Dear Dryer,
I'm writing to ask you why you are so cruel. I bought you a few years ago, gave you a home in a nice, clean laundry room. I even let you live next to your friend, the washer. Yet, still you mistreat me.
I feed you well, with my shirts, pants, even my unmentionables. (I won't even go into the socks you have stolen from me.) The main purpose for my letter is to ask you why you must make my pants fit me so tight. I've been nothing but kind to you. And this is the thanks I get? Your cruelty knows no bounds.
I bought a pair of black pants last week. They fit me beautifully - so comfortable, and flattering. The washer took wonderful care of them, getting them nice and clean for their next wearing. Then I turned them over to you. You somehow managed, perhaps as a cruel joke, to turn these perfectly nice pants into some sort of straight-jacket for my legs and waist. I'll have you know I cursed you as I squeezed into them this morning, and remain bitter toward you even now, as I sit at my desk, holding my breath a little in the hopes of lessening their strangle hold on my mid-section.
From now on, I will hang my clothes to dry.
With much hatred,
Carinna




The sadly part was because it's a true story. 
