Holy crap my body is sore!! It was my first all day shift in almost 3 weeks!! It was alright, I worked my butt off.. and it went fast. I sold 1,455 in crappy clothes today, yay for me.. heh. After work I went to see my bf, and then walked home from there. Just over 2km's straight up my mountain. I really need to take a picture of it, I told my friend about it.. and she didn't really think much of it.. until she drove me home one day. It's insane! So thats my exercise! Tomorrow? My exercise will be applying and FINDING a job! I'm thinking I might apply in a restaurant.. tips would be nice

Jill - thats awesome about the government thingy (me smrt). I agree that it's a GOOD idea to do anything you can to make more money... 1 year and you are *ready* to get married? I've been with my bf for over 5 years, and I'm still not ready for marriage. I know that my bf wants to be more financially secure before he pops the question, I agree with him.. mostly only because I barely make any money and would like to be "grown" up.. man, I really need to think about this career thing.

Marge - try the stairmaster.. I love it! It hurts so badly.. I'm crazy. Those ellipticals are really popular, this one gym I went to had like 15 of them, and they were almost always in use. Try mid morning, like 10-11am. I usually found that was the most dead time. 6 boyfriends at a time is hard to juggle, I've been know to.. date more than one person at a time. My boyfriend is the only one who could tame me

Diana - "dirty diana" i love it!! When I was young.. and rather stupid.. I used to tell people that my theme song was "I get around" by the Beach Boys. Oh man, I got really popular off that one! I suspect I really did have a bit of a reputation, which is funny because I really did NOT get around in that kinda way. Wal-Mart is evil. I worked there for almost 5 years. I was working in the photo lab, so I was pretty secluded from the rest of the store. I had some pretty bad managers, and was very mouthy.. I was never fired though.

Kimberley - I was wondering where the heck you were! I want to sleep in, you are making me jealous

I am off to watch some TV... NC tarheels won the NCAA finals Yay! I'm tired, so have a great night all

-Aimee

hey all just a quicki b4 curves...yawn....you are all too funny...I am assuming, Kimberley, that you must got to bed very late, and sleep in very late, lol, or else that was your midnight snack? lol...I am in bed at the latest 12. I really need o go to bed before that, but seems like things just pile up and I never get done before then, and yes, Aimee, you do need to take a pic of that mountain of yours, just so we can see it..lol...And Jill...I think, with me, I had dated so many people that by the time I met my DH, I was ready for marriage. If I wasn't ready by then I may never have been. We lived together for a year before we got married, I think, when it is the right person, you know, and time is irrelevent. I know of people who dated for years, lived together for most of them, got married and 6 months later were headed for divorce. Ask heather too, she lived with her first hubby for a good many years before they got married and now she is re-married to another guy. Like I said, when it is the right person, there is a feeling you have inside and you know...I hope that is the feeling you have with jeff...Well, am off, gotta get dressed..BBL, hag1!

Good morning, Fabs!

Time for the usual morning complaint--I'm tired! I didn't get to sleep till about 11:30 last night, so when that alarm went off at 4:30, oi vei! Only 4 days a week, though--get to sleep lots on the other 3 to make up for it

Quote:

Originally Posted by SwimGirl

1 year and you are *ready* to get married? I've been with my bf for over 5 years, and I'm still not ready for marriage. I know that my bf wants to be more financially secure before he pops the question, I agree with him.. mostly only because I barely make any money and would like to be "grown" up.. man, I really need to think about this career thing.

I'm not ready to get married--I'm ready to get engaged I know once he pops the question, it'll be at least another year of wedding plans and stuff. I've got a life plan, here: I want 4 kids. I want to be DONE having babies by the time I'm 30. Therefore, I must begin having babies at age 25-26 (I'll pray for a set of twins to cut down on the time spent pregnant ), which means I have to be married by 25, which means engaged by 24. So, he's got one year to make up my mind, since I will be 23 in July I know, I'm young, and I don't really need to "rush" things quite so much, but I really want to be a younger mother so all my kids will be grown up and on their own by the time I want to spend my older years with the husband. It all makes sense in my head...

