Not only have I struggled with weight forever, but also depression. It's a vicious cycle. I get depressed - I eat more - I gain weight - I get depressed Food is my security blanket. I know it's wrong, but I can't break it.
I am so far down in a depression now that I cannot get motivated to do anything about it. I am lonely and separated (just my miles not choice) from my husband. I am hoping to get a kick in the pants or maybe just a ear to listen.
I know how to lose weight. I want to lose weight. Maybe I don't want it bad enough
I hope someone out there understands and can put up with this whining!

Get to the doctor, girl. Get meds if you need it. But stop what you're doing unless you want to lead a funeral procession.

to 3FC's

Hi girlie... first I'd like to say I'm glad your here It doesn't sound like you need a kick in the pants, it sounds like you need to talk to your doctor about whats going on. I know its a difficult thing to do but once you do, your gonna feel so much better. This could make a huge difference in your life. Be honest with your doc, after all they are here to help us, not judge us.

Hey there, I have to say I am TOTALLY understand where your coming from I have been going through the same thing all my life. I LOVE food, something really good to eat always makes me feel better! It's funny how that we know how to loose the weight but we just don't put the effort into. I really believe that you really need to want to change your life in order to lose weight. I am sooo tired of looking and feeling the way I do. I haven't lost any weight yet but I think that I may finally be in the right mind set.

Please feel free to contact me for anything, I have no problem with whinning ( I have a 2&3year old) I would like to help ya with anything.

You have been given good advice, I just wanted to add a little bit.

It's a real hard thing to stop that vicous cycle of depression - eat - depression - eat. Hard, but not impossible.

You say you love food. The key is to love yourself more. And also to love what doing without the food will do for you. Instead of looking at what you will be giving up, the high quantity of high calorie foods - try to look at it as what you will be GAINING. A happy more productive life. A fit and healthy you. A more active you. A chance to have the very best life that you can possibly have. The rewards are so much more to love then the food itself. The good thing about it is you don't have to get all the way to goal to start reaping the benefits of a new lifestyle. The victories start piling up before you know it. I have seen such improvement in every aspect of my life and I have for quite some time already and I am no where near goal.

It's also important to look for substitutes for food when you are feeling down. Journaling is a great idea. I never had a journal until I started this venture. I wrote in it all the hopes, dreams and goals I want to obtain by losing the weight. Knitting, sewing, reading, hot baths and so on.

The first few weeks are difficult, no doubt, but when you get past them all the good stuff starts falling into place. You will feel better, look better, the cravings will practically cease, you'll see a drop in the scale. All these things will propell you to keep on going. And before you know it, you will be out of that evil cycle and into a good one. Good luck to you.

Im the same, thats why ive joined here, need to do summat bout it b4 it takes over my life, i think just signing up to this board is a big enough step in its self, hope you get it sorted soon

I'm with you 100% with the depression & eating cycle. The only thing that gets me through a bad day at work is knowing that I can get something good to eat when its over. Food is my only comfort in life. I know this is very sad, but its true, its always been that way since I've been a kid. I can think of a bagillion other things I can do after a bad day...yoga, kickboxing, hot bath, writing in my journal, but its the instant gratification thing that gets me. If you or anyone else who can relate to this ever needs to vent, share worst ever stories or just needs to chat, please feel free to message me.

Thanks to all who have replied. I know I am not alone, but it is good to hear it. I have been on meds before and they work for a while but then don't. I get tired of finding new meds. I know that is stupid, but I also know there is only so much meds can do. I need behavioral changes and that is up to no one but ME. Rockinrobin really hit home. I do need to love myself more than food. Food will always be there, but I may not be at this rate with my family history. I look at my mom and say "no, not me" but I am on the same path!

We can do this together, right?

I am new at this as well. But I have struggled with depression too. I went on medication and it made me feel 'weird'. And like I wasn't present with the world...if THAT makes any sense. But I found out that the best medicine is taking care of myself and not beating myself up anymore. I was sort of mad at my DR for not suggesting this in the FIRST place. But since then I must admit I fell off the wagon went back to my old ways and now here I am. But I must tell you that as soon as you hit that rock bottom and decide that you want to be healthy ~ you will get into a new cycle of feeling good about feeding yourself healthy food and moving if just a little. And pretty soon you will feel like getting up in the morning to get on here and talk to some 'friends' and checking your scale and watching it move down! You will have more energy and by happier! It's true! Try this first and if it doesn't work then see your Dr. Or still see your Dr. but tell him what you are going to do about it. I would (and I did) find a program that suits your lifestyle. And get on it. Then come here daily for support! And keep a journal. And set very small goals for yourself. It's going to be so much fun! You just wait and see! But if it makes you feel any better I wanted to stay in bed every day all day ~ couldn't deal with certain issues facing me. My issues are still THERE but my focus has switch to myself...finally! How many woman put themselves LAST. I did. Now ~ although i've only lost 3.5 pounds...I went and had my hair done. A started tanning. I started putting my makeup on and fixing my hair. And dressing enough to look nice when I go out. Before I didn't care what people thought of me....I didn't care what I thought of me...but now...I'm thinking differently.

