I can't seem to get on track and stay there. I've payed a TON of money for weight loss programs and fitness videos. I've read a million books on dieting and non-dieting. I can't stick to anything for more than a day or so. I hate what I look like with a passion and am very down lately. I keep make poor eating choices and can't seem to find the will power to change it. I really wanted to lose weight before Summer so that I felt confident to get onto a swim suit and that didn't happen. My body and weight is a total obsession in my life and seems to be preventing me from doing alot of things in my life. I just want to live normally and lose this extra weight. I feel like I'm obsessed with food and it's on my mind all of the time. I've read alot of Geneen Roth books and would really like to find my perfect weight without dieting all of the time. I'm scared to stop though, what if my weight gets worse. Help. If you have had this happen and have overcame, how did you do it? This has been an obsession for the last 2 1/2 years and I feel as if I'm going to break soon. I have a son and I would like to be free from this life I'm living and be a good mom with a healthy self-esteem. Bring on any advice

I could have written the same email . I don't have the answer, I have dieted, lost weight and regained , and repeated the process. One day I just said this is enough and got going, This time I refuse to spend money for someone to tell me what to eat.I now count calories and check these forums out every day, Good luck, you can do it.

So, I understand what you both are feeling. I have had to sit down and think about what my triggers are that make me fall off the wagon. It's usually emotional and now I'm subbing walking the dogs, exercise, reading a book, scrapbooking, etc. for food comfort.

When I don't succumb, I feel stronger for the next time when those "feelings" rise. It takes some time to get in touch with yourself and deal with what is past and present, conscious or subconscious, but it's worth it do face it head on.

I still have some of those days and there are always going to be stressful situations in our lives, but in learning how to handle them better little by little and making the right choices (cuz no one is shoving that cookie down my throat, it's me... ) I'm doing the best I can for my body. I want to be around for my family. And I don't want any one or any thing controlling my life anymore. I know it's hard. I do. But ultimately, I'm responsible for me.

Just don't give up. Fall off, get right back on. Just keep getting back on!! We're human and it doesn't have to be all or nothing.

You can do this!! Believe in yourself!! You're worth it!!

JessP,

Bargoo's post describes how many members have finally managed to succeed--namely, finding out what works for you. That means experimenting, and also discarding what doesn't work.

Compared to many people, you don't have that much to lose. Still, now is the time to stop gaining! Otherwise, you could find yourself in a worse position later on, with even more to lose. So, you've made a start--and you can make it work.

It sounds to me like you are in a classic dilemma. The part of you that is reading the books and ordering the exercise videos isn't the part who is in charge when you feel like eating something. Therefore, no matter how much you learn about healthy eating, you end up not following through.

It might help for you to take things slowly. This is just a suggestion, as is anything you read here. Pick out one thing you can change right now. It may be--drinking one less soda, or only drinking diet soda. Or, only eating vegetable snacks after dinner in the evening--if that seems too hard, only eating one serving of light popcorn in the evening--instead of grazing on whatever is at hand. Or, you might choose to eat a healthy breakfast each day. The point is, choose ONE thing to change, and then do only that. Do it for a week or more.

Then, choose something else. Maybe it will be--take a short walk every day, or every other day. Or, get rid of the corn chips or ice cream, if those are 'trigger' foods for you. Just another one thing. Add that to the first thing.

This way, you only have to cope with one thing at a time, and you can allow everything else to just happen, without obsessing or getting down on yourself.

Worth a try?

Good luck!
Jay

Thanks to everyone for all of your posts. I'm going to try and take it moment by moment. I always want the weight off yesterday. It's going to take time and patience. I just really want it to work and lose the weight once and for all. Wish me Luck

Have a look at Featherweights and read my *Detox, of A Different Kind* thread, because I am in a very similar situation to you. I am not overweight, but I have a lot of MENTAL weight ie food/body obsession to shed, and I'm just trying the...well, you can read it, its long ;-)

it may help..I can see where youre coming from anyway

emily
xxx

When you say you have a hard time sticking to "anything" for more than a day or two, that's a big red flag that your plan or program is far too strict, or far too removed from your normal life. Any type of change is very difficult, and completely "turning over a new leaf," so to speak is often impossible. You can't expect to become a whole new person overnight.

After all, you're probably not trying to make one or two easy changes, but dozens of drastic changes, and if you see anything less than complete and total success as a total failure, you're definitely more apt to give up after only a couple days.

Think about trying one small change. It may sound silly, but make yourself a little sticker chart and give yourself a sticker everytime you meet that goal. Instead of focusing on failures, focus on your successes, and feel proud of improvements no matter how small. After a few days or a week, or whenever you feel ready, add another goal to your sticker chart...

It's sometimes hard to consider making only small changes, because our gut reaction is that it will take too long this way, but often it is actually more rewarding and spurs greater success because it reduces the amount of discouragement and false starts that result when you try to take on too much too quickly.