I am really happy to have found this thread. Like many of you, I am sick of "being on a diet", I even find I resent the phrase and what it means to me. I read someplace that when you are eating, if you listen to your body, you will sigh when you are full. It's wierd and it takes some practice to catch it, but it seems to work for me. If anything it's practice in listening to your internal cues.

When I was trying to quit smoking and someone would offer me a cigarette, I'd say "no thanks, I'm trying to quit". I am taking the same approach to crappy foods. I do allow myself some, like today I'm having a small slice of birthday cake for a coworker's birthday, but otherwise, when I see the candy dishes at work, I tell them I'm trying to cut down or I'm trying to quit. It helps me to keep myself in check but it also lets others know that I appreciate that they are trying to include me, but I'm okay.

It's easier for me to just concentrate on eating right. I still keep calories in mind because it's a hard habit to break, but it does help me to talk myself out of emotionally driven, bad choices.

I do buy low cal items along with the healthy produce. BUT I don't eat anything I don't like just because it's served or offored. The diet products I buy are low calorie cool whip, jello, jello pudding, whipped peter pan peanut butter, and I use splenda. I use these products because I find them just as good as the higher calorie. And, calories do count! I like to eat well, and I love greens and most vegetables. As for listening to your body, it takes the stomach 20 minutes to signal the brain that it's full. If you don't eat slowely and listen, you're going to over eat. There is no such thing as "good" or "bad" food. There is just wise and unwise chocies.

Go make good chocies today, Freda

I am glad to see the people who started this thread hanging around! I really appreciate there being a forum to talk about starting to get back to the basics, and not, "How much can I lose in April". I have two very healthy, very tiny children - who raised them?? I do know that I never made food an issue with them - they were allowed to leave food if they weren't hungry, and to make their own choices. Now I can learn a lot from watching them. My son loves to cook and likes a wide variety of tastes. BUT - he wouldn't eat his most favorite food in the world if he wasn't hungry. They both also eat small portions and don't belong to the "clean plate" club. Let's keep this group going for people who want to be "naturally thin".
Marsha

My philosophy is this " What did we do before there were all the fastfood places and the instant frozen dinners?" "How did we, as a society get so busy that we came to rely on these things?" "When did I start to hate cooking?".

My answers were this - we sat down as families at the table and ate a dinners that mom cooked from using "whole foods". Hey, I need to drop some of my activities during the week and slow down. And lastly, I need to start enjoying my food and start to love cooking and trying new things out.

I purged my bookshelf of any cookbooks that were too complicated, did not show the nutritional values, had no pictures ( ) or were things I would never get around to making.

I kept 5 of my Weight Watchers cookbooks and my Suzanne Sommers cookbooks and donated the rest to the local library. I'm now actually using my cookbooks on a weekly basis and enjoying experimenting with new recipes! My husband now takes 2 nights a week to cook and is enjoying it too.

Mauvaisroux, I totally agree with what you said ... what did we do before convenience food etc?

And Marsha, I agree that we need to get back to good basic food.

Freda, I realise that calories do count ... I seem to have spent half my life counting the darn things ... and eating way too many of them!! Now that I'm not 'on a diet', and not obsessing about counting them, I seem to be consuming less of them ... but they are always in the back of my mind, which I guess is a good thing, as whenever I choose say, breakfast cereal, I'll go for the lower calorie option rather than something that's high in sugar and cals. And because I'm not 'on a diet', and this is MY choice rather than following some diet plan, I feel a lot more in control.

My problems began when I got married and left home, then along came the kids and life was oh so busy! Mom used to do all the cooking and it was always basic but good wholesome food ... meat/chicken/fish with lots of veggies or salad. Nowadays, due to our busy lives it's all too easy to rely on fast food takeaways or convenience meals, instead of taking the time to cook a proper dinner from scratch. I'm not saying that the occasional induldgence isn't ok, but really, cooking a healthy dinner from scratch doesn't have to take hours to prepare. I think people have just become lazy and too often take the easy option.

I've also been giving my cooking skills a good workout over the past couple of weeks. I used to really enjoy cooking, hubby and I used to cook great dinners together years ago before the family came along, after that we never seemed to have the time or energy to bother! So, my cookery books have been dusted off, and I have a few new additions full of great healthy recipes which I'm really looking forward to trying out.

Hope everyone has a great weekend!

Nichola

Hello... I agree with you about dieting, and I don't do it but prefer to just have my own healthful eating plan. However, we are not quite on the same wavelength because I don't go with the "eat anything you want but stop when full" thinking... IMO that may make me thin but it won't make me healthy. But you need to find what works for you so if this is helping, I don't mean to sound discouraging! Go for it! :banana:

I eat a LOT... but I eat healthful things such as lots of fruit and veggies; but I also eat chicken and even beef in small portions. I feel sooooooo much better than when I fill myself up with processed foods and chemicals, etc. And most of all, I find that when I get into the healthful things and get the rest out of my system, the cravings stop; so much of that junk is addictive and just makes us want more, whereas more healthful foods satisfy our bodies' needs.

