Okay so my hair is pin straight and not fussy at all. I don't have a stylist I go to on a regular basis, I just use whatever person is free when I need my appointment. I'm not picky at all....just trim it, DONE! But I hate, HATE, that every stylist needs to tell me that my hair has damage and what I should and should not be doing. Sweetie, look in the mirror, YOUR hair isn't that wonderful either! My hair is not Angelina Jolie material, but it's okay...see avatar...it's CUTE DAMNIT!!! '"You shouldn't color your hair at home"......"Oh, don't blowdry everyday!!" (AS SHE IS PULLING OUT THE DRYER TO DRY MY HAIR) "do you use a curling iron?". When a simple "ohh, this conditioner would really work on your", would suffice, instead they go into a whole song and dance why my hair SUCKS and my head should be shaved. The only time my hair was ever immediately visably damaged was after I had $260 highlights done at the salon and they left the foil in too long and my cute layers turned into a weird crispy crown thing, so no thanks, I think I'll stick to myself and my $7 box of Nice and Easy, LADY!

Yep. Agree 100%

I once had a hairdresser who was washing my hair and felt the need to ask if I'd ever gotten my eyebrows waxed. I told her that I get them done "professionally" every other month or so.... and I do them at home in between times. She laughed..... SHE LAUGHED!!! Then proceeded to tell me that she could tell it was time to get it done again!??!??!?!?!?!?!?!?? Then while cutting my hair she kept going over to another hairdressers stand and whispering to her... I saw her once swipe her finger across her eyebrow as she was looking at me talking to this other lady..... and trust me, my eyebrows weren't bad..... at all..... if I let them grow, I'd have a uni-brow - but I never let them get that bad.

I was SOOOOOOOOO mad. Not sure why they think that a license to cut hair is a license to be the "beauty police".

By the way, this lady had YELLOW (not blonde as it was intended) YELLOW highlights...... HA!

I do agree that some hairdressers have crappy hair, and shouldn't be a pot calling the kettle black-BUT-as a person who went to cosmetology school and managed a salon, I can agree 100% that someone shouldn't color their own hair in 98% of all cases.

The reason why, is because most people put it on all over. Every time. The roots of your hair have been colored once, but the ends, if you have long hair, have been processed 20-100 times, if you color regularly. No amount of conditioner can help that. If you ever see a woman who dyes their hair brown, but as you go down the shaft of their hair, the ends are slowly more brittle, fuzzy, and even 2 shades darker than the roots-this is a prime example of that. Women who dye blonde over and over again get the medium blonde at the roots, lighter in the middle, and finally that cotton textured, white fuzzy ends at the tips. It is from coloring all over, over and over, instead of roots only.

Also, a box of store coloring is one box for all-and a professional coloring doesn't work that way. If a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all walked into the salon and wanted color 407 dark golden brown, I would mix the formula differently for each one of them, to get them the same shade. If you have a jar of white paint, tan paint, and brown paint, you are going to have to add different things to each one of them, in different amounts, to make them all the same shade.

All box color for instance, contains 20 volume developer. Salons have 10, 20, 30, and 40 volume-depending on how many shades lighter or darker the hair needs to go up or down.

There is more to it than one might think...

Oh I know! I completely understand that coloring can be damaging, that's what makes me mad when she tells me, I'm almost 26 (and she's what, 18?), I've figured it out!! But once she says "oh you have damage" and I giggle and say "oh I know"...then shut your trap! Don't say "oh my" as you loudly snap a knot, while sighing, from my wet head after creating it yourself by brushing from the top and not the bottom. At home, I don't snap anything, EVER, be more careful and stop trying to use my poor hairs to prove your point!

I know what you mean about hair dressers.I have yet to find someone I really like...and even hate going to get my hair cut.I get the"oh,did you know your hair is really damaged?",even when I don't color and get regular trims.Or when they ask what kind of shampoo and conditioner you use....no matter what you say,they bash the brand and tell you you need something they sell.Sorry,I can't afford,nor is my hair so precious that I need to spend $10.00 or more on shampoo.

