Hi Everyone,
I wanted to share my experience in making my first Step 9 amends. It was to my husband of more than 20 years.

First it was very intimidating and felt like digging up bad memories I caused and how I hurt him in the past.

Then as I started explaining to him about how making amends is more than saying you are sorry it is about a promise of change. That is the magic of Step 9 in my opinion. The promise of changing behaviors within the relationship so harm is never done to him again because of my desease and behavior.
Very, very powerful stuff. I would not recommend trying it until you have solidly done steps 1-8 with the guide of a Sponsor.
Now I am on to the next people on my Harms List.
Stay tuned.
Bumps

Good job Bumps--
Making amends is scary, and many folks avoid it. Of course, that also means that they avoid recovery and freedom. So, Awesome job!

The first amends that I made was with my husband too. I went into it thinking it would be the easiest...Nope. With honesty, unselfish love, and commitment to change, it was the hardest of them all -- perhaps because I hurt him the most, or perhaps because I love him the most.