Hello everyone! I am new. Today after getting on the scale - and it being the highest since pregnancy (and this is after losing 80 lbs since pregnancy 4 years ago, and now regaining 35 THIS YEAR) I know it is time to buckle down. Stop talking about it - dreaming about it - and just do it. But I am nervous. Scared is more like it. I know I have lots of things to change and it isn't just about food - it is how I use food. I can't believe I have gained this much weight back - I am so out of control and I just want it BACK. The weird thing is, I've done it before - never gotten there totally, but I was down to 240. And here I am again - not even a year later - 35 lbs heavier. And I am disgusted with myself and sad - and scared. Wow - a lot for a first post. But here I am. Any advice would be appreciated!

"stop talking about it - dreaming about it - and just do it"

RIGHT ON, GIRL!

Those were my exact thoughts too. I've been dreaming and talking about losing weight for years. I'm FINALLY doing it rather than just dwelling on my fat and wishing it wasn't there. If wishes were changes, ya know?

I was scared too. Very nervous by nature. And I feared that I actually couldn't lose weight, physically (dunno why I got that idea in my head)
I have been out of control as well and am giving myself time to relearn how to eat and listen to my body. I abused it for a while. I love food and eating but I also use it for comfort when I'm sad and angry...heck, when I'm happy too! I also had a binging problem. But I'm not even thinking about that now. I'm focused on the NEW me which is slowly, but surely, coming to light.
I too gain weight VERY easily, quickly. Yet it takes a lot for me to lose.

I started WW recently and lost my first few lbs in many years. Me - someone who only fantasized about weight loss, someone who was certain I cldn't physically lose any weight, someone who felt totally out of control for so long, felt totally addicted to food and eating. Well. If I can gain strength and determination, you can. And I know I have a long way to go but I'm not going to focus on that, rather, on the day to day victories. You're here! That's a good start. Are you going to follow any certain plan or diet?

Hi and welcome to the site,
This is a great place to find help and info. I still have my pregnancy weight 17 yrs later, and hopefully this will be the time I loose it. Good luck on your weight loss,
cheryl

I could have written (almost verbatim!) your post. Our current weight is the same even. I lost 50 pounds on WW before I got pregnant w/my baby who is 7 months now. After she was born, I was right around 240. Since then (in just 7 months!) I have gained 36 pounds. I've been totally out of control. Every day I would think constantly about what I should do about my weight...should I give up and just try to be happy at this weight? Then I obsessed on the many different ways there are to lose weight...I got so overwhelmed, I would calm myself by...you guessed it! eating more. This past weekend, I just decided I had to focus and really do something...not just think about doing something. It hasn't been easy, but I swear I already feel more healthy. This morning I woke up wanting to eat a bag full of cookies, but I got on here instead and read some of the wonderfully inspirational messages on this board and ate a healthy breakfast instead.

I guess I'm just trying to say, I know what you're going through!! If you'd like to, we can do this together.

Good luck, I will look forward to hearing about your journey.

You've taken some important first steps and you should count those as victories! Good for you!
Your post has some similarities to my story. I remember when I had gotten down to 240. I actually had muscle definition in my legs, was out of plus sizes and just felt great. Felt so great that I let it go and got up to 281. I don't know how I got stupid and let that happen, but I did. It's done and over, though, and I just have to keep at it. That's what I'm doing now. Baby steps!
My best suggestion is to keep reading here and post often. It has helped me through a couple of rough spots in the journey!!

Nice to meet you! You have the right mindset... JUST DO IT! It is possible. Just look at all of the sucesses right here on this site. Take it day by day and soon enough you will be there.

Hi and welcome to a great, supportive and motivating place!!!! That in it self is a step in the right direction.

As far as advice, don't be nervous, don't be scared - be EXCITED. You are about to embark on a journey to get you towards a better, healthier and happier YOU. I mean it really IS exciting. You stick with your plan and before you know you'll get a grip on your out of control eating, you will feel tons better, okay and look it too and be closer to your goals. But hang on, you're in for the ride of your life!!!! Hard at times, but so very amazing and rewarding. Good luck.

