Quote:
Originally Posted by miholmes
Day 5, so far so good. I did have a terrible time last night though, I'm getting certified for adoption!...
Congratulations! I have a comment for you about adoption -- or for people who know people who have adopted-- an "If I knew then what I know now.."
We adopted our children and don't have any regrets - so there is the good news disclaimer!

However, when we first got our first child I think I actually went through post-partum depression or something -- it becomes a very emotional time and not in a good way. There is a lot of "before" support, getting all the paperwork and house studies ready but after you're basically on your own. A "stranger" arrives and you are supposed to instantly be bonded with this person -- but no "9 month" waiting period or the "baby stage" to get to know each other, cuddle, etc. Routines all take awhile to learn and time to develop trust with your new "bundle of joy". It is an exhausting time. And while you just want to weep and scream in exhaustion and frustration, everyone says "Oh you must be SOOO happy to have your dreams come true" and really, that adds to the guilt. You don't want to complain to anyone that you're tired or frustrated as everyone knows how long you've been waiting...
Well you get the picture

I just tell you that so you can find a good friend NOW and tell them that you may need them to vent to so you know you have someone who will understand when the emotions flood. You also should know that may happen for your own strength -- if you're an emotional or stress eater, then you're "armed" from the get go.
Adoption is a wonderful thing and I have no regrets. I just didn't "know" that I wouldn't be feelin' all "love and joy" for quite awhile, like I "imagined" I would feel at being a new mom. I always like to tell new moms-to-be that everything you're feeling -- the good and the bad -- is ok.
I hope all works well for you. It's a long waiting game but worth the wait!