Also, I think I've done a pretty good job of proving to myself that I don't need to rely on anyone else, which was the biggest step for me toward becoming "grown up." I'm definitely not completely a grown up yet (and hopefully never will be!), but since I left my parents' home in August of 2000 when I graduated from high school, I have pretty much figured everything out on my own. While I'm not exactly rollin' in dough, I'm financially stable enough to afford to rent my own apartment (which in this area is basically equivalent to paying a monthly mortgage!) and bills and student loans and yadda yadda yadda. I have lived both with other people and alone, so I know I can survive either way if I ever have to. I've also made it pretty clear to Jeff that once I'm married and kids are in the picture, divorce is not an option (unless under certain extreme circumstances). We are the adults and should be able to handle our problems without involving (or jeopardizing) our children. Since his parents just got divorced about 2 years ago, I know he's completely on-board with that idea. Once I get married, I plan to stay that way (not that anyone really plans on getting divorced, but when my friend got married at 19 and I expressed my concerns with her, she once said, "It'll be fine, Jill. If it doesn't work out, we'll just get a divorce." JUST get a divorce?! Like it's no big deal?! Like it's the easy answer, the easy way out?! Words could not adequately describe my feelings when I heard that come from her mouth).

My grandmother (who just passed away Easter weekend) and my grandfather (who passed away when I was in high school) would have celebrated their 60th anniversary this spring. My sister and I sent my parents on a trip to New York City for their 30th anniversary in November. If my psychotic and dysfunctional relatives can make it, then so can I Of course, I don't want to get married just to be married. I do love him, and he's got an amazing amount of patience when it comes to dealing with my sometimes-neurotic emotions and outbursts

Okay, enough blabbing about my Jeff. I miss him so much during the week (he stays with me Friday-Sunday night, but I don't see him at all Monday-Thursday since he lives on the opposite side of DC in Maryland and I live in Virginia--bout an hour and a half apart). Good thing I have a picture of him on my desk at work and bug him on AIM while he's at work all day

Jill~~~"I'm not ready to get married--I'm ready to get engaged I know once he pops the question, it'll be at least another year of wedding plans and stuff. I've got a life plan, here: I want 4 kids. I want to be DONE having babies by the time I'm 30. Therefore, I must begin having babies at age 25-26 (I'll pray for a set of twins to cut down on the time spent pregnant ), which means I have to be married by 25, which means engaged by 24. So, he's got one year to make up my mind, since I will be 23 in July I know, I'm young, and I don't really need to "rush" things quite so much, but I really want to be a younger mother so all my kids will be grown up and on their own by the time I want to spend my older years with the husband. It all makes sense in my head..."


Hey hon...I want to just say one thing..not that I am an expert, but maybe with age comes knowledge..I had a life plan too...I planned to be married and have 3 kids by the time I was 30...well, got married at 30 and no kids yet...Life just has its way of pulling the punches on ya sometimes, and things just do not go as planned...I hope they do for you, but a lot of times they just don't. Marriage is VERY hard. A **** of a lot harder than I ever thought it would be. Living together was hard too, but, for some reason, things change when you say "I do" ..I know that sounds nuts, but, it is very true. Ask anyone, and they will say the same thing...lol..twins run in my family, but I am having a heck of a time conceiving and carrying to full-term, granted, it gets harder the older you get ( I am 37), but we have been trying to conceive almost 5 years. I can now conceive, but cannot carry, and it is weight related, so this is why I am sticking to my guns. My neighbor is 34 and she tried to conceive for 10 years with her hubby whom she married at 23...they had to go through all kinds of fertility tests. She had twins almost 3 years ago, and now, they are not having a great time of it, because, she had no idea how much kids change marriage. And they do, I don't care what anyone says, kids change a relationship. Not saying it is bad, but just saying they do...You are young..so stop fretting and thinking you have to stick to a plan. Just go with it and relax, let things happen as they are meant to happen. Maybe he is scared because you have it all planned out, and this is somewhat intimidating to him? just a thought. Only you can know how you feel. As for divorce..i don't think anyone goes into a marriage planning to divorce the person they "Love til death do us part" unless they have alterior motives. Sometimes people just change, things change them, things happen. I would have rather my mother, for example, have divorced my father ( whom she has been married to for 50 years last July) then allow us kids be subject to years of abuse, alcoholism, and infidelity on his part. We would all be better off for it now, but she stayed, and we are who we are because of it, I love my dad for who he is now, an 87 yer old fart, but I will never forget the things he put us through. Same with Rod's mom...She left after 38 years, for one because she had changed yes, but because she was tird of being emotionally abused by him, after 38 years, she wishes she would have done it 20 years before. Even Heather, she loved the SOB she was married to and had been with for 13 years and had 2 kids with, but finally ( THANK GOD) she left him and divorced him and found someone who showed her she is worthy of living. I know, who am i to say anything to you, but I was you once too..I had been engaged before, I had been in a serious relationship before, and thought I would be happily marrried in a nice home with 3-4 kids by the time I was 30...Then things just happened and everything went in a different direction for me...
...Okay, Okay, enough already... the Dr. Is out now...HAGD!

