I have been a member for almost a year now and this is my 1st post (copied from another thread from earlier) I'm putting myself out there....

I am in the most desperate state that I think I have ever been in my entire life. I eat and do nothing and yell at my boyfriend and drink too much and eat eat eat eat eat. I have always had issues with food and weight, these last few months my emotional well being has spiraled out of control and it seems like there is nothing I can tell myself to keep me away from food (BAD food) I pack healthy and try and eat healthy in front of Mike. I am sneaking and hiding food! This is the most shameful feeling I have ever felt. I am trying to make sense of my feelings to separate or identify what is happening to me.
My Boyfriend has all but lost his patience for my laziness and food control issues. When I talk to him I feel like he tears me down.

I just don't know...maybe getting in touch with some people who know what I'm going through will help. How do I get off the couch and put the junk down when I hate myself sooooo much??

Hi,
I understand where you are coming from. I, too, have had a rough few months after losing a job that I really loved plus the responsibily I feel being a caregiver for an aunt with Alzheimer's I also have a husband with a scary heart condition. I spent the last six months just kinda vegetating with no real direction and eating out of control. It sounds that you are like me... that eating out of control is the result of out of control feelings.
I finally just got sick of feeling as I did and decided to take action. I rejoined the gym and got back on my personalized food plan. At first, I had to force myself to take these actions, but now I feel myself coming out of the depressed state I was in. My problems are still there, and there will always be problems in life. The Serenity Prayer is always a good reminder for me that I can't control some things and that I need to recognize what I can control, which basically boils down to just me! I feel happier when I know that I am treating myself with respect and taking care of my body.
I hope you will consider taking those first steps back toward being healthier and happier. I know you can do it!

Maybe a talk with your family doc or a counseller to sort out where some of these feelings and anxieties are stemming from, you could be depressed, you could have thyroid issues or host of other things that may not be your fault (because we all tend to blame ourselves) ease up on yourself a little and talk to someone about what's going on.... keep your chin up!

Are these feelings still going on?

I looked into therapy and my insurance will not cover it. I was prescribed Prozac about a year ago and it didn't seem to do much and tanked my sex drive I switched insurance since so I think I will find a new doc. Though I am already feeling much better by just letting out what is going on in my head......it kinda takes the power out of it

I know that I was feeling really depressed this past year. Crying at work because I hate it and because I was in a bad relationship, just overall not happy with my life.

So, I asked my OBGYN about it and she put me on a birth control pill that apparently has some mood enhancement to it (Yaz). She also recommended B Complex and Evening Primrose Oil to start balancing out my hormones.

I'm feeling much better, not totally but I know it's finally time for me to start making some changes before I sink deeper in this.

I also just started walking around my apartment complex at night with a friend. Three times around is more than a mile. It's not much but it's a start!

I'm glad you're here. This is a safe place to share your thoughts and worries. Two things that might help: definitely check in with your new doc. There are lots of choices beside prozac and sometimes underlying medical conditions can contribute to our emotions. And check out the Chicks in Control forum.