And I don't spend a lot of time cooking! Mostly I find good crockpot recipes and make up sometimes two potsful on a weekend and have great freezer meals. All I do is fix up a few fresh veggies (Foreman grill or bake in oven often) and have a fantastic, healthful dinner... and also make up stuff for work lunches... yum! Even if I do get tempted during the day I can say "no" and remind myself what a yummy lunch and/or dinner I have coming!

I too agree with getting back to basic foods... my general rule is "if God created it, it's probably okay to eat it; if mankind messed around with it and added a bunch of junk and chemicals, use caution." It works!!! I am eating FAR more than most people on "diets" (at my doctor's advice... she said if I did this I'd lose just as much weight as if I ate a lot less and mess up my metabolism.... and she is RIGHT). People can't believe some of the stuff I am eating while trying to lose weight... but it's working! And I am not deprived but eating the best ever!

Congratulations on your determination! Stick around; there is lots of support and encouragement here, as well as great tips and practical advice!

I agree with you Misti. I think when people say "eat anything you want" they just mean that by taking away the "I'm on a diet, I can't have that" thinking, it frees them to think about what, and how much, they really want to eat. I do like to have some chocolate now and again, but when I really think about what my body craves the most, it is about 90% healthy food! Also, when I am not thinking about depriving myself, I don't feel the need to overeat it in shame, but to just have a few bites, and then know I can have it again when I need to!
The same thing kind of works for exercise for me - can really put it off when it is part of some plan, but today, it is beautiful here in Minnesota, and I FEEL like going for a walk. Maybe we should take some time this week to tell a little bit more about ourselves for the group who wants to hang around here in the NO DIET zone. Have a great Palm Sunday people - what an uplifting time of the year.
Marsha

Hi Everyone, hope you all had a great weekend!

Marsha, as I'm the first to visit the thread since your post, I'll kick off with telling you all about myself. Here goes ......

I'm 43, married for 19 years, with two teenagers ... son aged 17, and daughter aged 13 (14 at the end of this month). I'm originally from the UK but have been living in Hong Kong for the past 5 years due to hubby's job.

I was a chubby child for about 3 years, from the age of about 9-11, but then lost the weight naturally. I was fairly slim (never skinny) throughout my teens and early twenties, but was always trying out various fad diets in the hope of being slimmer. Gained a few extra pounds after being married for a couple of years ... then along came the kids and I gained even more!! I feel like I've spent half my life yo-yoing, trying out one diet after another in the hope of finding 'the right one', but I've never been able to the lose the weight and keep it off successfully. I've managed to get within a few pounds of my goal on a couple of occassions (years ago!) ... only to regain it all when I've gone back to my old eating habits.

I now KNOW that 'going on a diet' simply doesn't work for me ... It puts me under too much pressure and I end up obsessing about food, which leads to me binging on anything and everything in sight ... only to begin the vicious cycle of yo-yoing again and again.

So, in a nutshell, that's me I feel so much happier and more in control of my life now that I've decided to give up 'dieting' ... I HATE that word!

Good luck to everyone here who's decided to take the same course of action. I look forward to hearing all about you and getting to know you all.

Nichola

hi everyone, Let me introduce myself too. My name is Freda, i'm 58, married and have 1 son and 2 grandchildren. I work part time as an RN at a local hospital.

I was so thin when I was growing up! I look at pictures of myself now and know I was too thin! But I was very active and ate anything I wanted! A lot of junk! And my mom ( a great southern cook) made everything fried and loaded with grease! So' i've really had to revamp my cooking. I bake, broil, poach eveythign now. It takes a little planning to eat healthy. I make a menu every week and buy the food so I know what's for meals and don't have to think about it. I keep snacks in the car so ifI'm out and starving I don't have to stop at some fast food place and make a bad decision! Planning is the key for me! Of course calories count! But I want to be healthy too! So I choose healthy food. It's not a big sacrafice. I love sweetpotatoes, corn, greens......

I agree with Misty, cutting the calories back too far just leaves you too hungry and lowers your matabalism.

Everyone. make this a great day, Freda

Great idea about the intros and keeping this thread going. I'm up early to get ready for work but will come back later and share more!! And thanks to those who have already shared a little about themselves!

I have been reading this thread and I love it. You all are wonderful!

I'll take some time to introduce myself as well. I'm a 29 (almost 30 ), mother of a 5 year-old boy and married. I have 2 dogs and a cat that I absolutly adore, though the cat doesn't like me much... actually she might just HATE me! We affectionatly call her devil kitty ; she's a crazy one!

I live a pretty good life, but it is really hectic. I graduate next month with my Social Work degree, I go back to start on my Master's degree in July. Between working part-time, going to class and practicums (20 hours a week at an agency for free), being mom and wife and pet owner, life really does go by fast. Thank goodness I have a lot of support at home!