Ladies, you all are so interesting.

I love saurkraut. Thanks for the recipe. It did seem like you were gone for a long time, Kimberley!

Diana, my family used to go to the Santa Cruz beach and boardwalk. That was a lot of fun (except for the time I laid out too long and turned my legs as red as as cooked lobster -- that was less fun). There's a huge rollercoaster there -- probably not huge anymore compared to the ones they build nowadays. When I see the stories on teenagers on the news and on talk shows, I feel like we were so innocent! My group of friends (girls and guys) used to go out and have ice cream, that would be our wild time, haha. We did drink some beer after highschool. It was all pretty G rated. To hear the stuff that 12 and 13 year olds do, shocking to me. You'd think I grew up on a different planet.

My parents were married until my mom passed away in 1996, something like 52 years. They had a good marriage. Rob and I have been together since about 1995 (wow, it's been a long time!) and we've been living together since about 1996. We might get married some day, but it's not a huge deal to me. I agree with Diana that a relationship is hard work with lots of compromise. Also, I feel as a person that I changed quite a lot from the time I was in my twenties to the time I was in my thirties. All I'd say about marriage or a committed relationship is do lots and lots of talking about all your goals, dreams, habits, likes, dislikes, needs, money, expectations, etc., to make sure you're on the same page. It's tough enough to navigate life if your sailing in the same direction, if two people start to act with cross purposes, then it can really create problems.

So, I went to the gym this morning and got on a gazelle type thing. Then did the bike and several of the weight machines. Felt good. Definitely the morning is a better time to go, not many people at all. They have a stair machine and rowing machines, I'll probably give those a try sooner or later.

Good luck on the job front, Aimee. I'd love to see pics of Vancouver and the Hill. They call my neighborhood here in Brooklyn the Slope. heh heh. It does slope about 30 degrees going up to the park.

I definitely agree that marriage (or any type of relationship, for that matter) is a lot of work. I also know that having a plan doesn't mean that everything will go according to plan. For example, I know it may be difficult for me to conceive because I only have one ovary (had the other removed along with the 10-inch cyst that killed). However, I also know that if I don't try to stick to the plan, then there's no way it will every happen! I also mentioned that I feel divorce is an option in extreme cases (I would consider ANY type of abuse to be extreme, whether physical or emotional, or even substance abuse), and I would certainly not put up with him ever cheating on me (after all, what kind of example would that be for kids?).

I'm not saying it would be easy. I'm not saying I won't be happy if everything's not perfect and peachy. I've dealt with plenty of ups and downs in my life and have overcome them all, so I know I'm pretty good at rolling with the punches. I know a lot more about myself than a lot of other people ever do (if that makes sense--I have known people who have a very difficult time admitting things about themselves, ya know?), so I also know that I'm ready whenever he is. I've lived the wild n' crazy college years, I've stopped drinking ANY alcoholic beverages (I know that I can never have just 1 or 2, so might as well stop a problem before it starts), I've lived with a 4-year old for a year, I've lived with multiple psychotic roommates, and I have lived alone. I'm definitely ready to live with Jeff And like I said, it'll be about 2 more years till we're married anyway (if he even proposes), so we've got some time to figure things out and even change our minds if necessary.

