Wanderlust......I so totally understand!!!! I hate those kind of events....I skipped my 25th class reunion this week, because I feel like loser going alone...although I know others go alone...I just feel self conscience enough at my weight that I don't need to add to it.

On the otherside of things.....it has been a good day being single....laid around the house watching crappy TV until noon, went out and washed and detailed my car, took a short nap, went for a 3 mile walk, showered and ate.....now more junk TV.....sometimes it doesn't get better than this!!! LOLOLOLOLOLOL
Lilybutt

Hi all - just checking in - trying to get better about posting instead of popping in reading what's going on with everyone and popping back out.

Had a pretty uneventful day - just the way I like them. Went to the YMCA first thing and got the exercise out of the way. I've been kind of slacking in that area, especially the weight training, so I decided I better get serious again. I'm going to try to make it 5 times this week - we'll see. Then I came home and did 3 hours of "rock mining". The previous owner of my house put landscape rock EVERYWHERE. The only problem is that I have alot of pine trees that drop needles on top of the rock, the needles eventually turn to compost then weeds grow in the compost. Very, very ugly. So I have been sitting down and picking rock out of compost by hand. I have someone that wants the rock, I just have to gather it up. Very slow going, but not as bad as it sounds. It's very mindless and gives me time to just sit outside by myself and solve all the world's problems.

Happy Anniversary SheriaVa! It is so true what you said about balancing the inside with the outside. I still have problems shopping for clothes, because I have a hard time believing I am still not a size 34. It takes forever because I have to try on 4 sizes before I hit on the 22-24s. Why I don't just go for that size first is beyond me. Maybe I just don't want to be disappointed if they don't fit? Maybe because I am so used to wearing loose clothes to try to hide the fat? (Who do we think we're fooling by wearing big clothes?). I see big women wearing fitted clothes and sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't, but I still applaud them for having the courage and the body confidence to even try. I hope I get there some day.

Anyway, time to sign off and get to bed. Afterall, it is a "school" night!

Thanks for the anniversary wishes, Janet. I wore everything big too when I was larger. It has been an adjustment for me to learn to wear clothes that are actually the size I AM. What motivates me is that, every time I do wear more fitted clothing (can't stand wearing tight clothes, I'm talking clothes appropriate to my size), I get lots of compliments. It was a LONG time after I lost weight that people started to notice. In part because I was still wearing the old size clothes for a good while and, in part, because I was having such a hard time getting used to the idea of not continuing to buy new clothes that were too big. Also, I wear suit jackets to work most days and that covered up a lot. When summer came last year, people were like "WHOA! You've lost weight!" LOL and I would laugh inside because I'd lost weight well before that and no one noticed. Better noticed late than never!

As for big women wearing VERY fitted (skin-tight) clothing, that isn't something I find appealing. There are a few women in my office who do it and it bugs me, truth be told. They dress VERY well and, in fact, wear very nice clothing, but I have a hard time getting past the fact that EVERYTHING is hanging/bulging out to appreciate the style. These are very put-together women in terms of hair, makeup, matching shoes, etc...but all I see is sausage casing. Now do I admire them for having the positive self-image to wear that stuff? Sure. I can appreciate and envy that kind of self-confidence while not actually appreciating the look itself.

Last year, I bought a top at TJ Maxx that I would normally NEVER buy. It isn't tight, but fitted, and but it is made of a drapey fabric that hugs my breasts with a V-neck...very sexy. I've only worn it outside the house once in a year (and that was with a shirt over it because I was still (*I* felt) too big in the midriff to look good in it). I bought it because, when I was in the dressing room trying it on, and I turned around to look at myself in the mirror, I gasped. I was sexy. I was thin(ner). It made me feel like a million bucks, that top. So I said to myself "If this is under $20, I'm buying it...just because it makes me feel so darn good!" And I closed my eyes and then felt for the price tag under my left armpit...and it was around $15 so I got it.

One day, I will wear it to a party or something with a pair of black pants or a skirt and I will be in my glory that night.

hi singles! welcome bouba!!! i had a great 4th of july weekend. it was really nice to get out, relax, and just enjoy. i very rarely go out, i usually stay home read, etc...the very things some of you welcomed is the story of my usual life. i needed a change.

wanderlust - i had that happen this weekend. i met a nice guy but was sooo self concious i wasn't sure if he was sincere or making a joke of me so needless to say that went nowhere because of my low self esteem. it made me do some thinking though.

july is a busy month for me. i have shutdown in 2 weeks (cant wait :happy.
i am going to NYC to visit family and get the big tour. i haven't seen some of the stuff since i was little and want to see it now so i can appreciate where my mom grew up. so far the plans are a cirle line tour, yankees game, and a broadway show. i'm gettting so much excitement in a month i don't know how to handle it???

janet - don't go too far from us. we are here to pick you up and help out in gloomy times. i am spending this year getting the house settled the way i want and i will do the yard next year. i am in a mad rush to get the bathroom finished before my mom gets here in 14 days. i did one coat of paint tonite and got the old toilet ripped out today. i hope to have it done by this weekend. that is half the battle to get things organized for my mother's visit. i want everything just right so she can see i can handle it.

sheri- congrats on you 2nd anniversary and thanks for all the wisdome and kind words you have shared from your learning experiences. it really helps us out.

well, i'm really pooped so i'm off to bed. nite everyone! happy hump day!
kathy

Oh my....I have been so good lately...even have managed to have ice cream in the house and have eaten my ration of 1/2 cup.....but seems like no changes in weight....Seems like I get to this weight, around 238-240, and I get stuck. I exercised but ended up with a new blister.....new shoes and a wrinkled sock...grrrrrr, so took the day off so not to irrate it anymore....I will do my arm weights later.

