Okay chickies, I am on here reading all the time, but mean to post. Tonight though it is a paper I am doing for sociology. I picked Obesity and are people treated different. I know from my personal experience I have been.

But I went to http://www.timescolonist.com/Health/...318/story.html

and read down that it was dietitians and doctors, in some cases that, felt fat people were disgusting, but I had to stop researching and decide if I want to keep on reading. It got me when I read that college students would pick a missing limb person with a sexually transmitted disease before picking a fat person.

I don't know, I guess I have just started this research and have a ways to go, and don't know if I want all that negativity in my head. I play these things over, no matter how hard I try not too. It just makes me sad, I put myself in a position to be opened up to all that kind of stuff.

It runs deeper than the assignment. I don't know how much more I want to read, there is no changing the paper subject now. I am going to power through it. This is the third resource I have hit and this was my final straw for feeling bad.

I guess this past week, I have had my own experience. I go to the gym three times a week without fail. I have trainer. I am basically working out to eat. But my son came home from college and we went and signed him back on yesterday. The thing is, the woman at the counter, who is syrupy nice did this with my husband when I signed him on-- when my son and I walked up to the counter and I said I need to add him, she said, oh, you can't add friends. I said this is my son.

I look younger than my 39 and he looks older than his 22 LOL, but she said, oh, and looked surprised, but when she got my account up, she saw my husband, who has the same name as my son and said he is on here, I said, no, this is junior, that's my husband. She looked at me and said, "oh, I didn't think you were married"

I smiled and asked why, you know when people are 'hinting' at your weight.. she said, oh, I don't know... I rolled my eyes and walked off.. I am there with my husband every friday, the only day we get to work out together...

I don't know, I am just feeling it tonight and thought I'd come where I know there is no harshness for being fat.

THanks chickies for letting me vent, but I am still not impressed with what I have taken on. I feel outraged at people's stupidity. I know that the common theme is 'it's your own fault you are fat'... maybe so, but don't be an *** about it.

The woman at your club reacted that way?
A fitness club?

Her supervisors need to know she's treating their clientele this way. That's terrible.

About the other stuff--yeah, it is a very harsh world out there. But that has nothing to do with you! You are not responsible for their prejudice. Hold you head up high.

I took a class last year on Women and the Western Media and had to write several papers for class. I think I was hacked-off for the entire semester!

Weightism is widespread and more insidious than racism. There are a lot of people who feel it is perfectly fine to harbor that prejudice. They express their prejudice openly in many ways. Frankly, these people are uncivilized, uncouth, mean-spirited and ill-mannered. As with any prejudice, it is more about the lack of character of the ones harboring it.

Don't write your paper with your brain in victim-mode. There's a huge difference between writing about what happens to the obese in the modern world and writing about how we allow these events to affect us. Maybe you can attack the paper from the view of how the obese allow events to strip away their power vs. mobilizing them to action.

And if that twig-girl at the gym ever implies anything about your appearance again, let her know that if she ate a little more food perhaps her brain would start to function.

Georgia

I think there are always going to be people or groups of people who discriminate. I think with the obesity issues one of the reasons why it is probably higher now, i mean the percentage of people who are intolerant, could be because every week you hear about the "obesity epidemic" and you see articles, news stories, and more. What the press and media portray really affects the population. Case in point. Some guy walking down the street, off to work, minding his own business and suddenly half of his body is on national TV and he is now a visual image of someone who is fat, unattractive, stupid, obese.

I think the overall opinion is that fat people are lazy, ignorant, unattractive, when that is obviously not true.

I remember when I had to go to the doctor for the first time in years. I finally got insurance and I was scared to death of how I was going to be treated, what was going to happen to me, etc. The moment I walked in there with my packet I made of my own information, my smile, and my positive attitude completely changed the room. The nurse that I had was not looking forward to dealing with me, I could tell. She sort of looked me up and down and then she started asking me questions. I told her of my weight loss and I swear she did a 180. I told her about my juice feasting and about how I used to be there and now I'm here and from that point on she treated me differently. Even my doctor was super kind and you know I really think it was the attitude I had that not only surprised them, but also opened doors of communication. Like it is OKAY to talk to me about my weight. Really. They were happy to have me as a patient lol.

What kind of is my mind is if I didn't have a "can do" attitude then how would I have been treated?

My OBGYN doesn't like me. She doesn't like my weight, I can tell. She sort of looked at me like "oh boy another fat one" but then again I think her attitude stinks to be honest. She sort of acted like it was a chore to deal with me and I didn't do anything lol. She probably does think I'm disgusting, but to be honest I don't really care. She wasn't mean to me, she just wasn't friendly if that makes sense. When I go back to see her, we'll see if she is in a better mood lol.

I think there are times we do allow people to treat us poorly, however there are times when things literally sneak up on you. A woman fired because of her weight, or someone being rejected by health insurance because some guy felt they were too fat.

It's kind of sad how socially acceptable it still is to hate on fat people, but it certainly makes us resilient folks.

I find it the most frustrating when I'm out there trying to do stuff -- like I was doing the MS walk and guys sitting on the bench were yelling Titanic! at me as I walked by. It was almost baffling though -- hey here I am doing this long walk, raising money for a good cause, and they still use it as an opportunity to ridicule someone? As frustrating as it is, it's so easy to look at the situation and see that it's their problem, not my problem.

And I like Georgia's advice lol.

THanks chickies for your support while I got my paper done. I never play victim or feel victim and I think that is what made me so mad doing the paper. I am not by any means a quiet person that sits and watches. I thought, how dare somebody else think it is okay to make an assumption about me based on my weight. I know it happens in all kinds of situations, not just weight.

I feel for you and the fact you were trying to do a walk out there and be supportive for a cause. The only time I feel awkward, is if I am with my husband or son and I am afraid somebody will say something to me, and I would feel embarrassed for them.

Now, that being said, I was getting off a flight in Germany and there were only two people left on the plane and I was behind my husband and they were sitting across from each other waiting for us to go by and one said, oh there is an earthquake today in Europe. I knew the guy meant me... I turned around and went back, only because my husband was way ahead of me and I asked the guy "What?"

and he looked a little embarrassed and didn't say anything. I just smiled and said, I didn't think so. I know when I did the paper, it came clear to me how many times I had been dissed, but oh, well, I guess. I am still alive and well. LOL

I seem pretty fun loving, but I have no problem putting somebody on the spot who is mean. I had a gay kid at my college, walk by me last semester and with his friends, and make a comment about the poor chair I was in must be begging for mercy.

I jumped up and went around the corner with them, I was the only one in the commons, so it was only me they were laughing at, so I asked him, hey, it is awlful funny that you would make a fat joke, since you don't like being made fun for being gay....


two days before my incident, I saw him in the main commons and some other group was calling him all kinds of names for being flamboyant in his fish net shirts and pink satin pants......

He didn't back down, and neither did I, but I could tell he was thinking. He was trying to stay together and bratty with this friends, but he didn't say anything else. I wasn't crazy acting running, but I have found my new approach to calling people on it, immediately, works for me and shows people they can't just make nasty, rude and hurtful comments and get away with it.

I think because I am not screaming and acting crazy, but just saying, hey, what's your deal, it puts them on the spot. By the way I perfected this technique with a highly fat phobic dad and sister and it cured them both. I don't let a single thing slide. I got so fed up with backhanded comments that never seemed to end.

Thanks again chickies and too bad there are so many crazy people out there!

You go thinchickie! Perhaps if we (as overweight persons) were all more willing to call people out there would be less of this kind of thing. It has certainly worked for other groups- we should learn from that.