Hi, Everyone,

Here's my "official" version of the fable:

The Hare and the Tortoise

A hare met a tortoise one day and made fun of him for the slow and clumsy way in which he walked.

The tortoise laughed and said, "I will run a race with you any time that you choose."

"Very well," replied the hare, "we will start at once."

The tortoise immediately set off in his slow and steady way without waiting a moment or looking back. The hare, on the other hand, treated the matter as a joke and decided to take a little nap before starting, for she thought that it would be an easy matter to overtake her rival.

The tortoise plodded on, and meanwhile the hare overslept herself, with the result that she arrived at the winning-post only to see that the tortoise had got in before her.

Moral: Slow and steady wins the race.

This comes from a book handed down from my grandmother to my mother to me. The book is so old it doesn't have a copyright date or an author/editor's credit.

That fable has been the motivation for us turtles for about three years. Someone on the ancient WW forum mentioned the fable and I discovered it was very motivational for me. I talked about it in posts and other people said that the tortoise philosophy worked for them, too. So, I started a thread for us turtle types.

We work toward accepting that our bodies have a natural speed of weight loss when we choose to live a healthy life, instead of "going on a diet". Many of us have experienced "the diets" as go on/lose weight-- go off/ gain the weight plus more back.

We choose to perservere with each choice we make throughout the day. We believe that choosing to be slow, steady turtles helps us to learn the skills we need to in order to lose and keep off the weight. Our main focus is to become the healthiest people we can be.

So, welcome to all who realize that losing and maintaining a weight loss is a lifestyle change. And who want support as we all learn the skills we need to successfully make the changes that will allow us to reach our goals.

Lin

Hi, Turtles,

Lauren, glad you got a job you like again. That will take off some stress, even if it means some times without income.

I think it's always a good idea to work with our hormones whenever they're in our favor. That should pay off for you.

I wonder if one of the lessons life is trying to teach me since I moved here to Salinas is precisely how to stop overeating due to emotional issues. I've certainly had enough emotional issues to deal with.

Lauren, a good cry always helps more than eating. I used to be a person who tried not to cry. I didn't want my emotions out there for other people to comment on. It's an old response because I didn't get comfort when I cried as a child (except if I had hurt myself physically). My parents weren't nurturing or compassionate so they didn't know what to do when their children had emotional hurts. I learned to stuff them down rather than face the criticism. That's a hard habit to break.

But I've sure broken it lately. I've cried many tears as I've gotten older because my dh and kids deal with the tears better. They still feel helpless, after all they're all guys. But they don't put me down or tell me not to feel what I feel. They give me hugs and ask what I need them to do.

So, today I had another one of those crying jags. I found a memo my dh had taken out of his pocket and left in the bathroom. He either didn't want me to worry, so he didn't tell me, or he just plain forgot. Either of those is possible, so I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt.

His company is trying to save money, so they're doing plant shutdowns over Memorial Day and over the July 4 holiday and cutting back on the amount of PTO the employees earn each month. I'm really angry about this because the company is using their employees PTO faster than they can earn it. Unless employees have worked for the company long enough to have accrued unused PTO, there won't be enough to cover the plant shutdowns, let alone any personal days off. (Which is what PTO is supposed to be used for, right?) We can "borrow" up to 40 hours, but that's not enough to cover the shutdowns for the year if they also do shutdowns over Thanksgiving and Christmas (like they did last year). That will be two full weeks off during those two months. (Plus, if they're doing it over Memorial Day, what's to stop them from adding a couple of days to the Labor Day holiday?) And we were counting on having a PTO day for my ds's high school graduation next month.

I think my dh is going to have to start seriously job-hunting. I don't think this company will continue to be a good place for him to work. Unless things change, I'm sure they'll have a wage freeze and increase the amount of premiums we have to pay for health coverage. That's been the pattern for every company he's worked for that has had financial issues. That's been all of them and the end result in every case is the company going under and laying off everyone. Managers don't seem to be able to turn a company around. Once it's going down, that seems to be the end these days.

