My "ugh" moment came in the summer of 2008. I went to the beach with a bunch of friends and their girl friends. I didn't think too much of it, until we got to the beach and I had to take off my clothes and reveal my bathing suit. I didn't realize just how insecure I had become about my weight. Here were a bunch of smokin' hot 20 somethings in bikinis... and then there was me. I spent the whole trip trying to cover myself up because I was so embarrassed. It made it virtually impossible to enjoy myself. Yet, these other girls, who were fit and toned, didn't care about any of that because they knew they looked good. I wanted to know what that felt like.

There are no pictures of me. Not even with my newborn. None. Noone takes pictures of the fat girl and I dont go out of my way to get in them either. I want pictures of my family and that includes me. And Id like them to be decent pictures. I want to live and be present in my own life.

Kick-butt goal!!! I love it!

I, too, realized the other day that my husband I aren't in any pictures together basically since our wedding. I believe there are three with us together, but those are absolutely horrible!!!

Pictures are EVIL until..........hehehehe that's how i look at it...when i go to my mom's and see pics of me I want to vomit but that's reality at it's best i suppose

I've been working on the inside me for the past 8 years, and finally decided it was time to work on the outside me, too. It's difficult to really look at oneself and change the 'character defects' in order to become someone with whom we could love (ourselves). Totally know what you mean here. Congrats!

Alyssa your awesome and i'm so glad to have a "buddy" now here and privately....WE are going to do it this time for OURSELVES....we have to .....ya know? PM me catch me up on your past few days

I've had a few "UGH!" moments over the years, mostly looking in the mirror and being disgusted or not fitting into most of my clothes, including my "fat" ones.

But the most recent one that has me fully committed and in the "I'm not getting any fatter" mindset happened last month when we were running laps for a new sports team I joined. I couldn't even run a whole mile! I had to stop and walk a few times. This is coming from a girl who used to run 3 - 6 miles at a time with no problem...just a few years ago.

And then I realized that although I perceive myself to be the same person as I was before, my body has changed and I can't do a lot of the things I used to be able to do quite easily. And that's scary.

Yes, this used to happen a lot to me. Thinking I was looking good and then pictures showing me otherwise. I used to have a go at the person who took the photo, for making me look so fat.

I've had my share of Ugh moments. The first one, that spurred my initial weight loss of about 30 lbs was when I was 260 and wanted to leave my husband for various reasons. I was doing dishes one night and talked myself out of leaving him because "I'd never find anyone else and I'd spend the rest of my life alone." I was 23 at the time. Then I realized what I was saying to myself, I was letting my physical appearence and my self conciousness about that trap me in an unhappy and unhealthy marriage. It took me about a month, but I left my husband and immediatly started losing weight, just from being happier and making my own choices. I stalled out for about three years on the weight loss while I became increasingly more lonely and instead of getting out and dating I was sitting at home and eating my emotions.

Then, at a bar one night, there was this really "swell fellow" that "hadn't seen me around there before." He bought me a couple of drinks and when I left the bar he followed me, expecting to get laid because he bought the fat girl a drink. apparently to him, fat meant desperate and easy. That shook me up. Then, when I was complainig about it to my former bff, she said, "well, when you go to the bar with us people buy us all alot more drinks." Meaning, I make them look better.

So, essentially, my ugh moment, was realizing that yes, my weight was going to leave me lonely forever. Of course, now I'm in the 190's after getting as low as 158 and I'm still alone, but I've found better reasons to get and stay thin since then.