What really gets me though are the ones who ask me what I want done with my hair,and when I ask what they suggest....they haven't a clue.I can get a simple trim from some inexpensive place...but when I'm going to spend alot of money to get my hair CUT and styled...I want SOME sort of input.I don't know what kind of cut will look good on my face.I can't even find up to date books to look through...or books at all with hair cuts in some places.I don't think I've ever had a style...because I have no clue what would look nice on me It's long and straggly looking atm....blech!

Problem is that these girls probably work at the mall and they are SO PRESSURED by management to sell, sell, sell. Which is why I'm opening my own shop. I can just cut hair and make people look good without all the pressure.

I've been going to the same hair dresser for over 10 years and she has never said my hair is damaged. She and her helper have said things like "your hair really blonds up easily" (when getting highlights) and "wow, your hair is easy to straighten." I can't imagine them telling me otherwise. It makes me think that these folks have been trained to say things like that in order to sell more product. (I'm assuming that you're going to a chain place rather than an independent salon.)

As for the actual style, there are times when I come in with what I think will look cute on me and it does and I keep the style for years. Then there are times when I come in with a look that I think will look good on me and she cuts it just like the photo and I hate it. I'm there right now. ugh. It is NOT her fault that I hate it, but I just don't have the courage to call her up and ask for a re-cut. I think I'll wait it out another 2 weeks and then call for an appointment. Yeah, I know, I'm a coward!

I agree about the importance of finding a hairstylist you can get along with.

I've had two in my life - one in my hometown (she was GREAT - loved my hair, never gave me crap about coloring it myself, etc) and one where I currently live. I let her color my hair now (she is also a personal friend, so I get the "friends and family" discount, making it reasonable for me to get professional color...otherwise I'd still be doing it myself), but she is very complimentary of my hair and the condition it's in, even when I ask her directly (like - I have all of these shorter/flyaway pieces...whats causing that? - "oh, well a good amount of it is that weight loss messes with your hair growth cycle a bit, so you have a large amount growing in at once now that you are maintaining"...she compliments the weight loss AND explains the problem so I feel better). She also lies to me about the gray in my hair ("You only have two gray hairs, exactly as many as last time" - its a total lie, but I love her for it).

You really have to find a salon and person you are comfortable with. It makes ALL the difference in the world.

To answer the shampoo question-you don't have to use a $10 shampoo, but the *super* cheap ones, such as VO5, White Rain, etc. contain cheaper ingredients that are not as good for your hair.

My main suggestion is not to buy the cheapest shampoo available. If it is $1.27, then it is $1.27 for a reason. You can get a decent mid-priced brand for $3-$5.

The best thing, regardless of whether you use a store or a salon brand, is to use the kind that is for your hair type. If your hair is colored, it is best to use one meant for colored hair-because they are gentler, and prevent the color from fading out as fast...

I have to say that I LOVE my hairdresser, she is sweet & has been cutting my hair for over 10 years, from the time that I cut off the length which was to my lower back.
She even compliments me on my home coloring job--though I am very upset that the color by Feria that I was using is no longer on the shelf where I shop and I have had no luck finding it elsewhere.
She has left a more expensive salon that was getting ready to up the prices again to a smaller one where she feels it is more affordable for her clients. This is her third change and I will continue to follow her.

Aphil--I have to agree with the cheap shampoos--I sometimes splurge and buy Biolage, but mostly stick in the mid range ones at Walmart and I believe that is the reason my hair is healthy even with the at home dye jobs.

i think finding a good hairdresser is hard at times..but i've been lucky...because i find one that will do what my hair needs. And i persoanally find that you pay for what you get when it comes to shampoos and things. I don't think they are necessarily trying to "push products on you..maybe some are...but here's my opinion...i'm a veterinarian...and there are certain products i love and use on my own animals because i find the importance they have in my pets life. So i do discuss to my clients these products when i'm in the room with them. So may see it as trying to "push" a product..and maybe you can see it that wya...but i don't. If i believe in a product, and have faith in what it will do...i highly recommend it. That's why when i find a great hairdresser...i take his/her word as to the products..if i can afford them i buy them. But if you don't have faith in that person...you are going to just see it as a big "Sales" push. So maybe you should find a hair dresser that doesn't insult your inteligence and stick with that person..i think you enjoy the results more

RE: gray hairs...

