Hi everyone,

I came across this website and was suddenly inspired after reading lots of posts by people struggling with their weight. I was at a point where I felt totally discouraged and jaded and just OVER IT... weight loss has been a lifelong journey for me, starting from the age of 12.

My story: I was chubby my whole life, then I was diagnosed with depression a couple years ago, and I ballooned to my heaviest weight. It was a vicious cycle of depression and weight gain, and I was spiraling downwards, cutting off ties with people out of shame, feeling like I was doomed... I binge ate like it was my job, because food was the only thing that made me feel better... for a little while. Soon I wasn't just depressed but also fat and I felt like the lowest thing on Earth. My mom decided I should come home for a while and recuperate in the comforts of home so I went home for two months. During the two months, my medication started kicking in and I felt a bit better. But I also began an intense program of running, everyday for an hour, and strength training with a personal trainer twice a week. I also decided to cut out all carbs from my diet, no sugar, no junk food, no bread... For reasons beyond my understanding I was able to continue this extreme diet for two months and I lost 20 pounds, gained tons of muscle and felt AWESOME. I thought I had cured myself through exercise... which may have been true.
Then I came back to SF, started working again, living on my own... soon enough I was turning to food for emotional support... I swore never to go back to my unhealthy ways but stress got the best of me. I binge ate my way through 6 months or so and I gained everything back, plus some more. And I felt my depression creeping back up on me... and now I feel like it's back. My confidence is shot... my body image is horrible... I am SO discouraged and tired and I feel like crying whenever I think about my life.

It's time for me to really WANT it. Because that's what it comes down to, right? To ACT on my desires, and to actually get up and burn some calories, eat healthier, instead of looking at photos of myself when I was thin and wishing, and hoping. It's not gonna get me anywhere. I joined 3FC hoping to continue being inspired by everybody's efforts... and hopefully be supported... as well as to support everybody else.

Thank you so much for reading my long post! I look forward to reading and writing!

chickennugget126
michellenew

I'm new here, too, and I totally feel where you're coming from. I've been dieting on and off since I was in junior high too. And I battled depression a few times like you. You're not alone!
I'm temporarily living in Japan and all these tiny little people make me feel even MORE like a cow than I did before!
But I just try to stay positive and think about how the lifestyle here is already making me lose weight. I pray that when I go back to the U.S. I won't gain it all back.
I know you can do it, even if it takes a long time. Just remember, even tiny steps are progress. Celebrate every forward step and don't dwell on it if you slip a little backwards. Stay strong!

You CAN do this. You may want to check out the Chicks in Control section, or if you're going to continue to cut out most carbs then the Low Carb area under Diet Central. Either way, please post wherever you're comfortable.

Best of success!

Thanks everyone!
I can tell that visiting this website and reading everyone's kind words of support are going to be a real help already.

Faerie-- I will definitely check out those forums you mentioned. Thanks!

Genki -- No way, I grew up in Japan and lived there until I was 18! I'm half Japanese... but yeah, TELL ME ABOUT IT. I had issues my whole life trying to fit in with all the skinny japanese people... knowing all along that my body was just different. I always have a panic session before going to visit my family in Japan, and go on extreme diets to try and lose some weight so that I dont' feel like a whale. The best advice I can give you is... we are all different and our bodies are different... and that is nothing to be ashamed of. I learned the hard way that I should stop trying to fit the typical mold of size 0's in Japan and just be happy with my curves.
And don't forget to enjoy the yummy food while you're there...