Hello again everyone! First off - thank you SO much for your replies. I really can't tell you how much it means to me!

dippidy and slashnl - I don't know why I am surprised to hear that others have the same story as me, but I am! I am now a little more excited about this - going through it together and seeing our progress, along as everyone else's! (it feels so good not to be alone!!!)

My biggest problem is that I KNOW how to lose weight. I've been overweight my entire life - or at least I felt I was. I knew what I needed to do to keep that weight off - and I didn't do it. Noone put that food in my mouth. I feel like such a failure for gaining the weight back - after keeping it off my 3 years (my youngest son is 4!). The biggest change was during that time I was seeing a nutrionist and she was more like a counselor - and I was really losing the weight for her. This fall she left to take a new job AND my second sister (I have 2) had gasto bypass surgery. So I was once the thinnest in my family, and now both my sisters have had gastro and I am BY FAR the heaviest. And I felt abandoned, I guess. I have discovered that it isn't just about my weight.... A few months ago I prayed to God to help me, and seriously - the next day I picked up the Oprah magazine that talked about this site. I found the site and discovered that I have Compulsive Overeating Disorder. I went to my doctor, got put on antidepressants and am now in counseling. (but I've gained weight since that!) I know I should go check out those threads too - but I just haven't yet. I'm revisiting a lot of things from my childhood, and it's painful - and I've turned to food, which is a mistake. I also am so lucky that I have an incredibly - INCREDIBLY supportive husband (13 years yesterday!) as well as friends. The support is there - my own self is my downfall. And maybe like others - I don't like healthy food or exercise. But I am hoping that slowly my tastebuds will change. And my husband just got me an IPOD for Mother's Day - great for walking - and a DDR (Dance Dance Revolution) for our anniversary. The DDR is fun and hardly feels like exercise, but it must be doing something because this morning when I woke up I was SORE.

Well, that was longer than I intended - my apologies. Perhaps I should have started a new thread? I have never posted or joined any kind of group - anywhere - before.

Also, Amberoo - you asked about my plan. When I was seeing a nutrionist and was successful I would track my calories on my palm pilot. That worked out the best. But this time I know that it is about more than food. I picked up the Bob Greene book (Best Life) and it was like it spoke to me - he really had my number. If I don't get the other stuff under control, my weight won't ever be either. So today was the day I got on the scale like Bob said - this is it - this is the HEAVIEST I will ever be again. So I'm going to start with that and then eventually track my calories.

Thanks again - I AM getting excited!!!

Scrappychic, you are already ahead of the game. Weight loss for many people (not everyone is the same though) is about first really, truly realizing the impact our weight has on ourselves--physically, mentally, emotionally. It's a bit like AA, you know? Acknowledging there is a problem.

I fought that first bit for YEARS! I mean, of course logically I knew that I was heavy, that my mass was bad for my bones, but I avoided thinking about how it was affecting me mentally.

Then, just this past April, I went to visit my brother (no weight problem, not since he was in HS, 10 year ago) in Amsterdam. You walk way more there than you do in your standard US town or city, the main mode of transportation is biking, and you eat better. There are fewer processed foods in general, and fast food is really hard to find. And I lived the life there for that week. I was moving a TON every day. I was eating until I was full, and eating fresher foods while I was at it. And I stayed in a hostel, which meant NO privacy to have any kind of binge.

Another thing: I noticed how Americans, Germans, Canadians, and some Brits stuck out in Amsterdam--not because of their westernized clothing or accents, but because of our WEIGHT. You can spot an American in Amsterdam a mile away. We're FAT. Not just overweight, but FAT. And we're red in the face from moving more than we're used to. And we're out of breath from walking a few blocks to the tram stop.

And I was DISGUSTED that this was me! I finally saw myself as one of those out of shape, unhealthy Americans, and I did NOT want that. And so when I got home, I promised myself I'd be healthier.

The thing is, of course, my daily life isn't all that active. I work behind a desk. I drive over an hour each way to / from work. BUT, I've committed myself to exercising consistently 3 days minimum a week.

I found out that I needed small changes. I have eaten a lot more whole, less-processed foods in general for a couple of years, but I've eaten a lot of them. So for now, it's doing my exercising and just tracking what I'm eating to see what I need to change. For me, it's easier to track when I make up a menu for the week; for others, logging as they go works.

