I been heavy the majority of my life--I always chuckle and say I was born fat. My lowest adult weight was 137 pounds and a size 11, and that was when I was 19 and went to that, in the improper fashion by practically starving myself, from 175 pounds and a misses' size 18 that I was when I had graduated from high school the year before.

Once I began eating 'normal' again, it didn't take long for all that weight to come back and thensome. By the time I was 23, I was already 215 at 5'4. When I hit the 300 mark, I cannot really tell you, but it wasn't a good feeling and I tried every 'quick fix' in the book to combat it, only for them to have the opposite effect. So by the age of 42 in March 2004, I had reached my highest weight of 351 and fitting into a 30/32/34....barely.

Enough was enough, I then thought.

I needed a better approach not only to help myself feel better and not be in constant physical and emotional pain, not huff and puff every time I climbed even the smallest of hills, couldn't squeeze into restaurant booths, had to hunt for chairs without arms in waiting rooms, didn't go to theaters and concerts because the seats may be too small for my fat can, and had to sit down just to put on a pair of panties.

Lucky for me, I have a supportive physician that offered me an array of healthy alternatives, and suggested a 1500 calorie/35g fat a day plan a lot of his diabetic patients used with some success (though I am not diabetic myself). At last! A plan I could live with. And here was the funny thing--I felt like I was eating more, yet I was losing weight.

I had also looked into gastric bypass surgery, which I was supposed to have this past September, but because a rare condition of malrotated digestive system was discovered on the operating table, they couldn't do the surgery. So now at present, I am being considered for the lap band procedure, which has worked well on patients with my condition.

Not every day is perfect; I still fall off the wagon now and again, but I usually have to get myself back into the mindset to get back on it and tell myself when that happens the whole thing isn't shot in the head. Though I have a LONG way to go to 150, I must admit I already feel the great benefits of losing what I have so far. I'd like to hit the 250 mark by my 44th birthday, but losing 49 pounds in 21 days is not only an unrealistic approach, it's unhealthy too. I'm just glad I FINALLY broke the 300 mark at last!!!!!

We have walked in the same shoes girlfriend!!! Even though I have such a long way to go, I am so glad to no be where I was. I was dying. Literally.

You have just given me an idea for my next big goal after my current big goal. To be at 250 by my 41st birthday. Assuming that I meet my end of January goal, that gives me 3.5 months to lose 35lbs. That is about 10lbs a month. I think that is a good goal. What do you all think? Can I do it?

10 pounds in a month sounds like a very realistic goal; that breaks down to about 2-2.5 pounds a week, which is about a healthy loss should be. As my doctor once told me, "You didn't put all that on overnight, it won't come off overnight either." More true words could not have been spoken!

Ammi – Congrats on starting your exercise program. I am so out of shape – I am just trying to build a little at a time. I hope it helps you with your wounds and your overall health and depression. It is no fun not feeling good.

Zelma – your hair looks great! I love the red. I used to do an eggplant color, which I might try again soon. I am starting to get a good bit of grey and I’m not quite ready for it.

Butterflyns – I love the tattoo! I am considering getting one once I have lost most of my weight.

Kayley – my boyfriend (also Andrew) is the same way. He is sure that when I am upset that it has something to do with him and he gets very worried. At first I thought it was a bit annoying, but actually I am really pleased that he is the kind of guy that wants to talk about feelings – so many guys aren’t like that.

Well, I have caught a nasty little cold and ended up staying home today. I was going to go to work, but the bridge that I take was closed because trucks flipped over on both sides (it was amazingly windy this morning), and then my boyfriend stopped for breakfast on his way to work and his car wouldn’t start so I had to go rescue him. That involved 15 minutes of standing outside in the rain getting drenched and an hour waiting for a tow truck. After that I really didn’t feel like going to work, so I didn’t. It will mean I will need to work over the weekend, but hopefully getting a bunch of rest today will make me feel better.

Hello All,

Oh I am a good girl lol. After the options evening at Cal's school we were going to have quite a wait for a taxi home. Daren suggested walking home so that on the way we could call into a chip shop and get something from there for tea. Well I knew if I walked anyway near there I would give in, so I said no to the walk, but more importantly that meant no to foing to the chip shop. I wish I could bottle the feeling of happiness that I had. If I could take a sip of that every time I am tempted to go off my diet, well it just wouldn't happen.

Sharon (neurotica) - No, I didn't know you were a Reiki master, how fantastic is that! Do you get to practise it much? My therapist did a session with me once when we should have been talking lol, and she wants to have me go to her house on a regular basis soon to have regular Reiki done on me. I can't wait. I will never get over how relaxed I felt, and how I honestly did feel warmth wherever she held her hand over. It was unbelievable. To feel like that regularly and to have it encourage my healing, well I can't wait. Plus she doesn't charge either which is a huge bonus.

Your goal before your 41st birthday is more than doable. I am sure you will manage that much weight and some. You definitely have been losing regularly. I have every faith that you will meet that goal!

Lilion - oh I am often tempted to do absolutely nothing and put it down to my ailments. In fact a lot of the time when I sleep away the hours I do say I need my rest I have often put exercise off for the same reason, but I realised I just can't put it off anymore. What's a ripped wound and a bit of blood anyway LOL. Seriously, I won't overdo things, but it's time to get on with my life as much as I can.

Oh what a shame that your WW weigh in showed that you gained a lb, when the office weigh in showed a loss. It's frustrating I am sure. Well hopefully the WW scales will catch up with your loss next time. Fingers crossed!