It really frustrates me because this job is the one he's liked the best out of all of the work he's done since I met him 25 years ago. It kills me to have to push him to give it up. I hope he can find a job doing the same thing elsewhere, at a company that's more stable. This one has been very stable and a lot of people have been there for 20+ years. But they were bought out by an investment firm a little while before my dh was hired. The firm, despite their assurances to the contrary, is pressuring them to reduce the red ink, thus the layoffs a month or so ago and the plant shutdowns.

So, I guess I need more prayers and good vibes, ladies. I'm trying not to overeat in response to this situation that I cannot take action on. Since I cannot do anything about it, I'm going to try to ignore it by focusing on my book. At least it keeps my mind occupied with something I enjoy instead of worrying and fretting. And maybe, once I have a finished novel, I'll get lucky and sell it and people will like it and . . . Or maybe I'll just have a great sense of accomplishment and a pile of rejections slips, the badge of honor for an aspiring author.

As for WW, I'm sticking to my plan and I'll see what happens. It's PMS, so I'm retaining water like crazy. But I've been doing OK so far.

Have a great day! Happy turtlin'!!

Lin
(272/249/244)

hi guys,

Tears must be in the air. I actually cried for 3 seconds at work today. I have never cried in my classroom before. A child put his name on a paper upside down. I had been doing a rush job for a bulletin board and by doing this he had to do his paper over again. Trust me, it wasn't a big deal, but I had gotten myself to the strung out phase where anything would have tipped the scales--it was just this that did it. But overall today was a good eating day. I had brought measured out cereal, bought skim milk for it--had a chicken cutlet and roll for lunch, had an apple for snack and a few nuts at the office I went to after work. Dinner was light and it's already early evening. This is a good deal.
So, getting on top of my stress is possible.

Lauren,
I am so happy for you that you can work at a place that is so much better than the present spot. Tears wash away a lot of emotions and are great! Also we've all got to remember HALT and never let ourselves get too hungry, angry, lonely, or tired. I love that acronym and think about it a lot. I also have to throw in bored because when I'm bored, I wander through the kitchen!

Lin,
I think this situation is too tough. I am sure I'm not alone when I say things have to break for you soon. I hope your dh is able to get situated with a better company. Good for you for hitting your book with gusto. You can do this. Hey, congrats on getting on the scale. I feel that puts the lid on a weight gain and it means you're ready to do all sorts of baby steps. I love the idea of a delicious supper.

Mousie,
How are you feeling? It the psychic cold gone yet? Take care and be well.

I am getting optimistic again--Hey Lin, when you stuffed down your feelings, I bet you washed them down with food to help keep those feelings buried. Our parents do lots of harm because they just didn't know any better. My sister shared a few things that my folks did to her (she's sixteen years younger than me and my mom was not the same to her as she was to me---different stages of life, etc.) Anyway, I've been trying to fill in the blanks and change her history for her in little ways. It makes me feel good and it helps her to know she's loved. Really important stuff.

Everybody do well. Let's take baby steps through these stages and we'll be triumphant. Mousie, enjoy the exercise--I'm getting mentally ready to tackle some. I know, I know, I've been saying that for about a year now!
Love to you all,
Judy

Hi, Turtles,

I had a little extra time and I wanted to check in and tell you all something unbelievable. I actually ate 3 points less than I had planned for dinner this evening. This is special because my plan ended up a point more than I wanted to spend. It feels great to be back on track. It's my hope that this will start the momentum that I need to stay on track and get back to where I was and beyond.

Talk to you all later. Happy Turtlin'!!

Lin
272/249/244

I PASSED PHYSICS!!!! YESS!!!!!!!!

I picked up the mail today and my grade postcard (we give them to profs so we can get our grades faster than we get them through the registrar) was there. And I not only just PASSED, I actually pulled my grade up from failing to a B-!!! Now granted, it's not the world's best grade, but I'm so proud of it anyway! I am just tickled pink, I can't tell you how thrilled I am. And I got a second grade postcard, too, for my Philosophy class--I got an A! I was pretty sure I was going to, but the confirmation was wonderful. I've been working so hard this semester, and it paid off!

