No my friends, i am not hungry for food. i am hungry for my mom, my best friend and my family. I am hungry for affection, for feeling secure. I am hungry for someone to share my happy days and my sad ones with. I am hungry for my country. I am hungry for the presence of God in my life. I am on the other hand not hungry for food.
When i binge, i get 30 minutes of forgetfulness, of happiness and stability, i sometimes need those 30 minutes a week just to keep me from going insane. I keep hearing voices in my head telling me to eat and after fighting them all week long, i gave in! i couldn't push them away any longer. I am mentally and physically tired.
After i binge i feel tired and miserable and just break into uncontrollable sobs.
I know that until i fill this void in my heart and my life, i won't be able to stop binge eating. I pray for those who feel the same as i do, who are a part of this vicious cycle.
Dear friends, i urge each and every one of you to dig in deep, and evaluate the things u have and the things u miss in ur lives. I would also like you to be thankful and appreciate whatever brings you joy and happiness and helps u in your journey and make sure to treasure those things and never let go of them.
(i sure hope u don't mind me calling u "friends" for so far u r the only people who know about my struggle and u r the only persons whom i can relate to)
Thank you for reading/listening

Just want to offer you some Big and I hope things get better for ya!

You are brave for sharing this with us. I know what it's like to feel lost and lonely. I hope you are able to find something to fill the void in a healthy manner.

I so totally understand what you're saying, and where you're coming from. I feel the same way sometimes. Well, a lot of the times. My parents got divorced about a year ago, and I really haven't seen much of them since, since they've both moved on. My MIL moved 16 hours away. And now that my little guy is in kindergarten, I've lost my SAHM friends....
If you need to talk, feel free to send me a line. We look like our goals are about the same, too!

GOOD LUCK! *hugs*

Thank you guys for ur understanding

Wow, Doudoug - it sounds like you've had a real epipany. I hope that realizing where this food-behaviour is coming from helps you to get it under control. I think a lot of people binge, and never can really figure out why, so how do you stop doing something when you don't understand why you do it in the first place?

Good luck!

Hey Janie,
to identify the root cause of my illness is one thing and treating it is another. I have been trying so hard to fight the urges but no matter what i keep failing to stop the binge. this week has been terrible. On saturday, i will be meeting for the first time with a specialist in eating disorders, hope she would help me in controlling the binge, restrict cycle (tho i haven't been restricting lately). What saddens me the most is that after i binge, i feel miserable and i keep telling myself that every time yet i end up overeating! It sucks that my body doesn't do what my brain tells it to. I feel so out of control and i hate that! I feel like a total failure because i never keep my promise to stop overeating.
Thanks for ur input.
God bless