Kayley - my friend I know just what you mean when you say that Andrew asks you what's wrong and then when you say nothing he thinks you just don't want to tell him. Sometimes Daren asks me what's wrong, or why I am sighing all the time. I don't even know I am sighing half the time. So I say nothing is wrong, because like you, there is nothing wrong. But he just won't accept that. So then I get a bit sarcastic and say hmm, might be something to do with....and I waffle on about all the things that are bad in my life lol. I do feel sorry for him, he has to put up with my moods, and he cleans and dresses my wounds, all that close up proximity to my 'ladies' bits' lol and no nookies. He should get a saint hood

How did your Criminal Justice class go? I hope the nerves weren't necessary.

Katie - so how are you finding us gals on the site. Are you ready to 'put yourself out there' with us? I think you will find many friends here, and you will definitely get all the support you need. I don't think anybody here feels sorry for anybody else because we are all in the same boat. Some may have got further with their weight loss, but they started where we have and know just how hard the journey to lose weight can be. Those people are a real inspiration to me, they prove it can be done. I hope to be an inspiration to others WHEN I get to goal. Watch this space in about two years time

My hubby loves me just as I am too, but he is behind me all the way when it comes to my losing weight. He wants me to be healthy so that there is more chance of us having a longer life together.

LAnne- that is fantastic that you have left the 300s forever. I think if I can just leave them myself then I might have the extra inspiration to keep on dieting.

You have a very wise doctor, it's true that we can't expect to lose weight overnight when it took so long for us to get to the weight we are. This brings me to The Biggest Loser. They seem to encourage HUGE losses in a week, and yet another show I watch called Celebrity Fit Club says that huge losses are no good and that you aren't just losing fat, you are losing muscle. So how do The Biggest Loser people say it's safe to lose so much weight so fast?

Nancy - thanks for the congrats on my finally doing exercise again. I have put it off so many times, but now I have this great new DVD that isn't too difficult for me, it's brilliant to actually do it. I look forward to when I find it too easy and can move onto my Richard Simmons DVD lol. He is so funny.

Sorry that you are under the weather, I am sure standing out in the rain when you were helping your BF out won't have helped either. So I am glad you took the day off work, and hopefully you are feeling better now.

Felicia - glad to hear that you are doing ok. Don't worry too much about missing one of your work out sessions, just put some extra energy into your next work out. I am doing a new salsasize DVD and today was only my second time using it. The first time I could barely do it, today I managed to put in a few hip thrusts lol. It was fun.

Well I better go now, I have some emails to write before I can turn my messengers on to see who is around to chat. Bye for now,

Hugs,

Ammi

Hey everyone! I just joined this group today and think its so wonderful! There is such a huge support here. I started my diet last week and glad to report that I am down 8lbs! I hope to hear from you all soon!

STOP

PLEASE DON'T POST HERE ANYMORE. JOIN US ON THE 300+ AND READY TO TRY AGAIN #809.

Hope you feel back up to speed soon Nancy!

You mean you are doing more to snazzy up that already snazzy blog! I continue to bow before thee!

Quote:

Originally Posted by AmmiUK

I wish I could bottle the feeling of happiness that I had. If I could take a sip of that every time I am tempted to go off my diet, well it just wouldn't happen.

Every time you are able to choose yourself over a moment's gratification it becomes more a part of who you are. You just remember to love yourself as much as you love everyone else around you.

Quote:

Originally Posted by AmmiUK

Sharon (neurotica) - No, I didn't know you were a Reiki master, how fantastic is that! Do you get to practise it much? My therapist did a session with me once when we should have been talking lol, and she wants to have me go to her house on a regular basis soon to have regular Reiki done on me. I can't wait. I will never get over how relaxed I felt, and how I honestly did feel warmth wherever she held her hand over. It was unbelievable. To feel like that regularly and to have it encourage my healing, well I can't wait. Plus she doesn't charge either which is a huge bonus.

I practice when I am needed. I do more Distance Reiki than hands on because I felt that the people closest to me took advantage of the art and my generosity. It is so hard to explain, but my Master drilled into me that the responsibility of healing is between the recipient and whatever higher entity they connect with. I am just a conduit. However, as a conduit of energy it is my responsibility to not betray the oaths I took. And I don't. It is so hard to explain in this type of forum versus a voice conversation. I think that some people "expect" others to do for them what they must do for themselves. They have no more regard for Reiki and how it is used than they would spam in their email. They expect to get something with no energy from themselves.

The more you invest in your own well being the more you will benefit from Reiki. All you have to do is have an open heart and a receptive mind. I hope you are able to heal on many levels.

Congratulations and welcome!

HA! You posted while I was posting!

Sharon, my DH doesn't say anything to me about how good I look now, but I know he is happy - mostly for me. I think that he doesn't want to say too much to me because he doesn't want me to think that I am any 'better' now than I was before. He loves me no matter what, and doesn't want me to think that he prefers me smaller. At least that is what I think. He talks about my weight loss to everyone, so I know he is proud of me. And he encourages me to buy whatever clothes I want, so he is very supportive.

Just a general question to everyone out there. Towards the end of last year I stopped the contraceptive needle and was told it could take months or even years for my cycle to start again. Well, 3 weeks after the next needle was due I started my first cycle in a few years. Even before that they were just 'forced' cycles because of the contraceptive pill. Well, I got my next period about 3 and a half weeks after that and I think I have started my next one, which is only just over 3 weeks since the last one started. I have NEVER had regular TOMs, which has been mostly caused by the weight of course. So now I have lost so much weight, they seem to have come on with a vengeance. I was just wondering if just over 3 weeks apart is too close. I had my hormones checked just last week when they were checking everything else, and they were fine. Only things that were wrong were Vitamin D and B12. I would love to hear if I am normal or whether this should bother me.

Thanks for any info.

Zelma

PLEASE STOP

DON'T POST HERE ANYMORE, PLEASE JOIN US ON THE 300+ AND READY TO LOSE #309