I'm feeling better this evening, this morning I was a wreck. I had to skip Spinning because I couldn't breathe again. I swear. But I'm hopeful for getting to the gym tomorrow.

Foodwise, I've had lots of veggies today--steamed veggie plate (broccoli, cauliflower, carrots, squash, zucchini) and a salad for lunch, salad for dinner. It's veggie craving time again! But I'll deal with it. Maybe I'll throw together some soup for the week, I have the veggies...hmm.

Still not getting on the scale as per my promise to myself, in two weeks I'll see where I am. I have been doing marvelously with stopping myself with the thought "I want to go to Fest", though. THAT thought just stops me in my tracks! My Best Friend was hinting around that if I* got dessert at dinner tonight SHE would too, and I thought, "I want to go to Fest" and said a definite no, she could have some if she wanted but I wasn't interested. She didn't get any. That's okay with me--only my choices matter to me!

Lin, I'm very glad for you that your eating is getting more to where you want it to be. I know with all the stress you're dealing with--I would have cracked long ago--having something go your way must be helping a lot.

Judy, you sound fabulous! It sounds like you're really making progress, and really getting to a good place with your goals. I'm so happy for you.

Lauren, what can I say? Even when things don't go as you ideally want them to, you still show the rest of us how it's done! Now you can stop a 1 or 2 pound gain...you GO girl!

Hi, Turtles.

Ah, Lin, that's rough. I've worked for two companies that got bought out by other companies, and each time it was awful. The new companies ran the old ones right into the ground. I'm glad DH has been doing a job he enjoys; now I hope he can find an employer that values him, too. And how smart you are to just focus on things that you *can* control -- your work, your eating. Way to go on being under your planned points for dinner! Doesn't success feel great? I know you'll just keep building on those successes.

Judy, as you know, when you cut back on the eating, the emotions become raw for a while. I realized that since starting on this program 4 years ago, I feel more stress and more emotional than I used to. That's because I'm not numbing those feelings most of the time anymore. So learning new ways to cope with them becomes so important.

Last night I had a healthy response to strong emotion! For reasons I won't go into, I was scared and furious about our finances. My frustration level was through the roof. So I went outside for an hour-long, very fast walk. I realized I needed to move and move hard. DH came with me, because we needed to talk. So we talked and I cried and we walked very fast. When we got back, I was still frustrated, but it was manageable. I'm so glad I did that instead of ate.

My stress levels are definitely up as I transition to financially unstable new jobs (I get paid as I finish projects), so I know I need to watch the eating and find other ways to cope with the feelings. I'm so glad I have this group of people who are all learning to do the same thing.

Erin, congrats on passing Physics!! And with a B-, too! Way to go! You must feel fantastic. Good for you on those veggies, too -- I'm sure your body must need them with this cold. I can honestly say I have never craved veggies! Well, maybe in combination with chicken soup.

I'd better go do my workout or it won't happen. Today is weigh-in day. This morning I weighed in at -- 189. Still. I thought it would be higher, since I had another 43-point day over the weekend (two parties), so I'll take it. But I'm ready to get that number down.

Onward and downward,

Lauren
274/189/170s before Adirondacks

Hi, Turtles,

Way to go, Erin!! You passed your hardest class. I bet your other physics class will be easier for you now that you have established a good foundation by working so hard.

And you've been successfully sticking to your plan during all of the stress of finals and worry about passing your classes. That's stupendous!

Judy, you're doing so well. I admire your refusal to give up, no matter how much it seems like that old cliche of two steps forward and one step back. You know, as long as you take more forward than backward steps, you will reach your goal.

Lauren, I can understand the long walk and the tears about financial matters. Been there, done that. What you seem to be saying is that you feel really uncomfortable when your money isn't coming in regularly, like it does when you have a regular job and regular paycheck. But I know, from what you've said in the past, that the way corporations treat their employees makes you uncomfortable, too. Plus, I know you like the freedom to set your own schedule that freelancing gives you and you're disciplined enough to get the work done. Plus, since you will save an hour and a half daily commute time, freelancing might give you time to write magazine articles and boost your income by working in more than one field.

