I'm new and need some help

  • I'm trying to do this on my own and my boyfriend does not realize how hard this is for me. He makes me feel bad like I'm feeling sorry for myself. This is not the case. I am stepping up to the plate and trying to better myself by losing weight. Sometimes I want to give up and he is not the right person to help!!!!


  • First of all, welcome to 3FC. This is a fantastic place to find the support you're looking for while you go through your weight loss journey. There are tons of different places here to explore, jump in on anything at any time!

    Second of all, I'm sorry to hear your BF is not being supportive. That can make it very difficult to do this, when you're not getting the support you need at home. Just know that YOU are worth it, that YOU deserve this, and he has no control over it! Do this for yourself. It's not a sign of feeling sorry for yourself -- it's actually more of a sign of respecting your body enough to want to help it run more efficiently and be healthy and energetic. It's too bad he can't see all the positives that come along with deciding to lose weight!

    Like I said, we're here for you when you need us. You've made an awesome decision and I hope you stick to it.

    So have you joined WW? Are you doing it from home or are you going to meetings? How are you finding it so far?
  • i'm so glad you're here. this site is full of supportive, knowledgable and fun people who can help you out. i would encourage you to join a regular group to check in with daily, as well as browsing different threads throughout the site for help and encouragment. whatever you do, don't give up!!!

    do you have any friends that you can turn to for a little support other than your BF? sounds like he doesn't have a weight problem - sometimes people can't identify with a problem they've never experienced. but that doesn't give him the right to put you down!

    choosing to lose weight and be healthier is not feeling sorry for yourself. when he makes you feel like that, stand up to him and tell him exactly why you're doing this. tell him that it's hard work, but you are strong enough to do it. and you are a beautiful person who is worth taking care of!

    this is a long journey, and we've all run into people who make us want to give up. it's even harder when it's someone close to you. but you can do this despite what he says! make a list of the reasons why you want to lose weight and use that list as a way to motivate yourself when you get frustrated.

    remember - losing weight is more than just looking good. it's feeling good emotionally and mentally, being healthy, lowering your risk for health problems, building self-confidance with each pound you lose, and making some great friends on 3FC along the way!
  • Thanks you guys! That makes feel really good. All though I have not officially joined WW, I am trying to follow the program. I do think going to meetings will help me.
  • Just wanted to say "welcome". And post whenever you'd like! Let us know how things are going.
  • Thanks
  • Hang in there!
    I know how hard it is to want your loved one's support and not receive it in the way you expect. My DH has never had a weight problem (in fact he is quite slight of build), so he doesn't understand how ovewhelming the task ahead can seem. One thing that has really helped me is that my sister, my best friend, and I are sharing recipes, weight loss successes- and disappointments and sending cards to one another through snail mail. For me, online support is great, but having that tangible card to post on my bulletin board at work is helpful too.
    Going to WW meetings helps me b/c I do not know a lot of people in the town where we live (my husband's home town) and the meetings have helped me to make some new connections with other women for support.

    Keep posting and draw strenghth from the ideas everyone has to share.
  • welcome!!!
  • Welcome to the group! Maybe your boyfriend has some issues of his own to deal with. When I first started WW my husband was not supportive AT ALL! It seems that whenever one of his friend's wives lost weight and started working out, she ended up leaving him for someone else. So it made my DH kinda paranoid. Thankfully he's gotten over it, and although we still have to keep all his favorite snack things in the house, he doesn't get all bent out of shape if I don't share them with him. Now that I've been at goal for a couple of years, he is much more respectful of how much work I've put in to stay in shape. And believe me, once you pass 40 it gets tough!!

    Stay strong and stick to your plan. There is a lot of great support here when you need it.