I'm just checking in. I haven't had a binge but I am really still paying for my last binging activity, lots of stomach and digestive issues still. I am hoping that it reminds me over and over as to why I shouldn't do it-binge. I am still very bloated, very irritated, very emotionally.

I have been asking myself about this need or want to lose weight. I am questioning if the constant want to drop the pounds add to the problem of binging, if I need to address only one of those issues at a time..such as learning to get full control of the binging and address that, then focus on losing the weight. I don't know. It doesn't seem like its mattered over the years.

Weight wise I get as low as the 170's, and can maintain that type of weight but never get lower. I am wondering just what lies buried deep inside, that makes it so..I was in the 180's a year ago so even now I am less than I was, but not as happy as I was last Feb when I weighed 152. Should I ditch the scale? Should I try to only focus on eating healthy, being happy, not focusing on what the number says? I don't want to turn 41 in May without having taken a large step in the binge eating issue. The problem is, my binge eating has gotten worse over the past couple years, I am worse now at 40, than I was at 30. I weight less, but I am more UNHEALTHY and hurting myself.

I have downloaded some samples of books about binge eating, thanks for mentioning the books on binge eating.

The drive thru, while i haven't gone to the Starbucks (only because my step-daughter works there) this morning I was facing this same issue square in the eye. I had planned on going to the drive thru coffee shop on the way to work, even started the car early so I'd have time. I still felt pretty yucky after a horrible digestion issue last night and into this morning, I talked myself out of the coffee stop only by saying I wouldn't' enjoy it since i already felt bad.

I suffer from huge stomach, intestinal issues from binging ,and also ulcerative colitis. I know that the eating/binging doesn't help and only makes this worse, and then there is the stress..when I am stressed it is so much worse and that is what happened yesterday..after a hugely long day with stress lately, emotional and mental, it all came to a head last last night around bed time.

To all those that have hung on, congratulations on plugging along and mentally reward yourself-celebrate what you have done. For those like myself that keep having ups and downs, we can just keep going-right>

Checking in as well.

I had a huge wake up call today. I post my weekly weight in the Valentine's day challenge discussion, and I realized that I actually haven't lost more than 2 lbs since September. I've been yoyoing all over the place when it comes to checking my eating, and I've fallen into this rut where I just try not to overeat, rather than actively eat less than I should. Well, no more. I'm going to cut out eating between meals completely. I've done it once so I know I can do it again.

I've been busy and offline for a few weeks. But I've been doing well. Not weighed in for at least a week. Haven't tracked any calories in nearly two weeks. Have exercised five days a week consistently for months. And have been doing really well with the mindful eating. So yesterday a couple people told me they thought I had lost more weight. I really don't know. I had to get new smaller bras last week.

I had a bunch of holiday errands to run today, and I was a little apprehensive about venturing out into the Friday holiday scene. All turned out well, though: people were helpful and upbeat everywhere I went. They were even having a wine tasting at the Co-op, so while I waited for Bob's scrip to be filled at the pharmacy, I got to drink a couple glasses of Pinot Grigio, my favorite white.

My monthly weigh-in is usually on the 22nd, but I'm going to do it tomorrow, a day early, because I'm going to allow myself a bar of dark chocolate at our Yule celebration. I realized today that I don't even care about how much weight I've lost this past month, or if I've lost any at all, because I've just about wrapped up my mini-goal of 30 days of no emotional, compulsive, or binge-type eating. I can't believe how utterly changed I feel, to have that horrible monkey off my back. Cookies & candy & donuts & their ilk are no longer ordering me around and making me miserable. =whew= I have so much to be grateful for!

My best wishes to all of you for a lovely weekend filled with peace, comfort, and joy...

Hi all! I'm joining the thread in hopes of breaking the binging habit which has seemed to rear its ugly head especially badly this month. :/
I slipped majorly last night…. I went to my company's holiday party (I even prepared myself by eating beforehand) and I ate 10 HUGE cookies, and a TON of crackers/cheese… more candy than I can count. I woke up today feeling awful. But today is a new day. I have a second work related party today, so I am going in with the intention of not even starting with the sweets. Not even one. Because, apparently, I can't even have just one. This door is so difficult to close once it's been opened….

Welcome to the thread, Songofsusannah (Stephen King fan?). Nice to have you here

My check in for today. I went for a movie (Desolation of Smaug... oh jesus, I fell in love with about 6 people in the movie) and had popcorn and a small pepsi. Not good, but once I got home I decided to skip dinner, which I think evens out my calories for the day since I only had lunch before that.

I was pleasantly surprised to find that I don't like pepsi (or coke, or colas in general) much anymore. I could only have about half the cup before I got sick of it and wasted the rest. When I started out with the weight loss thing, I used to have at least a 3 to 4 bottles of coke each week, but cut it out completely for a couple of months. If I managed that without too much pain I think I can cut something else out. Like fried food (which will be torture). Or something else. I don't know.