Anyway, just wanted to check in....I am here, but haven't felt like I have much to contribute....just trying hard to stay the course!

Kathy...glad you enjoyed your weekend!

Sherie....I know EXACTLY what you mean about clothes. I waver between buying clothes that are slightly too big.....out of habit usually....and I know that it just looks like I am covering myself up...well I am....but I try to buy a size that fits....I know it looks better, even if it clings a bit! but still it is hard! I am trying to be more fashionable....

Janet....how ambitious to dig out all the pine needles...I am impressed!

Later chickies!
Lilybutt

I am sorry, I am asking if I can join and then disappear, i would like to thank you all for welcoming me. I was away for the week end came back on tuesday, but after I weigh myself I felt so disgusted , today I booked my trip to france, (I was'nt suppose to go, only my son and his godfather and his son were, but after the events of this morning in London I felt I can't let my son be away for so long. And also, by being there I will make sure we rent a car and do not use public transportation which is a a target in europeen countries. I might be overeacting, but my son is only 3 and if something happen I need to be there.
Anyway, I have a new goal I would like to loose about 15 lbs by july 27th. do you think that is possible. And do you have any suggestion. my weight is 200lbs i am 5'8. would really like to loose those 15 lbs before I go see my family.
thank you again,

Losing 15 pounds in 2 1/2 weeks MAY be possible, but it certainly isn't healthy. Most experts agree that a healthy weight loss is 1 to 2 pounds per week. You would have to lose at least 7 pounds per week to lose 15 pounds by July 27, which is more than triple the healthy weight loss rate.

My suggestion is to start eating healthier and exercising regularly and shoot for losing 5 to 7 pounds. If you haven't already been cutting back on your calories and eating lowfat, you may have a substantial water-weight loss in the first week, and that could boost your total weight loss. My suggestions:

1. Drink at least 48 oz. of water a day; 64 oz. is even better.
2. Eat at least 5 servings of fruits & vegetables a day. I suggest no more than 2 servings of fruit a day because they're high in sugar. The more fresh veggies you can eat, the better. Frozen is next best, last is canned.
3. Reduce the amount of simple/refined (white) carbs you're eating and increase the amount of complex (brown) carbs. For example, switch from white bread and pasta to whole wheat and switch from white rice to brown.
4. Watch your sugar intake...1 bitesize piece of high quality dark chocolate is better than eating a whole candy bar that won't satisfy you as much.
5. Eat out no more than once a week. Cook & pack a healthy lunch if you work outside the home.
6. Exercise at least 3 times a week for at least 30 minutes per time. Get your heart rate up with cardio but don't ignore toning and weight training. Weight training or resistance exercise builds muscle and muscle burns fat.
7. Portion control what you eat...weigh it, measure it, or learn to visually measure it. For example, a serving of meat should weight 2-3 oz. or be about the size of a deck of cards or the palm of your hand.
8. Don't skip meals. In fact, try to eat something about every 3 hours from the time you get up until 3 hours before you go to bed. What I do is eat breakfast, then have a snack mid-morning, then eat lunch (lunch is my main meal of the day), then eat a snack mid-afternoon, then eat a light dinner, and MAYBE have a small snack after dinner.
9. Everything in moderation. If you try to force yourself to give up everything you love, you will only increase your craving for the foods you are denying yourself. If you're really craving something, have it. But have just a tiny bit and only once in a while.

Hope that helps.
Sheri

Wow...quiet around here. Is everyone out partying this weekend or did I scare you all off with my last post? LOL

Singles! Just where I need to be. May I join you? I can relate to all who said, "I can't relate to the mommies." Nothing against mommies, mind you, but the single life is a much different one from the mommy life, to be sure.

Just a brief intro: I am 35, divorced since 2000, no kids, 2 pets - a dog and a cat who I love to bits. Am currently at my highest recorded weight. From looking at pictures, I am pretty sure I weighed more in high school, but I refused to get on a scale back then so I am not really sure. My lowest weight ever was 160 and I looked pretty good then. (I am 5'11") My goal is somewhere around 165. I've done all the diets in the past. Wish I could have all the money back I have spent on meetings, prepackaged food, supplements, etc. Anyway, I am currently doing WW on my own. Lord knows they have made enough money off of my many stops and starts over the past 7-8 years!

