It's true...I am done!
I am done living by my past habits and attitudes. Last night at Weight Watchers we started talking and it really became apparent to me that of the 5 people in attendance, we all are so battered and bruised by past weight loss failures.
I lost 2 1/2 pounds at weigh in and I was the only one that lost last night. Needless to say, I did not disclose my loss because everyone was so bummed out.
One lady is getting married in June and she has been gaining weight--not losing. She got blood work back and found out that she had an extreme B12 deficiency and extremely elevated cortisol. Her Mom actually said to her, "You need to postpone your wedding, because you don't want to get married looking like you do..." She was so angry and hurt and I really can't blame her at all. How mean and evil!
We all shared our stories of childhood issues with Mom's, friends, and ourselves. Our leader asked us if we believed that we could reach goal and I raised my hand, but the majority did not. One lady, our University Librarian, said that that was the one thing in her life that she didn't have control over and she was so ashamed by it. She just didn't know how to overcome the weakness.
I felt so sad and discouraged, but then I said that that was absolutely unacceptable to me. When I was diagnosed in October with insulin resistence and given medication that was the key that unlocked my door. Call it the placebo effect or whatever you want to, but since that day in October I have been losing weight and I haven't looked back. That has been 7 months now...I have never stuck to anything this long.
I also quit drinking and I am going to quit smoking too. I told the girls last night that I wasn't doing all this merely to look great--I am doing it live!
So That's It! I am Done Forever!!!
Done failing and done convincing myself that I will fail.


Brava! What an up-lifting post! Thanks!!
which I've NEVER had except during pregnancy, I thought, ok this is what I needed to kick my butt into getting on track.. I got angry for giving up on myself before, and am now using that anger to drop this weight..

to the Beach!