Hope this helps some.
Hugs to you!
Tina

I hear you there. Eating has made me happy since I was a little girl. My parents often rewarded me or apologized to me with food. So, when I felt down, I would just go for something sweet and I eat and eat until I felt sick (which certainly doesn't make me feel better!). Likewise, if I felt good, I would reward myself with food too!

When I know I'm getting stressed I try to occupy myself with something that requires my complete attention. I second the journaling comment above. My therapist has had me doing that for a while now and it helps SO much. I also keep healthier snacks like around for when I "slip" and have a "snack attack". A little reminder in the kitchen seems to help too. If I realize what I'm doing, it's easier to stop.

Sorry I'm not the best at advise, but if you ever need a hug from someone in the same boat, drop me a line.

Eating is fine just eat the right foods. Sub the cake for carrots and celery.

Eat lofat cheese and not full fat cheese.

Get creative. I love to eat and I did have a spell from 2005 to 2007 where I jumped off the SBD wagon and stress ate alot. I went from 160 to 198 lbs in 2 years!!!~
I am new here too, 1 week committed to being a loser...
But now I am eating less portions better food like fish veggies and chicken, and moving more.
Moving is important, start small and work up to more motion.
And buy some decent shoes, all the weight needs support, as I have found out~~~I had knee and hip pain and some was from the crappy shoes I had worn every day for 1.5 years!!! I just bought some nikes and they are awesome~!~~

Can I relate to this! I have tried lots of things to do instead of eat, but honestly, it is the only thing that really makes me feel happy. Even antidepressants haven't stopped that. But what really made me want to stop overeating and lose this weight is the shame I feel when my husband has to go sleep on the couch because of my snoring.
I think what's really going to be different this time is finding out about this Website. Thank you Oprah!

I am TOTALLY an emotional eater. My biggest weight gain wasn't with my triplet pregnancy. It was the road leading to that pregnancy. 5 years of infertility and pregnancy loss left me looking for anything and everything to numb the pain. Food did that for me (oh, and working tooooooo much). then I gained a ton with the pregnancy. I lost 60 lbs right away within 6 weeks of delivery and thought I was going to get back on track easily. Nope. Here I am about as heavy as I was right before giving birth. And yet my triplets are now 2 and now expect Mommy to be able to play with them. The guilt I feel from not being able to be the physically engaged Mommy I want to be has driven me once again to emotional eating.

Last Monday, for no dramatic reason, I decided this was it. I'm changing my life. I started going to the gym. I stopped eating just because I was upset/stressed/anxious/etc. I have already lost 5 lbs and feel like I can do this. I can stop letting the food control me. I can find healthier ways to deal with the tough times in my life. I have to. I prayed for these babies for far too long to let my bad health choices cost me any time with them.

This is hard work. I am now on Wellbutrin, so that helps with the depression. And I am infinitely grateful for finding this support forum, because I can't do it alone (and my DH is still in denial about his own food/stress issues).

Hang in there. Big hugs to you.
Monica

To NewFannie07: So how are you doing as of today? I read your first post and am wondering how you are doing? I am in your boat as well.

I am doing about the same. Just cannot let go of the comfort foods. Although, I don't seem to be eating as often. So, maybe I'm getting some control. Probably just fooling myself. It is a big war, but I can win one little battle at a time. Just yesterday drank a ton of water instead of gulping down soda. Small victory, but just kept telling that voice to shut up. I didn't "need" the soda and chips. I was just bored. Now if I could just do the same for all of the bad dinner foods I eat (lots of cheese and starch). I will get there. I also did do a few arm exercises yesterday. Woo-hoo! Thanks for asking how I am doing. It's nice to know there are others out there who have the same problems. You "know" this, but to actually hear from people is another thing altogether.