I got weighed at the doctor's office the other day as part of my new-patient physical. I really really really hate being weighed so I'd rescheduled the appointment twice. Before I could ask the medical assistant (who, by the way looked young enough to be in middle school) not to tell me my weight she blurted it out.

I weigh 122 pounds. The assistant and the doctor both think that's good.

I don't.

I've lost 18 pounds since the last time I was weighed (at another doctor's office). That was over a year ago. Apparently I'm not making very much progress. 122 is admittedly, a lower number than I expected, but a higher number than I had secretly been hoping for.

And now I'm within two pounds of “The Wall.”

The wall is 120 pounds. That is the weight that I have never ever been able to get below without resorting to unhealthy methods. A big reason I haven't wanted to be weighed is because I really didn't want to know how close I was to the weight my body just won't get below, unless to do something drastic.

I'm tempted to do something drastic now.

Admittedly my calories are a bit high. I average between 1750 and 2000 calories a day. I have a job that keeps me on my feet and moving all day, but obviously I'm not burning enough calories or I would have lost more weight.

I want to go down to 800. Heck, I want to go down to 500.

I know I lot of people are going to say I shouldn't go below 1200. Yeah, well, I'm just as hungry at 1200 as I am at 800 or below. So why not lower the calories enough to actually lose at a decent rate? (And by that I mean a couple of pounds a week.)

Maybe I should try fasting on the weekends to get my average down??

I'm only five one. I want to weigh 110 pounds (which would still put me at five pounds overweight by the old pre BMI method of allowing 100 pounds for five feet and then five pounds for each inch over. I think that is reasonable.


There are other posters about my height or slightly taller who weigh under 120. At least one of them is near my age. So I know it can been done.

But I don't think it can be done by me.

And that makes me furious

I knew that I would react just this way to finding out my weight. Which is precisely why I avoid the scale.

Sounds like you know yourself very well and that weighing yourself is a trigger for you, so why not avoid it? Unless you are actively being treated for an eating disorder, you can always reasonably decline to weigh in at the doctor office.
Other than the number, what are you unhappy about? Do you feel sluggish, tired, weighed down by that 12 pounds? Does it create physical issues with your health? The answers to these questions may help you understand your motivations and set a plan that is balanced for you.

Best of luck!

Hi there. I'm about your height. And age, I think, if I recall correctly. I'm 43.

Anyway, I'm sorry you were disappointed about your weigh-in. It's real unfortunate that you feel that way. 18 lbs down is phenomenal. 122lbs IS a healthy weight. I'm not sure what BMI chart you are looking at. Regardless, I think you need to explore why you feel the need to go so low and so quickly. Soulbliss had some good questions for you to ponder.

And just because some people, you mentioned a poster here, at your height/age CAN get lower then 122 lbs, that doesn't mean that it's right for YOU.

As far as dropping your calories so low, I'm not sure why you feel the need to go from 2000 to 800 or 500. Or fasting on the weekends. If I remember you're hungry at the 1700 level, how are you going to feel at the 800 level? Is it really worth it for you to make yourself miserable by being hungry?

I wish you all the best.

Hey marlu. I think we can all understand being angry because the scale won't do what we want. I'm really sorry that you feel stuck!

I'm not sure what to say because you are normal weight now. I realize that you would like to be lower, but you aren't someone who has a "weight problem" as we usually think of it here. It was really good that you dropped those 18 pounds, though!

You didn't ask for feedback--so I won't get into the question of healthy weight vs. unhealthy, the problem with less than 1200 cals, etc.

But, please do some soul-searching about why you want to weight 110 pounds. What does that number represent to you that makes you want to risk nutrition in order to reach it? Is this a sane goal, or something else? I'm not saying it is or it isn't--just something for you to think about. Only you know the answer.

Jay

Hi SoulBliss and RockinRobin.

Thank you for replying. Getting replies to posts really means a lot to me.

SoulBliss, getting weighed and actually knowing my weight IS definitely a trigger for me, which is why I've avoided the scale. I use measurements and clothing sizes to mark my progress instead.

Physically I feel fine at my current weight but mentally I feel the number is too high.

RockinRobin you are one of the people I admire and look up to. You probably hold the 3fc record for the fastest weight loss. But I think you keep your calories (I may be wrong here) at 1200 or less. I'm tempted to drop my calories to that level or below because I am ravenous at anything below 1700, and this is if I eat healthy food or unhealthy food so once I get under that level it doesn't seem to matter how low I go.

And I'm tempted to fast one weekend day (I don't move nearly as much on the weekends) in order to get my weekly average dow.

I'm not looking at any BMI chart. The five feet = 100 pounds + five pounds for each inch over method of calculating weight has been around for decades. It's a quick method of calculating weight that I've always liked better than the old insurance charts which say I should weigh about 95 pounds (yeah,right).

I don't like the BMI charts because they go by weight alone and don't take into account what that weight is composed of.

My frame is hard to figure out. I have large wrists and large elbow measurements (6 and 3 and a quarter inches respectively ) for my height. On the other hand I have a tiny (27 and a half inches) ribcage.

Right now I'm wearing mostly 4's and some 2's in misses, size 3 in juniors, a 28 waist in men's and a size 16 in kids.

Sheesh! I guess I'm small enough. But I want to be lighter.

I don't know why.

Darn doctors. If I didn't know my weight I might have actually started being happy about my size.

You say that there are other people your height and age are below 120 on this website. You need to remember that everyone's body is different, and some people's bodies may be meant to be under 120, some people's are not meant to be. If you are finding that it is going to be hard to get under 120 and the only way to do it is to do something drastic you need to think about the fact that your body may be happy and destined to be at 122 and you shouldn't do anything drastic or force yourself to extreme measures just to get somewhere your body isn't meant to go.

