Hey everyone. I'm struggling with my own weigh but wanted to share this feeling I have hoping some of you might have a say about it. I have a 15 year old daughter, we lived with my mom for a while after my divorce and then just us for a while. then mom moved back and now im married again, mom lives with us but will move out soon (yay!). The thing that bothers me is that I see myself in my daughter, she's overweigh, not too much, but enough to make her very self aware and especially these days that most teenagers look like toothpicks, and we both are bigger and taller than the average guatemalan. So I feel so guilty, I know I should have been more careful while she was growing up not to let her gain so much weight, i dont want her to go through what i went through, all the insecurities, tears, low self esteem etc. And I feel I have no control, I feel like I have no power and no control over my own self and guilt makes me feel even worse. At the same time I'm so afraid she will suffer because of her weight. I want to stop feeling guilty and want to do something about it, but don't know what.

We had a thread discussion of this a little while back. Tons of great ideas and suggestions. Maybe you can revive the thread/discussion with a new post? Its in the weight watchers forum, but there were a lot of non-weight-watchers folks weighing in.

http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=122971

to you. Its a hard question, and I understand how upsetting and frustrating it can be to feel like your daughter is headed toward a path you know was so painful. Check out the thread and see if any of the ideas apply to you.

Maybe a Mom/Daughter walk each night will help out. Keep you both healthy and exercising but not overdoing it with dieting and calorie counting for you daughter. Walking can do amazing things!

Great idea there CAT!

I was chubby in high school and my mom was a little overweight so we went on walks together like Cat is talking about and it was great. We both lost weight and it was so fun. We bonded so much during those walks. Give it a try.

Take control together. Start choosing better foods: fresh veggies, lean meats, whole grain breads, oatmeal, that kind of stuff. Look over your recipes, and make them healthier. I've figured out how to make tamales without lard (cook the corn, then put it in a blender when it's still hot. Then just go on as normal. I add chicken breast meat, boiled egg whites, an olive, and red pepper. No one can tell the difference.

You would be amazed at the results of just simply eating healthier food. I have more energy, my skin looks great, my hair as well. And likely you'll lose weight.

But do this together. Tell her she's beautiful, don't make her feel bad. Tell her that you want to get healthier, so the house is going to be free of all junk food. Tell her you want her help. Make her an active participant in this.

I'm also taller than your average Peruvian, so I can understand where you're coming from. When I was heavier I was your regular sideshow freak out here! Good luck and keep us updated!