Perhaps a way to deal with this is to make a list of the pros and cons about freelancing vs. a steady job and see which is the best fit for you. Then you can embrace whichever lifestyle you really enjoy the most and learn to live with the cons inherent in it. Anyway, just discovering what makes you the happiest can lower the stress level a lot.

My dh isn't very worried. He says that orders are way down and the oldtimers say this is really unusual. Apparently, there is a lot of uncertainty after September 11 and people are repsonding by being overly cautious. I checked the employment boards and where there used to be pages of ads, there is only one. So, we're going to keep checking the ads and do our best to cope.

We're OK as far as this plant shutdown goes. He arranged to borrow PTO so he will get paid for the shutdown days and the day to attend my ds's graduation. So, we're praying that things pick up before the end of the year holidays because we won't have the cushion of borrowing PTO. We still will owe them from this time, since they cut in half the amount of PTO people are earning.

I'm still on track today. I had planned to just write any changes I made to the plan in my journal, but I ended up writing down my actual food right next to the plan. It seems to reinforce following the plan in my mind. I'm going for a walk after I finish my online time this morning.

I've been struggling to organize my writing time because I have no idea how many words/pages I can do each day. I have no idea how to create a whole world and how long that will take. I needed some direction. So, I've been researching and reading about what other people have done and picked the ideas that seem to fit my personality best. I made a plan and I'll adjust it as I go along to fit how I find I work best and what I find my particular book needs.

Life would be great if summer would get here. It's been cloudy, cold and rainy and it's almost June. I'm tired of gray skies and worrying about getting soaked when I go for a walk. I can't swim because it's way too cold. It's closer to the coast than SJ and the climate is colder, but usually not this cold, this late in the year.

Have a great day, everyone. Happy turtlin'!!

Lin

Lauren, I sympathize with financial worries. Right now we're fine, but for most of last year we had nothing coming in and it nearly tore us apart. We're trying to rebuild ourselves and each other, and it's taking time. But as DH pointed out last night, it IS happening. Thank goodness!

Lin, have you seen the movie Finding Forrester? If you haven't, you might want to rent it. In it, the writer character tells his student that the first time through you just *write*, just get it out. The second time through, you edit. I don't know what your writing philosophy is, but if you haven't seen it definitely pick that movie up.

I sympathize with your weather woes. Down here it's been gray and cloudy and cold (well, cold for here anyway) for most of the year. DH observed that it's been raining most weeks (which is unusual). I pointed out that our water table is low--we're about 10 inches behind schedule for the year--but it's still every week, in little hazy spitty fits. Ick, I say.

Aside: Hidden Valley Ranch, Fat Free, is a strong flavour. You don't need much of it, like you do with other fat-free dressings. It's 2 TBS for 30 calories, 0 fat--1/2 point, and it's all you need. I've just finished a huuuuuuuuuge plate of steamed broccoli and cauliflower dipped in ranch, and I'm munching on baby carrots, and 2 servings is enough for all of that! My lunch is 1 point (I don't count carrots)....hmmmmmmmmmm. Probably I should consider some protein.

After missing Spinning and Pilates yesterday, I went to the gym to lift this morning (I will Spin this evening) and WOW are my arms sore! Must have done some really good work.

I've been giving some thought to the idea of high day/low day/high day/low day, to shake things up. I've been hovering in the area of 27-30 points for awhile now. I'm getting great results with my lifting program and all my exercise, but I'm not seeing a difference in the fat over* the muscles. There's something that trainers always say..."You can have a 6 pack but with belly fat they're not going to show". It's not a discouragement of doing ab work, understand, but the reality that the most gorgeous muscles aren't going to show through fat. Being aware of that, I'd like to try to take the fat off, too. If I'm doing this much work for my muscles, I want them to show! So, I've pretty much determined that the even-keel approach doesn't seem to be what it takes. What do you guys think about high/low? I've read the Wendy Plan, but did you guys have any personal opinions?