I have been overweight my entire life, though I grew up with an entire family of thin people; I have no idea where I got the genes I got! I have made a committment to myself to change the way I live through exercise and better food choices. I am not as concerned with stringent requirements as I am about feeling better about myself. I struggle, however, making sure that I have good food to eat and time to exercise with all that I have going on. The vending machines and Taco Bell have been good friends of mine for the last 4 years due to a hectic schedule. I have, however, managed to make sure that my kid eats better than I do. One of my biggest fears is that my son will struggle with weight as I have; this is a large part of why I am making the change I am making.

When I started this, my first goal was to get on the treadmill every day for 21 days as I have always been told that it takes 21 days to start a new habit. I did it! Today is day 26 and I honestly feel guilty if I don't. Now that I have gotten in the routine of getting on the treadmill, I feel comfortable thinking about better food choices and paying more attention to the scale. I have to admit that since I have been on the treadmill, I have made better food choices already... I guess they just go together. Since I started I have lost 21 pounds (I started more than 26 days ago, mentally preparing myself!), I can't believe what exercise can do!

Thanks for reading this incredibly long post. You are so wonderful!
Sassybiscuit

Happy Monday. it is a beautiful morning here in Minnesota - predicted high of 70 today. We are sooo ready for spring!

A short bio:
I am 51 years young - married for almost 32 years. I live in south central Minnesota where i have been an elementary teacher for 30 years. DS is 28 - lives and works in Minneapolis. DD is 24 - lives close by and works at an alternative high school and coaches the regular high school gymnastics team. DH farms. I grew up as the only thin child in the house - i was the athlete. DM was a fabulous cook - very heavy herself and actually had a gastric bypass over 20 years ago. She is still living, but has been bedridden for the last 2 years with a disease called multiple system atrophy, DF is her primary caregiver - she is so ready to die, can't move a single muscle including her eyelids by herself, but her heart keeps beating. DF is/has been normal weight, but I have two sisters who struggled with weight growing up. My older sister is extremely heavy now, younger sister has slimmed as an adult. My weight got started with both pregnancies and just never was much under control after that. I don't see myself as an obese person but would like to lose about 40 pounds - think that probably means I am obese! I just can't do the whole on a diet thing anymore - largely because it obviously hasn't worked!!
Enough for now - here's to a happy, healthy Monday!
Marsha

Just caught your post. I think I was composing mine when yours came through. What a great job you are doing - how long are you on the treadmill every day? You have made a positive lifestyle change that is giving you some VERY positive results. WTG!
Marsha

Thanks Nichola, Freda, Sassybiscuit and Marsha for your introductions.
Marsha, I live in Michigan and we too are so ready for spring. Looks like today will be a nice one for us as well!

I am 37 and live in East Lansing, Michigan. I got married a year and a half ago and have never been happier. Like you, Sassybiscuit, I have a few pets, three dogs, a cat and a parrot. I also have two step kids (16 and 18) who stay with us from time to time. I have just started my own business doing virtual reality photography for the tourism industry here in Michigan. My company is called Revolutionary Views (revolutionaryviews.com) if you don't know what virtual reality photography is. I love what I do but starting your own business is very stressful.

Anyway, I have been a "normal" weight most of my life. I was also a smoker starting at 16. Around 30 I started trying to quit and finally did when I turned 33, however the process of trying and then finally succeeding has left me with a lot of extra pounds and a much slower metabolism. Diets don't work for me for the same reasons you all have mentioned. I feel deprived and then binge. It's a very depressing cycle.
I am a healthy eater and a vegetarian. My husband and I do a lot of cooking and grow an enormous amount of vegetables in the summer. My main problem is that I am an emotional eater and I eat a lot. I have a tough time leaving food on my plate even when I reach full. Too much is too much, no matter what you eat.

I can't wait to hear more about everyone here and look forward to making some friends. I used the support of a forum when I quit smoking and it was the smartest thing I ever did. Thanks everyone for sticking around and making this thread come to life.

Hugs,
kona

I think that we must've been doing it at the same time, I didn't see yours either!

My first goal was to get on the treadmill for 21 days; it didn't matter how long. I made an excel sheet of what I am doing (as incentive and it lets me see how long I've been doing it) and the average time I am on the treadmill is about 30 minutes. In the beginning I wasn't doing so much, lately (the last 10 days or so), I've been in the 40-45 minute range.

I have been thinking about what my next "non-weight related" goal would be, and I think that I have decided to make mile goals for each month. I decided to walk 45 miles in April. I've done 15 so far, so I am on track for the month. I figure that it doesn't matter how long I am on the treadmill, just as long as I do the miles I have negotiated with myself... does that make sense? I could do them quick or slow; just do them. Having a goal like this fits me because it allows me to take a day off if I need to and not feel guilty, I just have to make up the miles in the time left of the month.

You made me think! I have been doing some thinking about heart rate; there is a difference between a fat-burning heart rate and an aerobic heart rate. I think that the fat-burning one is lower. Does anyone know the answer?

Thanks Marsha! It is so nice to virtually meet you!