I just don't want anyone to think that I'm completely delusional in assuming my life will pan out perfectly as planned. I just know that I do have a plan and will deal with obstacles as they arrise, but for now, it's nice to imagine my perfect little world in my head Just like weight loss--I have read that if you can't picture yourself thin, then you probably never will be--you have to BELIEVE!

Jill - I have to say that I'm with Diana on this... I was married (at age 19) with every plan in line to have 2 kids (he wanted 5!) by the time I was 25 and to have the happy ever after. We lived together for 18 months before we got married (we were already engaged). He was very sweet to me the entire time we dated and were engaged. He had strong marrage values as do I. Divorce is *not* an option! With the exception of cheating and/or beating. I swear though by the time we were home from the honeymoon it was like I had married someone else completely! He was rude and a slob, he was always going out with friends or hunting/fishing without me. I felt absolutly stuck, but I had a 'plan' set in place and my values, so I had to follow that right?! We tried to have kids for over 3 years. It never happened. (Thank god now though!!!) A combination of me being overweight (I was 320 at that time and had gotten down to 297), and after seeing a fertility specialist she discovered I had a 'hostile environment' for his sperm... gross I know. Anyway, come to find out that while I was screwing my hormones up with the fertility drug Clomid, he was screwing his girlfriend! We seperated a month after I found out and were divorced less than a year later. My 25th birthday was the worst day of my life. I cried ALL day. Got really drunk and cried some more. I felt I had failed myself because I was not a mother, or a wife, I no longer had a family, or a house... it was really hard. It took a lot of self-reflection to get through that. My point is, don't put time constraints on things you have no control over. I hope that everything works out great with you and Jeff but promise to not put pressure on you or him to have unneccessary goals.

Kimberly - that Reuben Chicken sounds delish! I'll have to try it soon! And congrats on falling off your plateau!!! Woohoo!

I'm sorry, but that sounds really funny. All I see in my head is like the scene from the beginning of "Look Who's Talking" (where they show the sperm all going for the egg), and the egg like whips out a baseball bat to beat away all the sperm I'm glad you had a "hostile environment" for his sperm since it didn't work out.

I really didn't mean to start anything here, guys. I was just babbling--everyone has hopes and dreams and the perfect little picture in their minds. I was just blabbing mine out in a post. I do not pressure Jeff for anything (he actually mentioned living together before I did--I even asked him if he thought we would kill each other if we lived together, but he seems pretty confident that we'll be okay, and that is what I feed off of and use to push my own apprehension away), and my timeline is very much based on life being perfect, which I very well know it is not. Like I said, I know obstacles may (will) occur, and that's fine. Having a plan does not mean ignoring bigger issues to stick to that plan. Plans change. People change. Life changes. I know all of this. And also, like I said, I will not be unhappy if life does not go according to plan--spontaneity is half the fun of life, after all! If things don't work out with Jeff, I'm sure it's because there's someone out there that's better for me.

Jeez, I guess having spare time to babble about stuff in the morning is a bad thing. I know I sounded dumb, but I also know that a plan is good to have (not necessarily as specific as mine, but still). However, I am realistic [since I was about 10 years old, all I have ever heard is, "You're so mature for your age!"--I even had a teacher in middle school have a conference with my mother about my maturity level and how he thought everything I said was true and funny (I've always been quite sarcastic), and how he would have laughed and agreed with everything I said if I were 10 years older, but he felt inappropriate laughing at that sarcasm coming from a 12-year old]. From now on, I'll be sure to just complain about how tired I am and leave it at that (yeah right--I'm good at causing a ruckus)

Fabulous women can handle any ruckus

Howie and I were 24 when we got married. I can't imagine if I'd married my then-boyfriend Jeff at 19 or 20. There was a big change in me those 5 years. At 19, an older friend of mine said I would be a different person in 5 years and not to rush life -- boy, was he ever right.