Mousie,
I tried the Wendy Plan and liked it a lot. At first I was rigid with it and set up the highest points for a Saturday night. What I finally found that worked better for me was to alternate high, low, med. but not to assign certain points to certain days. I have too many things going on that I can't plan around and having the points available while still alternating them made the most sense to me.
And some Saturdays I just wasn't that hungry and that Monday I might have wanted more points. Try it and see if you like it.
I was successful and as I finish more baby steps, I'll go back to that method of eating.
May I congratulate you on your Physics grade! That is incredible. You must have gotten an A+ on your final. Way to go. And an A in Philosophy is great. Philosophy was one of my favorite courses in college.

Lin,
Glad your dh's got everything figured out for this holiday weekend and your ds's graduation. It's great that you didn't eat all the points yesterday that you had planned and that today is going so well. You're coming through like a trooper.

Lauren,
That's a great point you made about as we don't use food to stuff down our feelings that we have to develop other ways to handle stress. I'm sorry you were so upset about money. Maybe getting a good overview of your finances might help. Obviously something happened that upset your apple cart, and I'm glad the fast walk and some tears helped. Life is tough at times and you're doing your stress reduction without eating. That's major good thinking!

All goes well here. Although we had some Italian food delivered tonight, I had a small portion and topped it off with two Silhouette ice creams.
Had a nice compliment at work today. A mom told me that she had sent my principal a wonderful letter about what I had done for her daughter. Since the principal hadn't shared it with me, I
requested a copy of the letter. It was great and made me feel real good. Also had a high school senior drop in today. I had taught her in the third grade and we had great times together. Teaching can be very rewarding.

Everybody take care and be well.
Love,
Judy

Hi, turtles.

Judy, I'm so glad you got that letter. What a wonderful confirmation of what you're doing. Teachers make such a difference in all our lives. I'm amazed your principal didn't automatically share it with you, but sometimes people get busy I guess. Anyway, that's so cool.

Erin, I've never formally followed the Wendy Plan religiously, but I've had effective weight loss when I mix up my point ranges from day to day. Keeps the body guessing.

Lin, I admire your tendency to learn from what other folks have done and pick approaches to try. I've never been that systematic, but I think it would really pay off. I may take a page from your book. (See? I'm learning. )

As for the finances ... the big problem we've been struggling with is our different approaches to spending (or saving) money. This is such a tough thing in a marriage. When DH was a resident, there was little problem -- because we had so little money. Once we had more money, the problems began to appear. With my career being so on-again off-again, I lean strongly toward wanting to save. But when I do want to spend money, it's on very different things than DH wants. It's a thorny problem and brings up a lot of stuff in our relationship. We stayed up last night until 1 a.m. talking about it, so I'm a bit zonked today. Anyway, we love each other and are committed to working things out.

WW was good as always last night; it was on how to stop a craving. If I have time before we go to Canada this weekend, I'll post about it.

As for the journey, I've gotten my points back down, which is good (TOM is over, which helps), but I'm having trouble getting the exercise in. I think that will change in June when my schedule changes.

Onward and downward,

Lauren
274/188.5/170s before Adirondacks

Hi, Turtles,

Erin, I've never formally tried to switch off between high and low points. I've mostly eaten the amount that makes me satisfied, which has ended up being higher on some days than others. So, I guess I just naturally mix it up, except for during PMS, when I tend to eat high every day.

I haven't seen "Finding Forrester", but that writing advice you quoted is pretty much what every writer does. Some edit as they go along, but most find that letting the editor in too soon stifles creativity. I'll keep an eye out for it, though. It sounds good.

I have to chuckle at your frustration about your hard-earned muscles not showing. I have the type of body that would only show muscle (especially in the abdomen) if I were underweight!! Even when I was on drill team in high school, in really good shape, and not overweight (despite family criticism to the contrary), my muscles didn't show. So, that's certainly not a goal of mine. But you go for it!!

