I am a newbie, and I am getting very discouraged.

I lost a bit of weight before moving to California in August, but I gained it back, staying with my parents for a few weeks in September. My parents are both diabetic and overweight, and my mom thinks that Danishes are a proper breakfast. They always have cupcakes, pies and cookies on hand and their popcorn has to be double butter. They complain about plain popcorn - its "too bland." I simply try to eat right (no processed foods), and my father says that I am on a "weird diet." They complain that I should "live a little" while I visit instead of watching my calories and what I eat. You get the idea.

So, I get back to California in late September and realized my weight gain, then immediately take steps to correct it. I planned all my meals to make for myself and my boyfriend, using a low-fat cookbook, and stepped up the exercising. I had to return to the midwest around the middle of October, and I started recording my food on Livestrong when I got back here, starting October 19 - I have generally not gone above 1,500, but I have had maybe two days when I went off the wagon. I also am on day 10 of Jillian's "Making the Cut," about the toughest workout you can imagine. I do her circuits twice every time I go.

And nothing. I think that I have lost one lb. since the last week of September when I got back on my program. And don't tell me that it is because I am gaining muscle and losing size, 'cause that ain't happening either. No inches lost.

To say that I am discouraged is an understatement.

So, what should I do? In Jillian's book, she instructs not to go below your BMR in eating your calories each day, which would put me at 1,400 and some change. I stay right around there. Should I take my calories to 1,200? My exercising is staying right on track, I am not losing focus on that at all, so my calorie intake is the only thing I can tweak now.

I need help. I am getting very depressed and discouraged about this. I don't understand how I am not losing weight, when I am really putting in the effort.

Thanks for any input!

What do you mean you 'generally don't go above 1500'? How about the days you have gone off ?

Are you measuring your food? How sure are you about the calories?

Also, it is hard to make up with excess eating through exercise. Beyond that, when you exercise, your muscles can retain water. Beyond that, the amount of water we have at any moment fluctuates. So if you lost a lb of fat, gained a lb of water, your scale would detect no change but you would've really lost a lb.

I'd give yourself a good solid month of counting your calories and following your exercise routine and see what happens.

Well, I have gone over twice. Once when I got into too many halloween candies and last night when my mother made cookies. Even those two times, I didn't go above 2,000 calories.

I do weigh and measure my food.

Also, I am confused by one thing. I always read "don't skip meals, and never skip breakfast." I also read "never eat unless you are hungry." Well, what if you aren't hungry for breakfast? Or for lunch? If you skip those meals, you are breaking one rule (don't skip meals), but if you eat them, you are breaking another (eating while not hungry).

Which would be better - to force yourself to eat while not hungry, just because you aren't supposed to skip meals, or skip them and eat only when you get hungry?

If you aren't hungry for breakfast, you ate too much the night before. If you want your metabolism working at top speed, you need to give your body fuel. It would be better to eat smaller meals so you could eat more regularly during the day. What you eat is also important. Even if you stay within your calories, if a lot of that is made up of prepackaged foods and sweets, you are depriving your body of proper nourishment. 1500 calories may not be enough for all the exercise you do.

I stay away from processed foods. I eat clean. And I am not generally hungry in the morning, no matter how little I ate the night before.

I'm the same. It has nothing to do with how much or how little I ate the night before. You really can't tell me that I "ate too much" when dinner was a measured cup of vegetable soup only at 5:30 p.m. and I had nothing after.

Re the eating when not hungry v. not skipping meals thing, I think it's better to eat a little when not hungry. My understanding is it kick-starts your metabolism, so even though I have no appetite, I try to have some small something -- usually a hard-boiled egg with vegetable juice, or a slice or two of deli ham. Grain carbs -- even the healthy ones -- tend to set my appetite on fire if I have them in the morning, so I stick with protein till at least midday.

jillianfan, it sounds to me like you've hit a solid plateau. You might play with your calories a bit and/or shake up your exercise routine, but if you know you're doing everything on your plan, I'd just ride it out. I've heard people around here talk about plateaus they've hit for SIX MONTHS. I hope that's not the case for you, but give yourself some room and let things unfold with as little worry as possible. You're on track; trust yourself.

Eat breakfast, if you aren't hungry make it only about 100-150 calories of food. Your body needs the jumpstart in the mornings.

I don't have a lot of advice about your calories because I'm not anywhere near that in experience. I have read and have prepared myself to believe when I get down closer to my goal I may have to drop my calories down to 1200 even if it's below my BMR, simply because I've seen many of the maintainers need to do that once they got closer to their goals.

Thank you everybody for your advice and encouragement!

I hope that it isn't a plateau. But I will ride it out, although I am tempted to start starving myself. I know that will not work at all, my metabolism will slam to the floor and all of that, but it is tempting.