Also, eating only 800 or 500 calories a day and fasting on the weekends could make your body eventually go into the unhealthy starvation mode if it isn't getting the energy it needs and if you are exercising, you will be at a great deficit for getting the nutrition your body needs. I think if you have to go to such drastic measures of eating so little just to shed a few more pounds, it isn't worth it to your body because it needs proper nutrition to be happy. Think about what you will be doing to your body if you give it so few calories. You say you are eating 1750 to 2000 calories a day now - why not try going down to 1400 to 1500 instead and adding in exercise if you aren't doing that already?

I hope you are able to figure out how to continue your weight loss without taking such drastic measures if that is where your body is meant to go, and please try not to compare yourself to others - each and everyone's body is different and is meant for different shapes, weights, and states of being happy.

JayEll you must have posted when I replied before.

I know I'm at a healthy weight by the BMI charts. But I want to weigh less and I don't really think another 12 pounds is too much to ask for.

If only my body would cooperate.

why dont you reduce your calories by 200? so that you'd be at 1600 - 1800?

Marlu, first of all thank you for the compliments. I wasn't trying to break any records. I was just utterly determined to lose the weight once and for all. Therefore I was EXTREMELY consistient. I stuck to my calorie allotment, (eventually down to about 1200 calories) no matter what. But that's neither here nor there. Another thing I want to add, I am NOT hungry at 1200 calories. I'm just not. AND on top of that, 1700 calories cause me to GAIN weight at this point. How I wish I COULD maintain at 1700 calories. Oh how I wish that.

Okay, you're not looking at any BMI chart - good, cause they don't take individual people/circumstances into account. But HELLOOOOOO, neither does your "method". As far as your frame goes, big, small, medium - whatever - WHO CARES??????? It's unimportant. You're 122 lbs. ONE HUNDRED TWENTY TWO POUNDS. A size 4, some 2's, etc... You are WONDERFUL just where you are. You hear that? You're perfectly FINE.

If you've got a problem with the scale, then by all means - don't use it. Ignore it. Whatever works for you.

You keep saying that you're ravenous at anything less then 1700 calories. Well then there is your answer. DON'T mess with it. You DESERVE to feel full and satisfied and energized. PLease understand that. You are playing with fire for even thinking of going lower then that. You are able to maintain a weight of one twenty something at 1700 calories? And 1700 calories satisfies you. So STAY at that one twenty something. You must get past this. You just must. Speak to a professional if necessary. Journal, figure it out. I mean what's going to happen if you starve yourself and you DO get to 110? Then what???? Hmmm? You're miserable and crazed because you're absolutely ravenous. How long do you think you'll be able to STAY at the 110? A month, a year, forever? No - BECAUSE IT'S NOT REALISTIC FOR YOU!!!! I don't mean to shout, well, yes I do - it's just that I so badly want you to not feel this way. I so badly want you to be happy with yourself. And thrilled with your body and where it's at RIGHT THIS MINUTE.

I just don't know what else to say to you. If you need anything, feel free to PM me.

myxnie--good point! marlu, why not try that? Going down by that amount instead of doing something more drastic all of a sudden might actually get better results.

Jay

Well I've never heard of this 100 pounds for the first 5 feet then 5 for every inch after. That would mean I should be 120. That would make me look like Twiggy. I don't wanna look like Twiggy.

As for dropping your cals to 800 or less, you could even possibly sabotage yourself by doing that. You may put your body into starvation mode if you eat that few calories every day and you end up not losing another pound. And all that torture wouldn't be worth it if it's not going to work. It's much better on yourself, on your health, and on your body's ability to actually cope and lose, to eat a sensible diet within a healthy calorie range. Just dropping 300 or 400 cals a day could start you losing and you could end up passing that wall.

As far as the doctor's scale? You may already have PASSED the wall. I know I can weigh in at home, then by the time I've had liquids and possibly food, and been to the doctors, I weigh in 2 to 3 pounds more there. So if you weighed in at 122 there, you may have been 119 that morning. Find the silver lining.

Hi and thanks for the reply. The reason I want to cut the cals so low is that I am ravenous at anything below 1700 ( and that level is a struggle) and cutting them lower doesn't seem to make much difference in how I feel, so I might as well cut them low enough to actually lose the last 12 pounds.

But at what cost to your health? I just can't imagine that anyone can remain healthy at such a low calorie level. You just can't get enough nutrients. The scale might read what you want it to...but if you make yourself sick? It just seems more logical to avoid the scale. You weren't stressed about it until you saw the number on the scale.

Take care of yourself - we're all pulling for you to make it to a better place.

That doesn't make any sense, Marlu. If the pounds are going to come off, they'll come off at 1500 just as well as they'll come off at 800. It will just take longer. And I doubt that you would be the same degree of hungry eating 1500 or 1600 as eating 800. Certainly I'd try to make 1500 work before I launched into a starvation diet.

I think you need to give some serious thought as to why it's so important that you weigh 110lb, especially if you think you look fine now. There's no real reason to starve yourself for an abstraction--that's ED thinking, right there.

And Robin makes an excellent point about maintenance. If you have to starve yourself to get there, how are you going to manage to stay there? You need to find a weight that you can maintain on 1700 calories or more. Starving yourself to 110 and then quickly gaining it back when you start eating a normal number of calories doesn't really get you anywhere.

Because I'm as hungry at that level as I would be at 1200. And I probably wouldn't lose weight any faster.