It's been suggested to me that my bf may be depressed, and lately I'm finding hints to this as well. What do I do? He's not the type to seek outside help. Sometimes he vents to me but it doesn't seem to help his situation. I think a lot of his depression comes from being in a situation he can change, but just doesn't put the work in, so he thinks it's hopeless. I want to be supportive, but I won't just sit by and watch while he continues on like this. help??

Anehel,
I am so sorry for what you are going through. I know that I have bipolar but there are many times that I think my husband is depressed. He has a very stressful job. Unfortunately, men aren't very open to seeing someone who can help. Many times, they view depression as a sign of weakness. My husband could also change his situation by getting another job within the same company but he doesn't because, even though he's stressed out, he's more comfortable staying where he is rather than changing. He knows that he is stressed but will not think of himself as depressed. I feel your pain. The only thing I can think of to help your bf is to try your best to be supportive. As far as counseling if he won't go alone, the only other option is couples therapy. Once you get him there maybe they can help him individually. The bottom line is unless he thinks he needs the help and wants to get it, there's no way to get him to go. If he wants to go and is afraid you could offer to go with him. Sorry I can't be more help.

I think it is so great that you want to help him and are asking how.

I can offer that I wish my husband would ask me once in a while, 'how are you doing depression-wise? are you feeling particularly bad today? did something happen to make you feel worse? what would make you feel a little better? Do you think it might help to talk to a professional? Do you want me to help you find someone?" questions like that.

I think you should speak with him and help him to find solutions for those issues.