Hi,

My name is Maria, and as my title says I'm here to try and finally give weight loss- well really a healthy life style another go. I've been unsuccessful so many times before so its a bit scary to be trying again only because of the potential that it could be another failure, but I must try anyway- and from what I've seen this site really supports just making positive life choices and maintaining a healthy lifestyle which is so wonderful cause I've tried and failed at diets and fasts and cutting out one food after another. I really just want to learn good life habits, to enjoy food and for it not to be a source of constant struggle and depression.

Maria

feel free to stop reading here. The following is a bit about my weight loss journey.



In a nutshell I first started eating emotionally while I was a crew member on a tall ship for 5 months at the age of 16. I was so homesick, had no friends, could not contact my family, was trying to do school, learn how to sail and visiting many diverse and culturally shocking places simultaneously. REally the only friend I had was food, and it alone I could count on to bring some happiness to my day. I gained 15 pounds and was devastated (because I'd always been lean) but just knew I'd loose it when I went home. I really didn't think there would be any problem (oh how naive I was to the struggles of weightloss) I had never not been able to do what I set my mind to.

So I came back and worked really really hard to loose the 15 pounds for when I went to see the ship 5 months later. It was not a happy experience and I realized how hard it was and felt like I was failing all the time because I wouldn't stick exactly to plan. I think it was then that I even realized that I had some problems. To compensate I developed even worse habits liking fasting (the longest 5 days) and would eat hardly anything for a day and then binge on junk like crazy. I cut out chips chocolate candy for those 5 months but then would find other sweets like icing to binge on. Once I realized I was totaly consumed but weightloss and food I just was exhausted and admitted defeat and stopped making food such a focus- which was great emotionally- but I slowly gained back the weight and put way more on. Since then I've tried about 3 or four times to seriously do something and develop good habits and loose weight but somehow I always have motivation for about a week and then it dwindles and the cheap chocolate bars and ice cream provide a more immediate comfort.

What triggered my attempt at reformation this time was my binging on chocolate bars from Halloween. I had absolutely no energy and just wanted to sleep all the time I wasn't working. Then I remembered that more than half of what I was eating a day was chocolate. I know its a common fact that what we eat affect our moods, energy, motivation etc. but really and honestly this was the first time I was actually aware of the connection with my own body. And while it was depressed me that I had absolutely no motivation (as I haven't for the past 2 years which is quite unlike me previously) a hope was lit- that maybe I could actually take an active role to restore some of my health and energy and motivation and surprisingly enough that food could be this vehicle.
I began to think seriously (just think- because I didn't want to commit to whimsically and then fail again) about maybe trying to retackle this issue and learn to eat healthily. While I was thinking I realized how alone I felt and really how alone I was. I can't talk about this to anyone, no one I know understands- I'm surrounded my super fit and healthy thin people (which is what I was before I learned and continued my bad habits from the ship) But I thought there must be other people who feel the same way I do and perhaps we could help each other. So I decided to add another ingredient to my new attempt- a support network, a place where I can be understood- basically 3FC!
So Hello everyone! Pleased to meet you!

I appologize this is so long. More than anything I needed to write that out for my own benefit to show to myself that I'm serious about making positive permanent changes, and that this is for real. Basically I can't back down as I've told goodness knows how many people about my food struggles.

If anyone has any advice, tips, things they want to share, similar or different storys etc. feel free to enlighten me I will also be wandering around this site and am excited to read all the forums.

Thanks and see you around online

Maria

p.s. Could someone tell me how to put my little sig weight tracker thing at the bottom of this?

Hi Maria! First I wanted to say that that sounds like an awesome job!

Welcome to 3FC. If you've done some reading, you'll already know what a wonderful place this is for information and support. And yes, a lot of that info is just about eating better food. And yes, a lot of that info is about folks with an unhealthy relationship with eating.

Make yourself at home. Read lots and ask questions. We're here to help.

And signatures ... after several posts and 20 days (I think).

You CAN do this! Glad you found us, and post often so we get to know you

Welcome, Maria!

Wow, what a cool job. But I'm so sorry that was a time of stress for you.

It sounds like you're really thinking things through. My only suggestion is that you not tackle everything at once. Change a few things a week, and you'll start to develop habits that will stick. ie: add 10 minutes of exercise to your day, commit to eating one extra vegetable/fruit a day, etc. Small things that will add up to big changes in your life.

And please keep posting... we're very glad to have you join us. We're all in this together.

Hey Maria. I am glad you are here. This place is instrumental for me at this point and probably will be for some time to come. Our stats are similar. Do you mind me asking what size pant you are in now? I am trying to figure out if I tend to be more muscular or flabby or what in relation to other women with my stats.

On the boat thing, was that a study program by chance? I am looking into that for a family member--semester at sea program.

HI,

Thanks for the welcome!

There are a number of Ship Programs out there. Semester at sea is I believe more of a cruise ship type deal. I was on a tall ship. For tall ship programs there is Class Afloat which I believe is the best, you can do that for either a semester or a year in either gr. 11, 12 or University. For a more short term thing there is SALTS on the West coast of Canada- they run programs throughout the summer. There is also the Picton Castle which is specifically a tall ship crew training ship- though I wouldn't recommend this as much unless you're looking for just intensive sail training.

About pant sizes, I purposely avoid pants and wear so many skirts and leggings and dresses. haha.The pants I do own however are 11/12. I carry most of my weight in my stomach area though so I need the 11/12 to fit around my waist.