Judy, congratulations on that letter. And glad to hear things are going good for you right now.

Lauren, I understand about financial styles being different. My dh and I are different, too. But we've had 25 years to work things out. Plus, we pretty much are too broke to have spending issues right now. This is a big issue for a lot of people and I admire your dedication to working it out.

I never thought about learning from other people as an approach to life that was unique. I sort of assumed other people did it, too. Interesting observation, Lauren.

Looking forward to reading about your meeting. Hope you'll post it after you get back, if you don't have time before you leave. Have a great time in Canada.

I'm doing well. I haven't followed my plan perfectly, but I've made substitutions that are equivalent point values. Yesterday I had to change my plan because my ds ate all of the salad that was left from dinner, which I had planned to have as part of my lunch. I got in my veggies because I had soup to substitute.

I went for a walk yesterday. It was really great to get out because we actually had some sunshine among the clouds. And it warmed up a little. So, it was a good walk. When I was at the store I picked up Entenmann's light (fat free) raspbery danish (1/8 of the coffeecake is 2 points) and it was quite good.

Have a great day!! Happy turtlin'!

Lin
272/249/244

Judy, I'm so glad you got that letter. I've had lots of teachers--current count is 13 different schools--and there are some teachers I think honestly made a huge impression on me. Not necessarily academically, either--my history teacher in high school, Mrs. Ickstadt, was the walking embodiment of a "lady". I admired her and think of her often. Good for you for having such an impact!

Lauren, whoa, that's our issue too. DH doesn't understand why we need to save anything--"Money is to enjoy in this life, we can't take it with us". One of my deep terrors, though, is being utterly broke and having no one to catch us if we fall. Having family that's highly unlikely, but it's still an underlying terror of mine (dunno why). So I try to save, he goes and spends, I REFUSE to argue about it so I'm constantly just quietly stating my case and leaving it on his head to make the decisions. Thankfully, he's come to me recently and suggested we start building an "emergency" fund. I pointed out that that means less toys, and he said okay. Progress!

Lin, you sound like you're doing great with substitutions and rolling with the punches. Congratulations on getting out for a walk, and feeling really positive. It must feel like your world is a little more steady, with these things getting settled.

Lin, there's another way we're different. I have heavy, large bones and very, very large muscles, I always have. I have a picture of myself at about 7 years old, and the thighs on me! Even when I wasn't lifting or doing focused exercise, I had pronounced muscles (thanks dad!). Even so high above my goal weight, I have soft little divots on my upper abs already. Losing the fat off the top will make me actually cut, which in my book is cooooooooooooooool. I went to Spinning this morning, and lifted for a half hour beforehand. I feel really great about this.

As for the high/low thing, I don't know how I managed to settle at almost the same points every day. But looking back through my journals, that's what's happened. *Sigh* You know, you'd think something would just WORK when you're not paying attention, wouldn't you? Anyway, for the week I'm at 117 points for 4 days, and have been up/down for 3 days. Not trying to hit a specific points count, understand, just in the general area of "high" (27-30) and "low" (21-24). The lower counts are actually really easy for me, since I don't have to work in meat. It's actually natural to me to have meals that are mostly vegetables. I'm also really paying attention, big time, to eating unprocessed foods. Not that I ever really did eat highly processed foods, but I'm watching any foods that didn't naturally "come that way". This means...more vegetables!

Have a good day, Turtles!

Okay, having scads of free time as I do right now (I earned it!) I have gone back through my journals since I started this go-round and mapped some things out. I took a calendar and wrote my daily points, total for the week, and loss/gain for that week into the days. I have discovered some [blatantly obvious] very interesting things in looking at the characteristics of loss weeks:

*no more than 1 day over 30 points, but consistently that day is near 40
*at least one (sometimes 2) day at 22-23
*the other days were all different points totals, not all the same number
*an average of 26-29 points a day, or 186-200 for the week

ALL the weeks with more than 1 day at or over 30 were gain/maintain weeks, no matter how low the other days were. Interesting.

