I was hoping this wouldn't happen this year but here I am. Little history, I had severe postpartum depression in 2006. Have fully recovered but seem to have relapse in Dec. Dec. 5 2007 I became really depressed. Couldn't sleep, eat, had awful anxiety. Crying spells, not wanting to do anything, anxious at how messy my house is, the whole nine yards. Saturday night I felt it starting. I had been out with friends earlier that night and drank which I never do. Didn't sleep that night and have been in a funk since. Something about this time of year. I went to the doctor yesterday and I was in there on dec. 5 last year for this. I have lost 6 pounds in a week because I can't eat This just sucks. I have to hide in the bathroom to cry so my children don't see me. Its suppose to be a happy time. I started taking omega 3's, vit b12, vit d and some other things my doc has put me on. I know I will get over it but its the waiting. Last night was the first night I slept. I would drift to sleep only to wake up with my heart racing over and over again. I don't know why I posted this, just felt like I needed to get it out.

I also get depressed during this time of the year until I learned that I had severe Vit D deficiency. So, my best advice to you is check your Vit D levels. I know exactly how this feels, I hope you get well soon.

I know what it is like to have PPD. I hope you feel better soon.

Having a wonky brain just sucks! I have depression, anxiety and adhd. My symptoms are pretty well manage right now. I've had two episodes of major depression and moderate post partum with my 2nd pregnancy.

I get crazy ideas sometimes when I've felt great and just go off my meds. Somehow I like to think that maybe this time I'm "healed" or something. For months I feel fine and then something triggers it again and I feel that black yuck creeping back.

I applaud you for posting what you did here. Being in touch with others is such a big help. One thing I've found that helps when I'm feeling crummy is to do something that takes a lot of mind power. It seems to make the depressive feelings not be so prominent or watch a really funny movie or one with a deep plot you need to follow.

Hang in there!!

I too suffer from anxiety and it gets really bad this time of year. I find if I keep super busy it helps. Also just a plain aspirin helps. If it gets super bad I take .25mg, (smallest dose made) of Xanax which my doctor prescribed for me. It REALLY helps, but I fear dependence on them, so I take them ONLY when I feel like I'm about to completely fall apart. I hate the feeling of anxiety, it's horrible. I quite drinking alcohol, smoking, and now lost lots of weight thinking each thing might be the cause...but nothing makes it go away completely....(except xanax). Mine is definitely female hormone related. Doctor says he thinks I'm perimenopausal. I'm 43 and this has been going on for 5 years now.

Hang in there. I know it sucks, but just take it one day at a time and hopefully you'll be rid of it as soon as the stress of the holidays is over.

crazy, I went through moderate PPD in 2001. My doctor put me on meds the day I delivered my next child. Did yours not offer this option to you? Once you have had PPD, your chances for relapse are great.


eta:supplements are great but if you have a history of "severe" PPD, you really shouldn't chance it.

Crazy, Michelle, and Lori Bell,
I am so with you guys. I have battled depression and anxiety for years. I have taken meds off and on over the years when I felt I needed to. The depression would return. Sometimes, I got through on my own and sometimes I went back on meds. This year I needed the meds and I am on a new one called Pristiq. I feel great!! I feel solid and stable. I am able to deal with things so much better and I fight with and yell at my hubby and kids WAY less. It has been such a blessing. I also have Xanax to take when I really need it and that has also been a lifesaver. And I am finding that the longer I am on the Pristiq, the less I need the Xanax.
The bottom line for me is this - I have read a lot of posts from people who list different ways of fighting depression without medication. For them, that's great. But I truly believe that some of us need that extra help from the meds. I am one of those people and I refuse to be ashamed of that fact.
Crazy, there are so many different things you can try. I'm sure that in many cases, supplements and exercise and other things can help. But if you've been through this before, you probably KNOW what you need to do. Just don't hesitate. And if meds are what you need, don't feel bad. Do what you need to do for you and your children.

Susan

Hon, your doctor can help get you through this, no need to suffer

.

lots of people find this season particularly difficult and you not getting any sleep is not going to work. even if you dont feel tired your body is probably screaming out for some sleep even if it's just a couple of hours. once you start to get that you may start to feel just a bit better.

whatever happens, i'm sending hugs your way