BUT, and I finally pulled my head out of the sand long enough to understand this, I personally absolutely must write that food down. Relying on my memory isn't an option, because I'm really good at tricking my brain.

So moral of the story: start small, start consistently, and the rest will come.

So, a big welcome to you, and congrats on lucky 13 years of marriage!!!

Lynn

PS--this turned out to be really long!

Oh, good! You're getting excited! You should be because it is such an amazing thing to take back the control. And as you read and post here more and more, you will see that you are sooooo not alone! Don't worry about long posts, you'll see those all over the forum, too. When you are passionate or frustrated or excited about something, you talk about it and that is the healthiest way to be.

You are very close to my weight and I know it seems like such a big mountain to climb. But you'll see from many others here that it is possible to lose this weight, even the monster amounts that we are facing!! I feel like it is easiest to take it day by day. I have goals... kind of... but nothing that will put added pressure on me. I get enough of that with my job and my extremely active kids and family. I took baby steps at the beginning and have slowly increased to new levels. I started by cutting out sodas and watching how much I ate. Nothing specific, just trying to be more aware. At the same time, I started walking. I was in horrible shape and couldn't go very far or fast. I think I only did about 15 minutes worth at first. I took it as a victory that I was moving at all! I let that be the standard for a couple of weeks and then I added more speed and time to my walk. I still haven't gotten to the point of writing down everything I eat and recording calories (I just haven't made it a priority yet). But my walking is up, I'm adding strength exercising, and I drink a lot of water. Seems to be working!

Now some people were able to drastically move into their exercising and calorie counting programs. I am just not geared that way! The important thing is to find what works for you and keep with it! As you can see, you have the support!!!!

I am getting excited! Thanks again for your posts. Lynn23c, your post about Amsterdam was SO interesting. I noticed when I went to San Fran this spring how much walking I needed to do (that I wasn't used to!) and thank GOODNESS for public transportation! A goal now is to get in shape for this summer's family vacation, which I'm sure will require a lot of walking.

slashnl, you were talking about our high mountains to climb. I have put my goal as 240 (I SO hate even typing in my weight!) - of course in a perfect, easy world I'd like to be 110 but for now I just want to be back where I was - and being happy with that and in control. Once I get there I can keep going. But I am most hardest on myself for gaining weight from that 240 (my lowest since pregnancy 4 years ago - and honestly, my lowest in who knows how long). I like at your weight loss and I think - I just need to get THERE - just a little bit of a loss and that gets me inspired! So, I am thankful for this forum for inspiration!!!

By the way, you mentioned that you cut out diet soda - and I've read elsewhere on here about that too, but I was curious about it. I have drastically cut back in the past few weeks, but still have about 1 per day. Sometimes I just crave that diet coke carbonation! What is the deal with diet pop?

THANKS!

Scrappy, you're gorgeous!!!!!! WoW.

I was never a big soda drinker - diet or otherwise, so I don't have much info to give you in that regard. Every now and then I will have a diet cola. So yeah, the only point to this post was to tell you that that avatar picture of yourself is simply stunning. That's all - for now.

Well, to be perfectly honest, I gave up NON diet soda! I can't believe I admitted to that! I used to drink two to three 32 oz Pepsi's at work during the week and then more at home on the weekend. Gasp! I've never liked diet soda. Something in it makes me feel dizzy/fuzzy. But, I've been reading a lot here and many people feel that diet pop can actually make you crave sweets. That's the extent of my knowledge!

Welcome scrappy. Gosh - I can do you all you guys better on the baby weight. My "baby" will be 38 yrs old next month & I still have HIS baby weight (plus more).

Thanks ladies! Robin - I just checked out your before and after pictures - OH MY GOODNESS! WOW! Those are amazing and so inspiring - could that really be me just one year from now? So back at you about the gorgeous! By the way, I am loving this place. I was SO craving something sweet (chocolates, sugar, etc are my downfall) and instead I got myself a diet tea and came on here and now it's GONE. I'm good for the moment - WOW, what a feeling - I'm happy and EXCITED. Just like you said!

HAVE AN AWESOME DAY!