Raebea - you know what, I will try your trick of eating proteins and vegetable juice in the morning. Usually when I eat breakfast, I force myself to eat carbo stuff - usually french toast made with Ezekiel bread, or cereal or a protein shake made with Muscle Milk. But I will try eating just a hard-boiled egg and a V8 in the morning and see what that does.

I do feel better than I did earlier. I talked to my boyfriend (he is in California, and I am still in the midwest taking care of business). He understands and is supportive, unlike my parents. He just told me to knock off the snacking, because he knows how I love to snack, and eat lots of carrots. And he assures me that he isn't worried about my excess weight, he loves me just the same. So, I feel a bit better.

I guess I gotta keep on keeping on and have faith that my efforts will eventually pay off. Why does it have to be so hard, though?

Jillianfan, our stats are really similar. I feel your frustration too. I've been trying to lose 30 lbs. on and off since the spring. I'll count calories, go to the gym 4-6 X/week, and wil be lucky to lose 2 lbs for the month. Then I get discouraged and stop counting until I get motivated again. Luckily, I have not gotten over my high weight again.

I was doing 1500 calories/day - my dr. said that was too high(!) and recommended 1200. Still same results - in the month of October, I was down 2.5 lbs. So Sunday I decided to go low-carb for a few weeks to see if I can finally get below 150. I'm just a below on my new scale - Friday is my official weigh-in day.

I'm eating eggs, egg whites, turkey, chicken, fish, low-fat cheese, cottage cheese, nuts, green salads, broccoli..you get the idea. I could never do this permanently since I'm not much of a meat-eater at all, and I LOVE whole grains, but I figure I can do anything for 2-3 weeks if it helps.

Good luck!

Natamar - let me know if the low-carb thing works. It sounds like we are having similar issues!

Your doctor said 1,200? Well, I will try that for a few weeks, and maybe lower my carbs. I am confused, though, because I have low-carbed before, and I tend to get very depressed and irritable when I go low-carb. It does work for weight loss, though.

At your starting weight, being that you're not in a higher BMI category, it IS going to take consistency. That's right, even one off day a week can without a doubt offset the other 6 "good" ones and wipe out any calorie deficit you may have created. So, I really don't think this is a plateau. Well, if it is, then it's a self-induced one and can easily be "corrected" by sticking with your plan day in and day out. 7 days in a row.

Keep tweaking your plan and make it work for you, so that it will be simpler to stay on plan. The program works if you work the program. Don't give into momentary temptation, always, always remembering what you want the MOST. "Those foods" or the weight loss.

You might want to try a fat free/sugar free yogurt for breakfast with 1/4 cup of Fiber Once cereal mixed in. Experiment. Be creative. Again, being open to changing the plan to make it better for you.

I don't think 1500 calories is too much. I am just a little bit shorter than you and lost on about 1200 - 1400 calories a day. I maintain on around 1400 calories a day. In your case I would not go below 1200 . Sometimes all it takes is perseverance. Keep at it and it will come off. Do not let yourself get discouraged.

jillianfan - first, ! Your frustration just OOZES out of your post! Second, congrats on doing so many of the right things that you've had work for you in the past. I'm guessing you're doing exactly what you did that helped you lose weight the first time? I echo the breakfast tip - switching to protein in the morning is most likely the biggest contributor to my ongoing success. I think I'd just try that for a week or two all by itself, and see how it makes you feel. I learned here at 3FC that food is fuel for your fire (metabolism) - and sometimes to get those glowing coals back into a raging bonfire, you have to add MORE fuel. Some folks here have had truly awesome results by bumping calories UP. But I'd still try the breakfast first. If it's a missing link for you, you should know about that pretty quick. Good luck!!!

Wow - you ladies really are great support! I am glad that I found this place. It touches me that you all care enough to take the time to respond like this.

I am feeling a bit better emotionally than I was this morning. I went to the gym for my "Making the Cut" butt-kick session, and walked to the gym this time (about 5 miles round trip). Yeah, stepped on the scale, lost .2 lbs. While that was extremely depressing, I was cheered by the fact that, no matter what, I am getting stronger. By leaps and bounds, really. So, that is one thing. I need to count my blessings.

That said, I have gotten lots of really good advice on tweaking my diet. I think what I will do for awhile is to limit my carb intake to one piece of Ezekiel bread or Ezekiel tortilla per day, the rest of the day just have lean protein, veggies and fruit. You ladies seem to have good luck on the lower carb routine, and I need some carbs, or I become very depressed, so I can't cut them out altogether (like on Atkins).

I was having one fun size Milky Way per day (80 calories), but I guess I will cut that out too.

I am still confused on whether I should cut it down to 1,200 calories per day, or keep it at around 1,400. I am nervous about cutting back, because Jillian's program is tough - over an hour of circuit training, four days per week - and I am afraid that my body will go crazy if I am not feeding it enough. But, then again, the 1,400 isn't working for me so far, so maybe I should try 1,200 for awhile and see if that does it.

At any rate, thanks again for caring everybody!