Okay, here's my situation. I've told my family and friends and most of all my fiance about my goal to lose weight. The biggest problem I have is in my belly area which is where it seems I store all my fat. I've heard time and time again that that area is the most dangerous to store fat, and to add to it, we have a hugely expansive history of heart problems running through both sides of my family (my grandpa actually just had four surgeries in two weeks last month to combat a seriously clogged aorta). I am 147 lbs at 5'7" but I know in my heart that even though that number doesn't seem dangerously high, a lot of that weight is fat and not muscle, which is bad. I've explained all of this to the people who are close to me and none of them will support me. They keep telling me "oh, you look fine" and "No, you don't need to lose any weight" because I think that's what they think I want to hear. But what I really want is their support, and someone to push me (because I am an award-winning procrastinator). Is there anything I can do to push them to push me? Should I just turn to you folks for motivation? Am i completely lost and hopeless?!?! (j/k)

In seriousness though, I don't know what to do. I'm the type of person who needs someone riding my rear to make me do something I don't want to do and I'm just not getting that from anyone. Any help/advice/support is more than welcome. Sorry for the rant.

With the fact that 60% of the US (and other westernized nations aren't far behind) are obese, it is really hard to judge what we should be. Often people who are a healthy weight are told they are too skinny because it is abnormal these days.

As far as your own weight loss goes, you really do need to be your own motivation. No one else can tell you what you need to do and you can't depend on anyone else to push you.

Stop telling people you want to lose weight. Nelie is right and for her reasons, your people are unlikely to help you. The only way you are likely to get encouragement is if you say you are trying to 'eat healthy and exercise - to keep fit.' And say it is because of the heart problems that run in the family. It is your own business if you end up losing weight, but nobody can fault you if you're only trying to live a healthier lifestyle. My concern is having your people sabotage you, as they think you're fine the way you are.
You may have to fly in the face of adversity. I wish you luck.

Life is full of things we don't want to do but have to anyway. If you can't do those w/out someone "riding your rear", then you're going to have more problems than just losing weight.

I don't mean that harshly, but just as a statement of fact. No one else is responsible for you except YOU. Asking others to ride herd on you to make sure you do what you need to is unfair to them and to you.

When YOU want to lose weight for YOU ... that's the time that you'll push yourself to do it and stick with it.

.

kelly
Many people need a kick in the can from time to time to get going. lol, I can be one of those people too. Losing weight, getting in shape, eating a healthy diet and exercise is something that comes from deep inside us. We have to do it for us and no one else. You have great reasons to want to get in shape. I truly understand. Heart problems gallop in my family.

Eat the required amounts of the four basic food groups. You will find it takes a whole lot of eating to fulfill those requirements. If you do not eat meat products, there are things you can eat to fulfill that group anyway. Fitday is a great site to track what you are eating. Plan tonight what you are going to eat tomorrow. That way you get all the food in you want to eat and you can stay within some ranges that you set for yourself.

Exercise, I have read a healthy person needs to do aerobic exercise 30 min 5 days a week and resistance training 30 min twice a week to have a healthy body. What does that tell us lol, most of us need to do a lot more than that to get to the healthy body stage.

I happen to love Leslie Sansone and swear by her Walk Away The Pounds ( Toning ) With Leslie Sansone For The Abs 10 Minutes Ab Buster workout. It comes with a belt with stretch tubes with handles. I have seen remarkable results using this. I do it twice in a row in the morning and then twice in a row in the evening two days a week. Might not work for everyone but I can say it has really worked for me in the tummy area.

Some of us need a kind word from time to time. Some of us need understanding and support. Some of us need a kick in the can and to be told we need to stop talking about it and do it. Here is your kick in the can.

You can't make people support you. You can't make anyone do anything. Sometimes in life we have to do what is right for us just because we should.

At 147, sure, you could take off a few pounds -- but you probably aren't going to want to take off more than ten or so unless you are VERY light framed. You and I are the same height, and at 137 I am a size 4/6. At 130 I am a size 2.

It sounds like what you really need is some strength training and some cardio to redistribute your weight and give you some toning -- building up that lean muscle mass.

I agree with those who have said it before. Only you can motivate you. Stop telling your family and friends and just do it for you. Tell the rest of them that you are getting more fit and eating better to live a long healthy life and protect your heart. The rest of it doesn't need to concern them.

Honestly, I think it's fair of you to try and enlist the help and support of those who are close to you. When I began my journey almost 5 years ago, I told everyone, "If you care for me, when we're together, no matter what you're eating, PLEASE don't offer me any." That alone was enough support from "others" to help me feel like those people actually care about me and my goal. Granted, I was WAY heavier than you, so no one was telling me "Oh, why do you want to lose weight? You don't need to!" but still. Maybe what you need isn't so much a kick in the @ss, but for those around you a lot - - like you friends, fiance, parents -- to not make your weightloss attempt any harder for you.

It also seems like you just need to start working out -- to tone up and burn off fat and replace it with muscle. You might actually get heavier when you start replacing that fat with muscle, but you'll be leaner and that's what counts.

That's what I'd say, too! Get yourself a membership at the YMCA or some other healthy gym, or take up walking, folk dancing... take some exercise classes... go swimming... Be physically active every day in some way. I think if you do that AND track what you're eating in some way, like with the FitDay tracker, you'll find that you will soon look slimmer and feel lots better as well as lose some pounds!

But don't put it in terms of weight--health is your real goal, isn't it? Everyone can understand that.

Jay

Kellybelly,

Hire yourself a buttkicker! A trainer or dietician may be what you need, especially if you explain that you want them to push you! I also would put it to your friends and family in terms of health, not looks!

YOU are responsible for losing weight, not someone else pushing you. The hand that puts the food in your mouth is on your body. Make yourself responsible and don't depend on someone else to police you.