So, for this week so far I have 29/29/37/22/27. Two more days left. Hmm. I have not weighed myself at all this month, and I don't intent to until the first. But I know how my body feels and looks, quite well actually, and I intend to pay attention. Wish me luck!

Hi, Turtles,

Erinl, your analysis was pretty interesting. Looks like you've found a pattern that will help you reach your goal. Just be sure that you don't get too low in protein when you do your low days. Remember how much trouble, healthwise, that was ror your a little while ago.

I'm doing well, especially when you consider how badly I've been doing recently. Yesterday I was under my planned points, but not under my point range. It's PMS and I'm adding those extra 4 points we talked about earlier to my range, if I need them. But I only used 2 yesterday. The day before I didn't even reach the top of my regular range, so it all balanced out anyway.

I didn't get a walk in yesterday, but I plan to today for sure. I went to Oxygen.com and found an interesting thing they have. It's a fitness planner. You put in your goals, your preferences, and your fitness level and they put together a fitness plan for you. I'm going to redo it and see if it comes up with some fun stuff, though. The plan it came up with for me is a WORKout. No aerobic dance stuff or swimming or anything like that. I want to see if that's because I'm at the beginner level or if it's because they didn't include that type of exercise in their plan in general.

But I can see that the place I need to make the most changes is in my exercise. (YUCK!). I've been trying to get in those three milk servings they recommend for women who are 50. I'm not quite 50, but pretty close and with osteoperosis running rampant in my family, I want to do this. But unless I drink 3 plain glasses of milk (or have it with cereal), the points, even for lowfat products, really add up. I can handle it now, but what will I do when I get to lower ranges? Well, the only thing I can think of is to get some extra activity points to cover it. Either that or give up some of the other foods I really enjoy. You all know how long that lasts with me!

I set a new goal that 's not related to the scale yesterday. My pants are uncomfortably tight because of PMS bloating combined with the weight I gained recently. They also are getting worn out. My goal is to replace them with a size smaller jeans and throw these ones in the garbage. (They're too worn to give to charity.) It's a good goal because I can chart my progress every day when I get dressed.

I've had to change my work schedule again. Staying up late isn't working well for a couple of reasons. One is that my ds gets chatty late at night and he gets insulted if I ask him not to talk to me because I'm working. And he's right in saying that it's one of the few times we can talk, which is important to both of us. The other is that getting up that much later in the morning doesn't allow me enough time to do what I need to do before my dh gets home. That's mainly because he's on such an early shift.

So, I'm going to drag myself out of bed at 5 am, to give me time for all of that morning stuff before I start writing at 7am. Starting my writing at 7 will let me get in enough hours and still have dinner on the table at a reasonable hour. And I'll have to do some of the chores in the evening. It means long days, but it's worth it to take my best shot at fulfilling a lifelong dream.

Today, though, I need to work a half day because I got so far behind in the chores last week when I was sick. Maybe I'll manage to get some more work done this evening to make up for the time. Otherwise, I'll just be patient with myself and do what I can.

Hope you all are having a great day!! Happy turtlin'!

Lin
272/249/244

Um, Lin, I feel the urge to yell at you now. Ready?

How badly you've been doing lately? EXCUSE ME? You haven't been doing badly at all, young lady! You've been coping effectively with major stressors, working through your grief, and taking the necessary steps to deal with future majors changes. You've been taking steps to pursue a lifelong dream in addition to caring for a family and a home. If you're not doing well, then I may as well give up now, because nothing I ever do will come close to comparing to the strength and perseverence you have displayed this last year and on a daily basis. You have shown incredible adaptability and doggedness and dedication, and a strength of character that is at times astonishing. Cut yourself some slack...because I say so!

There, how was that?

I have decided that low days are to be mostly protein and veggies, so I'm shooting for about 10 points of protein on those days. On the higher days it naturally happens (yes, I learned my lesson well!) but these last two low days I've had 10 and 9 points of protein, respectively.

Judy, Lauren, how are you doing?