I have had a lot of trouble finding a stylist. It seems like as soon as I get to like one, they disappear. Now I am in a new state and not looking forward to searching again.

I had never really colored my hair until a little over a year ago. I tried it, and discovered I hate maintaining roots, just miss having my natural color. I went into a salon with a new stylist, and asked for help in giving me a color that would be easy to grow out, easy to let me get back to my natural color. His response? "I think keeping color on your hair will cover up all those grays." I responded along the lines of not having anyone mention all my grays before. He said, "oh" and looked quite surprised.

!!! He was actually an interesting person, and the cut was good at the end, but I could not get past that comment. I'm 25... I have a few grays, but come on.

Me personally, I only like to 'sell' products to customers that have a potential need for the product. For instance, if I give a guy a Princeton cut, they tend to look really great with a nice gel, BUT, a lot of guys don't like that 'dipped in polyurethane' look, so I have a great product that is called whipped wax that is really flexible and pliable and is very popular, so I suggest it and use it in their hair to see if they like it, but never, ever pressure anyone. And, like Aphil, I always suggest a shampoo for color treated hair to someone that colors their hair. A lot of them have sunscreen to protect the color and make it last longer and the better products do have a better result with processed hair. Again, I suggest, but never pressure. I also like to have free samples for the customer to try out a product at home to see for themselves with no finanical issues at all.

But, if you have totally healthy hair with no problems to it, I don't balk at even Suave or White Rain as long as the conditioner to it is used with it. I mean, if the customer's hair is healthy, why change? In my opinion.

My all-time favorite shampoo and conditioner, I have to admit, though, is Paul Mitchell Super Skinny. I also love the Super Skinny Serum especially if I'm flat ironing my hair. I can get the shampoo conditioner liter combo from the beauty supply for $15 or somthing like that, though. It lasts two months. PrettyOne, if you have long, straight hair, I think you'd love this shampoo/conditioner. You should look for it in salons and see if they have any samples or very small bottles. Just a suggestion...no pressure.

my usual problem is that they don't listen to me when i say things like - my hair will only part in the middle - it refuses to do otherwise and to try is futile. i always leave with a side part. my hair will not hold a curl. i am NOT lying. i spent $70.00 on a perm that fried my hair and the curl fell out of it in like 3 weeks. I don't own a curling iron or a hair dryer and I never ever will. I want something simple and easy and I don't want to put product in my hair. Nobody listens... if I wanted to go somewhere get worked on and not be listened to - I'd just go to my doctor!

I have been going to the same hairdresser since I was about 5... she works with two other hairdressers in a very small salon in a small town. It's not a chain store, it's owned by one of the girls that works there.

I tried coloring my hair at home about 3-4 times when I was 18-19 years old. The last time I tried the kit with color/highlights and the highlights turned out platinum blonde (I have very dark brown hair). That was the last time I will ever color my hair at home. I immediately made an appt with my hairdresser and she was able to even the color out fantastically. I was even a redhead for about 3 months (see picture on my profile). I had her color my hair a couple more times, the final time trying to match my natural hair color because I was sick of the upkeep of colored hair. That final color ended up washing out after a couple of weeks and turned my dark hair a weird brassy color. I just decided to let it grow out completely naturally and after two years I think I only have an inch or so left of the brassyness. So, at my next trim it will be all gone. I don't blame my hairdresser for this, my hair just doesn't seem to ever color well because it is such a dark shade of brown.

I don't think I'll ever color my hair again. I like the style it is now, I've had it for two years. I'm thinking about changing it once I've lost all the weight, but I'm not sure.

The thing I really love about my salon is their prices are extremely low. I think it's $12 for a cut and $35 for a color or perm. This is one of the advantages of living in a very rural area, prices for these sorts of things tend to stay down. My hairdresser knows me very well and has always done a great job on my hair, so I don't think the price if reflective of the quality of service.

I also use V05 or Suave shampoo & conditioner. I don't buy my hair products because I live with my parents. I use the smoothing shampoo and conditioner when I straighten my hair (about once per week). I use Suave the rest of the time. But I don't shampoo every day. My hair is normally very coarse and curly and gets dried out from daily shampooing.