Hello all. I won't be back this year but I thought I'd check in

Aside from my planned TOM late night eating (because 2 hours after dinner I'm starving again ), I've only had one night of midnight snacking. I'm going to switch to maintenance over Christmas and pick up my weight loss next year.

Good luck to you all.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year

I ate at a buffet for supper last night and totally overdid it. Now I'm paying for it. It is 4 AM and I can't sleep. My stomach feels even fuller now than it did when I got done eating at 6 PM yesterday evening. It hurts and I can hear it gurgling and making noises. I'm tired and just want to go to sleep but when I lay down, I feel like I'm going to throw up. Binging is not worth it at all. I can't believe I ate so much at that buffet. Ugh!

I have a little Christmas fun to share with you guys. It starts with a poem titled "Nicolas Was" by Neil Gaiman:
And here's the animation of the poem.. Enjoy!

Tomorrow will mark one month of no binging. Physically I feel really good, but mentally I am a mess. The emotions and memories that I had been stuffing with food are continuing to come up and with more intensity.

I tried to see if I could take the edge off the feelings by allowing myself one "free/eat whatever I want" meal. We go to In-N-Out as a family once a week. Lately I've been getting a cheeseburger, leaving 1/2 to 1 bun behind, and iced tea with lemon, sweetened with Stevia. In the old days, I would get the burger with fries and a full sugar soda. So for this "free" meal, I planned to eat my old order. (Note: this meal was not a binge for me in the past, just poor choices.) It backfired. Even though I didn't finish the food, I ended up nauseated and feeling "high", but not in a good way (if there really is such a thing, anyway). So, I guess I won't be doing that again.

I don't really crave to eat like I used to, I just wish the emotions would go away. As difficult as it is, I'm thankful that stuffing them with food is not working, anymore.

I'm looking forward to weighing in on Wednesday. I skipped last week's weigh-in because I was starting my cycle and was incredibly bloated. I had been eating really well, but was just super PMSy and didn't want to make myself feel as though I had failed because of what clearly would have been water weight. My clothes are much looser, so we'll see what Wednesday brings.

Hope everyone is enjoying the season and hanging in there.

Blessings,

J.

Congratulations, Jubilee, on going a whole month without binging! Way to go! Actually, we could congratulate each other, because I'm on day 32 without binging. I find that I'm not even having the cravings for sweets the way I used to have. I have no sugar at all in my current diet, and that really helps me in not getting into that horrible "eat sugar, then want to eat more sugar" cycle.

I know what you mean about the emotions, too. I'm having trouble with anger and depression feelings. But I feel SO much better without that nasty binge demon bugging me all the time, I'll take the negative emotions as they come. I'm finding that a bit of dried fruit—like raisins or dates—can take the edge off my anger without triggering a binge.

I hope you have someone you can talk to—I mean really talk to...

Congratulations, Fiona! I didn't realize we had stopped binging around the same time. It definitely is a good thing!

My technique for addressing the feelings that come up is still working, but is now becoming overloaded. Initially, the feelings would appear every few hours, but now they seem to be constant. I'm still processing through the feelings; I'm just falling behind.

I am able to really talk to my husband, but I don't want to overload him, either; he always has a lot of stress at work when the end of the year is here.

Thanks for the encouragement. Keep up the great work!

J.

Im just posting to say hello and basically post because i feel on verge of a binge. I've only been binge free for a few days but thats the longest ive tried in a few years. Something comes over me for a while and suddenly I can resist foods for a short while..But i will likely need to add more food because the dieting mentality is too strong. I just inhaled some almonds and don't want to slip tonight there is an item in the freezer calling my name its a shame i share an apartment and can't fully control what's in my place.

Ive been literally going to buy my meals daily because if I stock up on say lean cuisines I will likely eat more than one.

UH
I will keep try to distract myself tonight


The only Holiday derailment I may face is on Dec 26th which will be my holiday dinner at a buffet. It's too soon for me to go to a buffet but I'm going to eat whatever I feel like for that one meal and try my best not to let it open the floodgates

Good for you, davina, that you came here to post—instead of giving in to the binge! I find it helps me to do that as well: somehow casting the impulse into words makes it easier to resist. It's when the urge is utterly intangible, not verbalized, that's when it takes over your body and actions.

It must be hard to have to share a kitchen with someone else, but is there a way you can clearly demarcate which food is yours? My husband and I share space in the kitchen, but we each have designated areas: one side of the freezer vs. the other side, this cabinet vs. that one. It also helps to develop a very strong mental distinction between what belongs to you, and what belongs to them. If you did not buy it, it's not yours to eat...something like that.

Best wishes for getting through the next few days binge-free!

One way to slow the feelings down is to write about them, by hand, in a journal. At any one time, I always have a journal for "spilling"—just writing down exactly what it is I'm feeling, what thoughts are charging through my mind. I don't know it that would be helpful to you, or not—or if you're already doing it.