Howie works 4pm-12:30am, so we have a rather odd schedule. We had dinner about 1:00am and he headed to bed about 2:30am. Trying to apply rules like "don't eat anything after 6 o'clock is pretty hard when your life's upside-down.

I have GOT to get back to the YMCA. I'm finally using a 3-day prescription ointment for the female thang, so swimming is definitely out. I've been spotting for 2 weeks solid, too, just insane. That part I did to myself, inadvertantly. three weeks back, my birth control pills didn't come in the mail Friday like I'd planned, so Sunday I grabbed a first white one from an old pack I kept for spares. It was a different brand (Ortho-Novum generic vs. my normal Ortho Tri-Cyclen generic) so when the pills came the next day, I thought I'd take Sunday's plus Monday's pills just to be safe. D'oh! Thus the 2-week long spot-fest.

Wowsers! I missed a lot by sleeping in today... it's interesting to see all of our different views. When I was a young girl, I always dreamed of being single and having a Fabulous life living in the Big City. I never wanted children, never wanted to be married, didn't mind the idea of having a boyfriend, but never in a million years did I think I'd be living with a guy at 23! (I'm 25 now). I think we first lived together when I was 22, man... it's been a while.

Jill - I think it's fine, to have a plan, as long as you can accept things don't always go as planned, but you seem like a sensible girl.. so I'm not worried. Everything happens for a reason. I think I'm the type of person who wants to get married (eek, scary!), and I just wouldn't take it well if my boyfriend just wanted things to stay as they are now. I think entertaining the idea of marriage and children really keeps a guy on his feet, thinking... changing.. and if he can handle all of that, you've got yourself a great man!

And I also agree with the rest of you gals... life happens, things don't turn out like we thought. If you've got a good sense of humour, and a positive outlook... things will always turn out. I don't know if that makes sense... you've just got to have faith in yourself.

So I actually live outside of Vancouver, in a suberb, Coquitlam. It's about 30-45 minutes to get to Vancouver, depending on how you go. I think I'll drag the bf out today and take a picture of my view, it's SO pretty, I can see all over the Valley, I can even see Mt Baker, which is in Washington State.

I am totally procrastinating. Ugh. I woke up so late that my whole plan of applying for jobs in the morning is gone, but there is tomorrow! I'll go get tons of photocopies, and apply for the one job I think I REALLY want (clothing store close to home). Wish me luck! I'll be back later!

-Aimee

Kimberley - we posted at nearly the same time

-Aimee

I am home! And I got an interview It's on Thursday at 3pm, I wonder if they are really ready to hire.. cuz I could quit my job on Friday! Well, give my notice.. cuz I'm not mean! I am so excited I could do a dance! The girl was really cool, and they were all wearing pink... my fav colour. So I'm gonna wear pink when I go in, dunno how that makes sense.. but it does in my crazy little head. I have to go run some errands.. bbl!

-Aimee

Oh, cool - congrats on your interview! That's be great, close to home, too.

My mom and dad had to put one of their cats to sleep today, just a little while ago, actually. DeeDee sneaked out of the house July 3 and was missing for 2 months before someone captured her and took her to the pound. A neighbor "just happened" to be there and recognized DeeDee. Well, to make a long story short, DeeDee's nutrition was surely lacking during the time she was stray and cats are prone to diseases if they don't get the right food. She developed pancreatitis.

She just kept losing weight despite eating, and then went off her food. She'd nibble here and there, but never enough. Even raw meat only tempted her a little, and then she'd turn even from it. But yet she'd meow like she was starving! She'd gotten to the point where she was skin and bones and just not doing well. The tests needed to pinpoint the problem would have been hundreds, and the vet suspected she had a tumor causing the problems.

They're just devastated. Their other cat, Tigger, was beside himself the whole two months DeeDee was gone, and now he'll have to get used to it again. The lady who bred them both will have some adults availble for adoption after a bit, so mom and dad might get another.

Well, I need to log my calories for the big salad I had for lunch, and then I'm out in the yard to sweat and grunt with the weeds until dark.