I guess that is it for now. I look forward to getting to know everyone better and to all the support. Have a great Sunday afternoon, everyone!

I'm single as well... 22... never been married (did live with a guy for 2 years however)... no kids... I don't feel like I can should even bother dating again until I am in control of my weight again. I am definitely too young to be getting married but it depresses me that my weight could be keeping me from meeting my soulmate

Welcome, Xena and cuqt!! So great to see new people in our little corner of the world. Look forward to getting to know you both.

Hi and welcome to the new friends!!!!! Seems this particular board can get quiet form time to time, but don’t despair…..we seem to chime back in! Speaking for myself, I tend to read and wait until I have something to add, so just because I haven’t posted doesn’t mean I wasn’t here!

Sheri….No I pretty sure you didn’t scare anyone off! Those were all great reminders of just plain old healthy habits…..Thanks for the reminders!

Xena…..Love your kitty!!! Looks like a tortishell calico….I had one named Sophie, she has been gone for a while now though…she was a sweetie! Now I have 3 new kitties…..not all at once, but as my old girls left me, I got new ones…..I love them to death! I will reintroduce myself to you….I am 43, never married, no kids, except the furbabies! I hear you bout the money….I lost over 100 pounds once on WW…took about a year and ˝. I did great, but then had some health problems and gained it all back plus. Been working on it little by little now, was at a high of 320, but done to 236 as of today!!!!! By just counting calories, I use Fitday, exercising, although I haven’t done much this summer!, and trying to eat healthy. Sometimes being single make that easier, but sometimes it makes it harder. I finally got myself a new gas grill, and have been grilling out chicken, ground turkey, shrimp, an occasional hamburger, steak or pork chop. So I find I am not relying on the Lean Cuisine’s as much as I have in the past and feel much more satisfied. I am in educator and off for the summer, so cooking is it easier right now, when I go back and the weather gets cold, I sure I will back to them!!

Cuqt…..now now now, I am feeling a bit motherly which is VERY unlike me, but don’t let you weight keep you from dating…..I know it is easier said than done, but I have had a much happier and more fulfilling dating life overweight than at an “ideal”. Why…not sure, but I am much less focused on food (I find I don’t like to go out when I am on a roll losing, even on a date….don’t want to “go off the diet”). And maybe I find others attracted to ME…not the way I look. Now I do have 20+ years on you, so I have no idea what the “young men” are like today, but the key for me seems to be to live a healthy lifestyle, and try as much as I can to be happy in my life, and then things just seem to fall in place….Polyannaish I know, but it really works for me!

Everyone have a great start to the week!!!

Lilybutt

hi singles!! welcome xena and melissa! i'm glad you could join us.

had another busy weekend. i'm always doing something in summertime. i went to a zztop concert last nite. i was feeling the effects of a few too many cocktails this morning. today i had a bridal shower at 1pm and a bday party at 3pm. what a long day feeling the way i was. i have to go to my tops meeting tomorrow and weigh in. that should be interesting.

i finally got my bathroom finished wed/thurs nite. it looks really nice and i even impressed myself. i was up really late finishing it and was pooped on friday.

sheri - you always give good advice so don't think you scared anyone away. and we appreciate the advice too.

melissa - i am going to be 40 soon and i have that dating phobia thing too. i am working on it though. i am trying to change my mindset from being so self concious. i don't think people are as critical as we think. my last guy did quite a job on my self esteem and that is a big problem i am working on. i used to be outgoing and it seems the last year i clammed up from the world but i am feeling better this summer. i am forcing myself to go out and do things which is making me feel like i was missing the old me and it is getting easier.

lillybutt - i too love my furbabies. i have 2 doggies that i love dearly. they say you have one pet in your life that you just bond with perfectly and my molly is that one. i've had her since she was a pup and she will be 12 this year. my 2nd girlie, missa, i recently acquired custody from a friend because she was too much for her to take care of. missa belonged to another friend before that so i have known her for a while and couldn't stand her going to strangers so i said i'd take her.

well, i have to hit the hay and get rested up from the weekend. have a great week. only 9 more working days till vacation for me. woohooo!!!
kathy

So...where do you ladies meet men that you date? I haven't dated in several years (since the last one moved to California) and it seems that part of the problem is that I just don't get anywhere to meet men. When I was young, I went out to bars all the time and met loads of guys that way...but, then again, that isn't the best way, I think. Now, if I go out, it's to a restaurant with a group of friends and that isn't exactly easy to approach!

I get some appreciative looks as I'm driving down the road but where is that going to get me? LOL I have had an older man or two be a little friendly in the grocery store (a first for me--I used to hear of people hooking up in groceries and thought it was an urban legend!) but I'm not into older men! LOL

So...where do you find them? Or do they just find you?

lilybutt and corningkat, thanks for the encouraging comments! sheriaVA - i was wondering the same thing. i definitely i am not interested in the bar scene right now. i've been contemplating going to church activities ... i figure if i'm going to find a good, smart, not so judgemental guy... i'll probably find him at church.

of course it would help if i could lose some weight and get into some pretty "church clothes" again :P