually hungry, or am I eating because I feel I need to eat, even if I'm not truly hungry (such as because it's dinner time)? For the record, I do eat breakfast because I'm hungry when I wake up! But there are certain breakfasts - ones with eggs come to mind - that if I eat, I will not feel hungry for the rest of the day, and will feel energetic and able to get through my workouts. Naturally by 4pm I'll be hungry, but in these scenarios I just ask myself, why force myself to eat if I'm not hungry?

And like some of you have mentioned, if I'm not really hungry, I will actually convince myself that I'm hungry because it's time, so I should eat. It's like some warped land between the clean plate club and intuitive eating.