Well - I have been talking for a long while (2 years or so) about how when the moment/time/alignment of the moon was right that I would like to run a race.

Apparently the other day the alignment was just right because I signed myself up to run a half-marathon in the spring. OMG - I am sitting here tonight asking myself "HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND?!?"

I felt so good about it when I did it - my best friend and I had been talking about it and had already started training and DH who has been a runner for freaking forever said he wanted to run it with me - so I plunked down $$$ and signed DH and myself up - my BF signed herself up.

Now - I am absolutely freaked.... I really want to do this - but to be honest - I am scared to death of failing - looking like an idiot. I keep telling myself that putting down the money and signing the committment is going to keep me focused.

I have my training plan - I bought the books over a year ago and have read them - broke them out and dusted them off and started reading them again. But I keep going back to what if I fail?

Be honest - do you think I bit off more than I can chew - did I set myself up for failure - waste a lot of money? I know I am whining and I am sorry for that but I am too embarrassed to tell my husband and my best friend that even though they did this to be supportive of me, that now I am scared.

Sounds you like already have support. It's easy to succomb to a giant case of the "what -ifs". However, instead of worrying about what you can't change, worry about what you CAN. You know you can read up and train and do the best you can do. You don't have to win, and your DH and BF know it's your first time. I would definitly tell them how you are feeling. I bet they can share support and even help you train, and you will feel so much lighter instead of like you are afraid alone. Ask them what their first experience was like. I bet it's similar.

Hang in there, don't give up and good luck! I will be excited to hear how you do and see (read) the look of accomplishment when you finish!

I am excited for you and can't wait to here how you are progressing. I run three miles every day but am wondering if it's even really possible for me to actually RUN 13.1 miles.

How far can you run right now? Is your training plan reasonable in the timeframe you have to train? I can run 5K, and I am currently training for an 8K for March. I was able to extend my training plan a little because it's not that much of a jump for me. Half marathon, girl! That is pretty awesome!!

Thanks so much - you all are right - I am getting a case of the "What-If's". I need to focus on what I can do and not give up before I start. I just want to be able to tell myself "You wanted to do it and you did."

It really did not get to me when I was planning out my training - because I was looking at it increments - but when I started looking at the map - it hit me... 13.1 miles - OMG - I can't do that..... it's not so intimidating when you are looking at traing schedule.

IrishRose - Right now - I can do 3 miles and not die - but I am working out 5 days a week right now - and I do cardio every day (not all running - I cross train, bike, cross ramp and I added the elliptical this week). I also lift weights.

As far as my training plan goes - I have four goal points:

January - 3.35 miles in 36 minutes (I am just about there)

February - 6.7 miles in 72 minutes

March - 10.05 miles in 108 minutes

April - 13.4 miles in 144 minutes

Mid-May is the race

I am training for a little bit faster than what I want to do on race day because I figure I am going to be nervous enough as it is - and I want to be able to run it on my own at least twice before race day so that I don't freak out.

I totally believe you can!

I have a good friend who went through boot camp for the Marine Corps last year. His attitude now is basically something's suck but you can do pretty much anything. He's in language school at the moment and woke up one morning to have his platoon leader announce they would be going on a 20 mile run before the end of the week. Oh and part of it was on the beach. Oh and at the end they had to run up the side of a mountain and then run back to base.

Now Marines are in good shape but not all of them are runners. They did have a couple injuries but for the most part the platoon came through just fine. Sore? Yes. Tired? Yeah. But alive and well for the most part.

I'm a big believer in the idea that we can do a LOT more than we think we can. Marines prove it every day, but so do a lot of normal folks.

One of the first things I thought of when I read your post was a blog, back in the early days of blogging, about two ladies who biked from Boston to California. They blogged nearly every day and uploaded the results as they had internet access. It's an amazing story. You can still go to the website and read the posts starting at day 1. They talk about their fears and excitement and you see all the ups and downs as they go. You can Google "Intrepid Bikers" or click this link (I'm still not sure about the rule on links here so i'm assuming it might get deleted.) Both of them kept separate journals. When I read it I'd read one for the day then flip to the other so I could see both of their thoughts/interpretations.

I think anyone can be motivated by their story but Randi I think in particular you will find it a great support as you train!

Thanks for the support! Rodeogirl - thank you for the link - I am definitely going to be reading their stories....

I did end up talking to my friend and she definitely gave me some support - she told me that if I ended up walking she would be right there beside me. I did not say anything to DH yet - don't know if I will, between you ladies and my friend I am feeling a lot better. Hubby and I are supposed to workout together this weekend, I am going to quiz him a bit more about the races that he has run.

Thanks again and I will definitely be telling you all about my progress.... if I get to boring just let me know....

Clap your hands if you believe....CLAP CLAP CLAP!

Let me know how you like that blog - I think it's one of the best things I've read on the web.

First of all, I just want to say I think it's great you've done this.. A couple of years ago I psyched myself all up that I was going to run a 5k, and not only did I quit the training before I got up to running 5k but I never signed up for a race. So I know what it is to be afraid of failure, or whatever it was that stopped me. And I'm sure if you follow the program you've set out for yourself, you will be successful.

But having said that... let's answer this question you are worried about...



Worst case scenario: You get a pain in your leg or something after 2k, and drop out. So what?? You just keep on going, sign up for another one, whatever. Life will go on right? There is nothing to be afraid of.

Think of those Olympic athletes who train their whole lives for an event that takes seconds and they screw up somehow or something goes wrong and they can't complete their event. They survive the disappointment, and that is their whole LIVES, their jobs, everything they've been thinking about for years. And they survive. So I'm sure you will!

You've got the time to train and the support of those around you - I think you'll do great! But like futuresurferchick says, if something happens in this race then you'll do great the next time.