Dear fellow chicks,

does anyone just feel like thier entire life is not the way they want it?

It's not only that i'm overwieght, and not as happy as i'd like to be. I'm wanting to change to a job i enjoy more, but i'm afraid of the pay cut that i would probably have to take. It's good not to worry so much about being able to pay the bills. But on the other hand, how much more of my life am i going to spend doing something that is 'ok' at best, working somewhere that i feel like i'm just not thriving at?

Adding to the problem is that going on 3 years, i have not been able to get along with my boss. Ive tried talking to him. I always thought talking it out was the best way to go, but with him i just feel like i'm digging a hole.

So i come home feeling down trodden, and can't get up the urge to engage in any hobbies or activities.

I know i'm different than alot of you in that i don't have a husband or boyfriend or kids. Part of me is worried that if I do find someone, my depression will put him off. So i don't know if i'm really content to be alone or if i just convince myself of it.

I dont' want just to whine, I'm looking into other jobs. I'm trying to change.
should I try talkiing to my boss again? things have gotten so bad that i rarely speak to him if i don't have to, for fear of saying the wrong thing.
the odd thing is that before he was promoted, we were pretty good friends.

sigh, thanks for letting me vent.

bye,
kk.

oh yes, I have felt all of the above at one time or another. I would not talk to the boss again but I would get my resume updated and start actively looking for something better.Congratulations on your weight loss , getting your weight under control will make you feel so much better.

Take one step at a time, you have made a move on your weight, now work on your career move. All a part to making a happy you. Do what ever it takes to achieve this.

I have definitely felt like you do. For me, I fear never being fulfilled. Growing up, I never imagined being so unhappy. Part of it is depression of course, that hangs around in the good and the bad times. But I've never reached the career/pay success I just knew I would have. It's embarassing. I feel like a failure, but I don't know what to do about it.

I don't know what career to pursue next or what I'm interested in. (The depression makes me uninterested in anything.) I want the work to be enjoyable and meaningful, yet I NEED a decent salary to be happy. I don't mean to discourage you from taking a pay cut to get a better job, it's just a goal for me that hasn't been realized.

Fat is the other big issue. I have a hard time putting myself out there feeling so badly about myself.

I applaud your efforts KK! I think you are on the right track looking for another job and losing weight. It's alot to do at once, but we are here for you. Keep us posted.

Wow, I really feel for you. Being in a an unpleasant work situation is almost guaranteed to keep you depressed.

My advice (take it for what it's worth and make your own decision) would be to not try again to talk it out with the boss. Evidently he isn't particularly interested in changing the relationship. I would, if I were you, actively look for a new job. Idealistically, happiness is more important than money, but we all need to eat. Perhaps a <small> paycut might really be OK if you are happier in a different job.

Hugs to you in the meantime, and hang in there!

thanks guys,

I know i need to move on to a different job, i have never really been passionate about the job i have, it was just meant to be a springboard and to gain experience. i just never expected i would make as much as i do.

I know I would be happy making less, it's not about the money. As long as I can pay the bills and have a little left over for leisure, I would be happy. I seem to be one of those people who the more i have, the more i want.
Yet at the same time I think its liberating not to need things.... I feel it would be better if I had never known this salary, but maybe that's part of the lesson---having to choose...

I know what you mean about the Fat, hope 4 me. I just blew an interview, and i know it's partly cuz my confidence wasn't there. i think i looked nice and all, but you can't really undo what's been building there for years just in the time it takes to get ready for one interview. My self confidence is at zero.
On top of that i'm dealing with my hair being alot thinner than it used to, so I feel like i'm looking all weather beaten by life. But i have mmore controll over my wieght than my hair,so if i can just get my wieght healthier, i think i could feel better about my looks. I can always get a wig, they make nice ones these days i've been told.

and i don't want to really tell you that you don't HAVE to make a decent salary for happiness, if that has been one of your life goals. it isn't for me, but im not you of course. But I'm sure it's do-able, it would be easier if you knew what you were interested in doing...someone suggested to me to try an employment agencey, a job matching thing. I gave them a call today, but they were out, so I'll have to wait till tommorrow.

well, thanks for the encouragement.

I didn't overeat today by the way, yea!

Since your boss used to be your friend, you sould try talking to him. But if it doesn't work for the last time, you can let it go. After all, you're still his friend even though he doesn't talk to you, right? In regard to your job, you should find a new one. If your spirit is low because of your job, you'll never be happy with it. Find a job that's like not a job to you.


_________________
ben
2007 Lexus GX DVD Navigation System and Bluetooth by Lexus U.S.A.

Have you considered going to a doctor and talking about depression?